Day 15 - Self Harm as self abuse

desteniiprocess.com

From since I can remember I have always had a point of seeing myself inferior to others specifically that i am not able to handle myself well with other people, I can never to me in my mind get to a point where i can actually just be stable, be humble, be here, though this a form of an idea/belief, equaling not real, cause i see i can breathe, i can be humble, i can be here in the here moment of myself, i can be present, I can stop my thoughts, my emotions, my feelings, so it is possible. I am in a point of again walking through resistances of, its the living of it, so when i don't walk the points of self support through walking through the resistance, walking the self forgiveness, and changing myself, this creates self judgment and in this self abuse where i believe and start to spiral into self defeat. 

This just causing more consequence, so it's in a way useless and harmful to all as self as it just takes longer to get through what is here as self's process of self change to align with what is best for all. We all will walk this process, its a matter of the process each one individually will go through based on one's self honesty and sticking to the life principles in one's living, which is common sense. Obviously the longer one takes, the more harm, and in this all have to wait and this creates more pain. Why? I ask myself this a lot, why am i doing this? why can't i stop here now? why can't i see the solutions when it's so obvious? what cause me to fall so much and so often? And I keep moving back to the basics, the application and self will, the more one stick to the basics and continue to change and do what is best for all, the stronger and so stable one will become in the face of what is here and what needs to be walked by self, and in this this is best for all, suffering ends/pain is released.

This is  a test this earth, and life is here, the innocence that exist within and as everything, it's here, yet also is our cross to bear and face our maker which is ourselves, not a pretty sight for myself but there is no point in getting emotional about it, best is to self forgive and keep walking the change that is best for all life. 

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for mistakes and failures in my process where i have deliberately abused life and gone into reaction as anger where i did not consider the outflow of my actions and thus created myself in a de-maned state where life as myself and those around me became of pain and suffering and in this i take responsibility.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the ills of life where i accept myself to go into nonsense where my life becomes about possessions and falling and failing instead of stopping this and letting go of the addictions to energy highs as if this is what life is.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for falling and failing in addictions in my life when i was to stop and stand, causing consequences i could not for see and were of harm to life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i am weak as an emotional point of inferiority, instead of seeing that weakness in the body as physical is real, though it can always be adjusted and aligned based on what is practical for life and one's environment. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for the harm i have cause by not stopping when i was able to and thus avoid consequences that are were more then i could foresee and thus cause more consequence and harm then was necessary.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hold myself in contempt in the past and not truly forgive myself and let go, and thus never allow and accept such consequences ever again.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for the reach of harm that my actions specifically have caused to life in many and all forms through the self interest and deception that my actions participated in and as.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself for my judgment on myself for causing life as innocence to be corrupted and enslaved due to self interest and addictions.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to energy.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for being addicted to energy and wanting to harm myself for such abuse that i can see and understand that is going on in this world where the innocence of life is harmed and corrupted because of my ignorance.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become ignorant within and as my life and the life that is here, and not care about what was happening but be narrow minded on what i desired and what i believed and thus didn't do the proper self investigation within self honesty and thus allowed innocence to fall as i allowed myself to fall. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fall and the innocence of life to fall because i believe i am weak and inferior and thus allowed myself to live this out, where it's i understand and realize not about being strong or weak, but standing in principle and having no morality within the point of doing what is best for all life where life is understood in the degree where no harm is ever allowed and it stops as i stop myself.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for not stopping. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to betray others within my world where i judged them based on ideas and thoughts and in this lost my integrity and innocence within this life as i allowed myself to become de-monic and harmful through addictions and not being self honest. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for betraying myself and life within my actions of addiction and being self dishonest.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire the addiction of the energy i was generating and in this become possessed by it through ideas of love and caring when in reality it was about my addictions.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge those who were involved instead of letting go of the judgment, stand in the shoes, and realize i am part of that and thus i must forgive myself for these points and direct it in a way that is best for all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as superior and part of something more, when in reality, again it was a desire and hope. I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be special and more then, and so i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire a hope that things would be better. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe in hope.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to follow hope. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to follow my desires.

I see, realize, and understand hope and desires are part of the mind as separation, when life is here as myself and the actions for a better world is within the actions day to day as my self change and walking into the system and changing it in a way that is best for all through changing myself in the moments and living what is best for all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame others, i see, realize, and understand blaming anyone for my reactions within me is harmful and creates more separation and abuse. 

I commit myself to let go of judgment of myself, leave it in the past, and stand up in myself each moment breathe by breathe, forgiving myself for my reactions, and changing myself in my physical day to day by being self disciplined and doing what is best for all in the moment.

I commit myself to stop my self abuse by stopping all addictions, by actually living the change and stopping and so prove it in reality by specific action plans and testing myself such as being in a room of sweets and not indulging.

I commit myself to stop all blame and take responsibility for myself, direct where and how i can to support a world that is best for all.

I commit myself to be gentle and humble with myself even with the mistakes and falls and failures, so i can continue to correct myself and do what is best for all. 

I commit myself to stop my ignorance and embrace all as myself as self acceptance as i am all that is here, i am the system and thus i accept this and so i can change it by not reacting, i forgive myself when i react and reestablish my stand in what is best for all life. 

I commit myself to never betray others or myself, and stand in vulnerability and self honesty to never again allow the enslavement of life as myself and for this to be done enough is enough.

I commit myself to never give up on myself or what is best for all life until it's here for all as self.

I commit myself to restore my innocence through self forgiveness and self change in living what is best for all and thus i can stand one day in humbleness in the innocence of what is here as life.

www.desteni.org
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www.creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Self Help course to start the journey to life:
lite.desteniiprocess.com


Best for all life until it's done.

Change in the Small Accumulation and Desteni i Process - Day 528

How has the desteni i process supported me to change in a massive way through everyday small moment change. Here I speak about the accumulation effect that occurs when one put there self will into something through a point of bullying and insecurity that I walked into confidence and self respect. This through walking specific tools shared in the desteni process, which supported this massive change I have walked in my life for the betterment of not only myself, but everyone around me. Enjoy.

More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!

http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material - 

http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support: 

http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki: 

http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ... 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Living In Ignorance, Is There a Gift? Day 499

Photo Source

To continue with my last blog, I wrote on the point of how through ignorance of my actions I fell on a commitment I had made and lived for quite some time, and within this ignorance, I am seeing through support of others and my own self introspection I am making this fall more then what it really is. I have attached emotions and thinking to this fall to blow it out of proportion and as well accumulate it with energy, which will further extend until I release it through some abusive way. Because when I am not directing myself in my mind as the thoughts and emotions that come, I require to move through it simply by breathing and remaining physical and practical with what is here in my current life circumstance.

What I do know and have proven to myself is that I am able to learn and grow from my falls and push myself to do better next time it comes up. To beat myself up over it actually takes more energy and exhausts me more.

So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become ignorant based on what and how I am doing what and how I am doing in my world without consideration of others and myself in what I have committed in word and so did not live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a point of self abuse based on what I do in a moment not seeing, realizing, and understanding that within a fall there is a key or gift I can take with me and learn from always so I can be more equipped and skilled to take the point on the next go around and stand my ground and live my words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into an ignorance about what I am doing where I will go into a blankness and a postitive energy veil where I believe that I am ok and doing fine while I am deliberately going against my word due to the desires that I have built up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up desires, wants, and needs about a particular action in reality believing I need it more then anything and that I will not be able to get it anywhere else but within this experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can only get a specific experience of freedom and fun and physical enjoyment through this particular substance and so believe that I am really enjoying myself when in fact it is just a mind simulation of these words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live freedom, fun, and enjoyment through a substance because I fear that I will never be able to get this myself due to beliefs that I am not good enough and not capable enough to live these words for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can’t live these words fun, freedom, and physical enjoyment due to the belief that I am not good enough and not patient enough to live this in my day to day living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become frustrated with myself because I have not been able to live the word patiences when in reality I have not lived nearly the 10000 hours it takes to master a specific skill one sets out to accomplish.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stop trying and pushing myself due to a belief that I am not patient enough and I will never be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will never be patient enough when in reality it is a matter of breath awareness and perseverance to see a task through and self direction to do what is best in each moment which I have proven to myself I can do.

I commit myself to let go of the act of ignorance within what I do and align myself life and living to living my words and standing with integrity in what is best for all.

I commit myself to redefine the words fun, freedom, physical enjoyment, patience’s and perseverance to stand in these words and direct myself in my world to live them.

I commit myself to stop beliefs within emotional thought patterns of  fear and self abuse and transform it into the living of the word acceptance, self achievement, and reality based living through breath.

I commit myself to walk the 10000 hours to master living words process in what I speak and live and so live my highest potential in this life. 

Check out more support at:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Others Walking This Process
Destonian Social Network
Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site 

Impatiences: Enough is Enough, Steps to Change - Day 464

When I first wake up in the morning, this is a exceptional time to direct myself within the day I will live moving forward, I tend to go into my mind in these times and judge myself, especially when I am in the mirror getting ready. I find this will then lead into my day where I will go into my mind and create scenarios about others and how they are treating me, distracting myself from how I am in fact creating what I am experiencing and so then not taking responsibility for myself to change, which causes this scenario to continue to occur over and over again.

One of the outflow consequences of this I am experiencing within myself and within my world is impatience’s. I am quite astonished at how repetitive my world is and how much I go into blame and distraction toward others, when I have not once until recently looked within myself, taken responsibility for myself, and so change and correct that which does not work. I also find that this impatience towards others creates a lot of strain within the relationships I am involved in which causes stress and anxiety, so allowing this to continue and perpetuate is causing unnecessary strain within myself and so within those I am causing consequence with.

I am going to write out the self forgiveness and self correction here to let go of the scenario I wrote out about, and correct this point to be best for myself and so best for those whom I interact with.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in the mornings when I wake up go into my mind and criticize the way I look and compare myself to pictures in my mind of what I should look like.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself in a way that separates me from the existence that is here where we all exist in a form of individuality through our physical though exist as life one and equal within all as the physical that exists within all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow my mind within the belief that I am not attractive and that I have no purpose if I am not perfect within the way I look toward others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as unattractive because I have judged my eyes and my face based on memories of boys judging my eyes and face specifically as less then.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself based on memories in my mind through a time within my life where it is not certain what were the specific events and what the boys where going through within themselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself by external factors where I see myself in a specific way according to what is being done onto me or said onto me, when in reality I am not clear in what is behind what is being said and why as well as can’t really know directly why it is being done to me, and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself by others and who they are at that time as I see, realize, and understand that others are also walking their process as a mind and don’t consider me as an equal and so can harm me or speak to me in ways that are not best for all and I realize this is not who they are nor myself, and with this awareness I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall into the energy of emotions and not stand as a support for others to show as an example what it means to stand through emotion and stand as a life support through not accepting what others say or do and so direct self within how one see is best for all and will create a solution for what is happening.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into emotion rather then stand within the principle of what is best and walking what is here as self support and self honesty, correcting that which is not best, and standing within the resistance to continue as it is comfortable to stay in and as the mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall into emotion and not breath and move through this find solutions for these moments where I stand in the face of challenges and find solutions as I see, realize, and understand I am capable as I am able to walk common sense through stopping the mind from moving fast and falling into the energy that will create distractions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for when I see, realize, and understand I am not standing within my utmost potential and push myself beyond my perceived limitations to walk what is necessary to be walked in the time to come.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take full responsibility for what I have created here and so blame others and become emotional with others to distract from the fact that I am not standing and moving myself in the way I realize I am able to.

When and as I see I am moving in the morning within a suppression and an energy of self abuse, I stop and breath, and let go of these thoughts by doing self forgiveness and self commitments as I realize these will only create a heaviness within me and a point of self compromise as I accept these thoughts as real and so direct myself from my mind rather then my self living here in self acceptance and self direction in self honesty and common sense.

When and as I see I am going into a point where I am blaming another for something that I am experiencing within myself, I stop and breath, and realize that I am not taking responsibility in that moment to stop what I am creating as separation and abuse, and find the correction process to move into a point of self stability as well as self change that brings about solutions that is best for all.

I commit myself to in the mornings when I wake up, breath and breath until I am here and walk self forgiveness for any points that are cycling.

I commit myself to accept myself in the mirror and do any self forgiveness to any memories or pictures that come up to distract me and take me away from here.

I commit myself to move into self acceptance as well as accepting others for how they are and find solutions that are best in the moment to solve issues rather then reacting and creating emotional issues with others.

I commit myself to apply myself in real time self change to become stable in moments that I see I have a choice to go into the mind or be stable, I commit and move into stability in these moments through pushing myself to be stable and using the tools of self change to remain here, present, and creating solutions for what is here to do what is best for all.

Interview to check out on the topic of impatience:
Impatience - Reptilians - Part 225

Check Out these Awesome supportive sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site

Impatience: How does Self Abuse Relate? Day 463

Impatience for me has been something that has been with me for a long time, I have always been frustrated with this point within myself and with my life because it seems that there is something off about why I am experiencing myself in such a way and why my reality is also experiencing themselves in this way. Obviously now, I realize it is based on the mind generating energy, though when I was young, I expressed the frustration usually in yelling or violence. I did not realize that stopping my thoughts about something willingly also support with stopping the emotions like impatience, and so makes me more stable and able to solve problems productively rather then creating more and more conflict. This understanding certainly supports with the process of changing this point from controlling me to directing me within it.

I listened to Anu tonight in regards to this point, so I do have some greater perspective on what impatience means within the mind/physical/beingness relationship inside self, so that is a cool foundation point, which I will continue to utilize as I continue to walk this point with more depth and specificity. This a side note : )

So in terms of this interview, what was discussed is how impatience is a form of automation within us that was preprogrammed into the mind to create a separation from self and the physical. So within myself what am I doing in my day to day living that is causing this separation between what I am living here and when I go into impatient? One point I was looking at was the trigger points of some of this impatient reactions I go into with my partner or with people at work, and I see initially there is a thought that comes up that I judge myself, such as I look ugly today or I am not feeling pretty, because in the morning I had a thought that I was looking tired. From here, I came into work with this thought and so when someone would create a movement that I perceived that they were judging me I would go into my mind and react, and then create an impatience with that person not because of anything they did, but because I wanted to distract myself from the fact that I am feeling uncomfortable around them based on my perception of feeling like I am being judged.

When in reality, I judged myself initially in the beginning of the day and created the experience that others are judging me, and then go into a reaction of impatience and create abuse as my outflow with people, when what really happened is that I reacted to my own judgment in the morning, which trigger my experience for the day that I followed of ‘feeling tired, and so ugly’. I am creating this whole scenario myself and blaming/projecting on others something that they are not doing and further, I have no reference to where they are at within themselves. And so creating this scernerio of becoming impatient, annoyed, and the outflow usually quick, frustrated, or rude to others is deliberate and unacceptable as I creating it this way when it doesn’t have to be.

So I am noticing that my outflows of impatience in one dimension is based on self judgments I hold of myself such as ‘I am ugly today’ as a backchat thought, and then any sign of being dismissed or any negative perception I accept within myself of what others are doing/insinuating/saying to me, I use impatience as a defense and protection mechanism to push people away and become the authority of the situation. Here I have power and I squash others before they have the chance to judge me as how I have judge myself, I am afraid of being judged as how I have judged myself. It’s a self perpetuating cycle of self abuse I am creating and so abusing others around me because I am judging myself initially, blaming others for the way I am experiencing myself around them, and then abusing them because I am afraid to face the fact that I am doing this to myself, and so ultimately resisting the change process this will take to stop and live as an equal with others, let go of my self judgments, and stop allowing this cycle of energy addiction to continue.

Well not any longer will I accept and allow this playout to continue, I am going to next write the self forgiveness and correction process to be lived in my next blog and then further open up more dimensions to this point of impatience in later blogs, thanks for reading.

Interview to check out on the topic of impatience:

Impatience - Reptilians - Part 225

Check Out these Awesome supportive sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site

Update: How I Have Been Letting Go of Self Judgment - Day 442

Updating on my process of letting go of self judgment, this I have walked in many blogs and vlogs. Thanks.

"Here I speak on some points on how I have started to walk the self judgment of myself to a point of letting it go. What tools and support have I used to help identify and let go of these triggers that send me in the downward spiral of the consequences of judging myself? And how I am continuing to walk this transcendence of living with self compromise to become a self directed human being?"


Some Blogs I have written on self judgment:
Day 281 – Self Judgment – The Point I don’t Want to Face
Day 282 – Self Judgment – Fueling the Imprisonment of Self as the Mind
Day 283 – Self Judgment – Judging My Physical – The ‘Flawed’ Eye
Day 284 – Self Judgment – Judging My Physical – The ‘Flawed’ Eye – Self Commitments to Live – Part 1

Check Out these Awesome and Life Supporting sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network

Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site

Moving Beyond Limitations – Self Correction on an Embarrassing Moment – Day 435

So through walking the forgiveness of myself in my last post within these moments of becoming embarrassed and experiencing it physically when my checks turn red, I can see and so give myself a correction process to walk as I continue my living in the future with these sorts of occurrences that are sure to come up again.

Here I will walk the self correction process needed:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in the belief I have created about myself that others are trying to put me down and harm me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame this belief I have of myself as not being good enough onto others within a state of self victimization where I believe I am powerless to others and there effects on me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to victimize myself and project this inherent blame of the way in which I am experiencing myself as the victim and powerless onto others in my world and reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project blame onto others within my world and in my reality based on me holding onto a belief that others are trying to harm me and abuse me.

When and as I see myself going within myself and creating a thought process of blame onto another person for me experiencing myself in energy when I go red in my face, I stop and breath, and realize that I am just creating a state for myself to hide in and escape from what I am actually doing to myself as creating a place for me to not have to change my experience of myself and face others in situations where I am uncomfortable. I realize by victimizing myself and blaming others, I am disempowering myself to move beyond these moments of self compromise and stand within this and create myself new in these moments in expression that will be come lived if I move beyond this fear and belief that I am being abused and harmed by others.

I commit myself to breath and move beyond my desire to blame others for the experiencing I am having within myself.

I commit myself to let go of the desire to make my experience within myself of for instance getting embarrassed and my face turning red be about the external reality, and within this I commit myself to find the source and so the solution to how to change this action of blame into self movement to become equal to this experience and transform it into a beneficial moment of seeing that I am able to change this and create something new from it.

I commit myself to stop blaming others through turning these moments back onto myself and seeing where am I doing and creating this experience within myself, and so I commit to within these findings create solutions and corrections for myself so I can change and transform these moments to empower myself and so others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief within myself of me being powerless to others based on the energy experience I have accepted within me of feeling inferior and diminished around others because of something they said or did in my presence that I took as a personal attack or abuse towards me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abdicate responsibility within not seeing, realizing, and understanding that I am the creator of this experience of inferiority and diminishment within me due to judging myself within myself in ways of seeing myself as not doing well within this event and comparing myself to other people around me, and so then believe within me that that is what everyone else is doing and saying about me in their minds and also in my perception I have defined within there actions towards me within their gestures and even words.

When and as I see I am abdicating my responsibility of having to find why I am existing in ways that does not support self growth and come to corrections, I stop and breath, and realize that within taking responsibility I have the opportunity to move beyond my self interest of only seeing who and what I want to see based on my own judgments and self abuses, and find where and how I can support myself to change and stop the self abuse I am doing onto myself through comparing and judging myself with others.

I commit myself to stop comparing who I am within a moment and who others are, and so I commit to focus on my own self movement, my own self growth, and through this and once this has been proven for myself extend it to others by supporting them to see how I have changed and not make it about comparing and competition.

I commit myself to move beyond my desires to compare and compete, and see within myself who I will be if I dare to change myself within this moments by seeing in self honesty and changing myself step by step in a self creation process.

I commit myself to walk the self creation process of standing within embarrassing moments and all moments I will face as a sales women, and correcting myself within taking responsibility for who I am and how I will change myself to correct and stand stable.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take other peoples words, gestures, or ideas, beliefs, imaginations within my own mind personal and believe that this is who I am when I see, realize, and understand and have proven to myself that when I move as breath here and align with my body and act, I am able to perform in a manner that I am satisfied with and that is aligned with my expression, and so I see, realize, and understand that I have a decision to make in these moments to either go into a point of diminishment experience of things that are not based on fact and reality, and so can not be trusted or walk what is here, what is stable, what I can trust, myself in action here as I breath, aligned with the physical and who I am here in the moment of speaking.

I commit myself to breath through the moments where I want to listen to my thoughts and my backchat, I commit to let go of these thoughts, I commit myself to move into physical movement as physical correction to change my living of self diminishment to self creation in the moment of what is here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as bad in the moment of believing I was being judged and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project my own judgments and comparison of myself as not good enough onto another person and then accept that I am being held down and abused, when I see, realize, and understand that I am doing this to myself, I am abusing myself in my own mind, and not changing in those moments to what is stable, what supports me as life and my expression, and what creates me as life and that is through my living here in the moment as I speak and stopping my participation in these thoughts, energy experiences, and my mind within memories.

When and as I see I am projecting abuse onto others in my reality, I stop and breath, and realize that I am projecting my own mind and how I am toward myself as self abusive, and so realize that I must stop my own participation within judging myself, comparing myself, diminishing myself, thinking less then who I really am, and so interiorizing and making myself superior to others to make myself feel an good, instead of being here and living within what is best for all and so creating this as myself within the way I live.

I commit myself to let go of my desire to be better then others, and so I commit myself to stop the abuse of myself and others in my mind.

I commit myself to let go of my belief that I am less then others and that I am not good at anything.

I commit to stop judging myself and so I commit myself to stop projecting this abuse onto others in my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in that moment of judgment towards myself in my mind as doing bad when explaining the product to the vendor and thinking he must see me really being pathetic within trying to explain this, and so react within a physical moment of embarrassment accepting and allowing this moment to define me as a point of proof that I am bad through defining and judging myself as not doing good cause my face went red.

I forgive  myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for going red in the face when I speak and react, and believe I am less then the other person talking because of me being uncomfortable visibly in front of them and going red, when I realize, see, and understand this is not in fact real, I am making this up, and it does not benefit me in anyway, so I realize I can change in that moment, let the mind go and the beliefs and judgments, and move myself beyond that limitation into immediate correction which is here within myself in awareness in what direction I will walk next as I speak in my expression in the moment.

I commit myself to see and understand that who I am in the moment is not defined by others, and so I commit myself to move beyond this limitation of belief and direct myself.

I commit to direct myself in these moments where I go red in the face, through breathing, and staying focused on the topic at hand, and continuing to speak and push myself until the moment is cleared.

I commit to never give up and continue to push myself until I am stable and able to speak with ease as I have proven it through space time within the natural learning ability of the physical body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto that memory of me being seen in the moment of going red in the face and visible being uncomfortable as a reminder that I am less then others and go into that sinking feeling of powerlessness when I remember the moment I go red and what that feeling felt like, when I realize, see, and understand that it is not defining me here, it is an occurrence that I can learn from and realize how to correct the point, but I also realize, see, and understand that it’s just an energy experience of powerlessness, I am not this actually, I can move myself in each moment and change myself in what direction I will to what makes sense in the moment and what will benefit all and so myself, walking common sense and real time application within breathing, correcting, and living.

When and as I see this memory come up of my face going red with another human being, I stop ad breath, and realize that this moment is just a moment in time where I allowed judgment onto myself, and so I realize I am not judgment nor am I energy, I am able to direct myself in these moments and create myself new within the expression of myself that is here in that moment.

I commit to not allow this energy of embarrassment direct me in future moments by realizing it is not real and can be moved through into stability.

I commit myself to push self expression in these moments of resistance due to a memory by seeing this is not who I really am and I can create myself in all moments within the moment that is here by simply living it, simply doing it.

 I commit to live discipline in moving myself in moments where I am embarrassed and want to retreat, I move beyond this moment, and found a way to express myself and create a point of something new that I wouldn’t have if I just allowed suppression.  

Interview Support on the topic of moving through Embarrassment:
Embarrassment: Embarrassment and Personalities - Atlanteans - Part 106
Embarrassment: Is it Really so Bad? - Atlanteans - Part 107
Embarrassment: Sounding Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans – Part 108

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What is the Physical Showing Me? Stomach Nervousness - Day 413

Writing the Pattern out the Physical is Showing:

Looking within the direct seeing of the physical, the stomach nervousness, the acidic nature of it, causing it to burn in my stomach feeling like I am creating holes within my physical flesh, this the physical consequence of the energy allowing to be created over and over again everytime I go into this nervousness. This being physically lived through the disease that has manifested in my physical body called Crohns disease. The point that is causing this is with a group of people where I judging my physical features and judging and comparing myself to them based on this point of seeing myself inferior to them. This only causing my physical to get damaged in this way due to the point that I am creating it.

Self Forgiveness on Pattern of Nervousness/Anxiety:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become anxious and create energy of an acidic nature within my body due to the fear points that are created within me of seeing myself less then others and fearing being viewed in this way by them as less then due to this judgment I hold that I am not able to compete because I am not physically equal to them in our picture.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my physical form within a limitation of image only and compare image only to others in a way to try and gain feelings of appreciation and admiration from others through being better looking and thus creating the opposite as a conflict point within myself of this idea I have created that I have to be beautiful to be accepted. And so I experience the opposite as being ugly and thus less then those who are beautiful. I realize this creates always a polarity within me of separating myself from all that are here who in the physical are in fact equals to me, we are not separate based on image that is illusion we are here as life as we are all physical and we are in fact equal as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a physical reaction within my physical body of acidity and burning of the physical stomach line based on using my mind only to interpret reality and what is here happening within what others do to me or act towards me creating a specific relationship with these actions or sayings in where I take it personally. I realize that it is not personal but more a point of showing the physical reactions of what is here and has to be transcended in the moment for me and for others to let go of the physical as image, as ideas, as pictures only, and see it for what it is here as one with all life, no matter the form, and thus being able to direct the point into a stability of realizing that we both equally have the right to be here and enjoy this expression within what it is and what it will be in the potential that is always here to be one and equal with the life within and as the physical.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have this relationship of how others look, behave, or speak around me determine who I am within my beingness, I realize that I as well as all are not perfect within what is here and thus have points still that need aligning when relevant, but what is here is here and thus I walk the equality of what is here within what will be best for all until it is done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cause physical harm to my body as disease in my stomach from the fear and nervousness where I created this belief that I am at a lost within myself, I need something more, I need more entertainment points for me to be able to be satisfied instead of realizing I am already here, I already have the point to walk to be here and thus access my real potential as life to support what will be best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create burns in my stomach based on judging my physical body and not seeing it as good enough.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my body as not good enough based on a mind interpretation of how others I perceive are seeing me as my body instead of standing as my physical and with my physical in acceptance instead of looking for it out there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not accept myself within the point of my physical image and thus I realize I need to unconditionally let go of the desire to be more or better and see what is here direct as physical life in each moment as it really is as physical beings living and breathing.

Self Correction of the Pattern of Anxiety/Nervousness:

When and as I go into any movement of judgment or perception of how others see me and go into thoughts of taking it personal as ‘they are seeing me as ugly’ I stop and breath, and immediately let go of the thought, breath through the energy, and release the energy through breathing until it is clear. I can walk the point of allowing the other to do what they do and focus on my own communication, my own physical movements, and what the other is saying within learning from them to be able to align and direct myself in the best way possible to support what is best for all.

I commit myself to stop the fear of judgment of my physical by committing myself to let go of all and every thought or energy of burning sensation or tightness in my stomach, and move myself to focus on my physical, my breath, and what the other is saying.

I commit to listen to the words regardless of the movements of the other.

I commit myself to focus on what is being said and stop specifying on what the person is doing.

I commit myself to let go unconditionally any and all gestures others make towards me as I realize that it is a physical point and that is what is here to be faced by each one.

I commit myself to push through the point of limiting myself due to fear and inferiority, and walk the process in all moments to align myself with the fact that we are equals.

Cool Support to Help Transforming Nervousness to Self Empowerment:

Deconstructing Nervousness - Atlanteans - Part 89
Overcoming Nervousness - Atlanteans - Part 90
Overcoming Nervousness (Part 2) - Atlanteans - Part 91
Sounding Self Forgiveness for Nervousness - Atlanteans - Part 92
Finalising Nervousness Support - Atlanteans - Part 93

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