Some More on My Journey with Self Honesty and DIP - Day 574

Photo Source

"2. The Principle of Self-Honesty

Reflecting on myself and seeing every part of me (the good, bad, and ugly) without bias or judgment so that I can take responsibility to change that which I no longer accept and allow."
http://desteni.org/about-us/desteni-principles

So in past blogs I shared on different aspects of self honesty and how I have lived these words for myself, though this process is a journey I have found, it is not something that I can see ending. This is because self-honesty always challenges you, always pushes you to your outer limits and then pushes beyond that, so it's like an expanding (as I see it) adventure we are on. The adventure is the process one walks as you touch depths that have been untouched for eons of time within self, we have through alignments being made and lived, finally got an understanding of who we are and how we relate to the mind consciousness system. This is explained immensely in eqafe.com and all topics of human and all life.

This process of self-honesty also requires real humility and understanding as one face the most intense parts about this world and about self within it all. One point I have found that has been solid throughout my ten years of walking this process with self honesty is the fact that whatever opens up and is here to be introspected and considered in my honesty, I find the moment it opens up I realize and have a trust within me that I will see it through, that I can handle it, that I must walk this path and see it through to realize who I am within it. I find this point of adventure is lined within this process of self honesty because one is always pushing the edge of one's existence, though it also is a simplistic process in terms of the repetition of tools that are used and support you throughout, they are often referred to as 'The Basics'.

The self honest path of life brings you to question yourself and ask yourself who will you be in the face of your own abuse, the worst of yourself, the pain, the suffering you caused others, and deciding in moments how to direct oneself through all the accumulated consequence that has been accrued. This task seems scary at times and at times it is, though through these moments one can and does empower oneself if lived in self honest consideration and live the solution that is best for all. I have fallen hundreds of times, but that does not stop me as it is said it doesn't matter how many times you fall, what matters is that you get up and make a change for the better. This is what matters, the life that is being created through these realizations of self in one's own inner self honest moments one is going to face and decide on.

There is always support, one must though align with one's self honesty and live this as who one is to access these parts of self that have always been here, waiting to be 'found' and 'discovered' yet it is just an illusion, we have always been here walking with everything, self honesty brings what is real into awareness for us to face and live as a redefinition to keep walking the path of self creation in what is best for all.

Enjoy.

Support and educate yourself on the links shared:

http://www.eqafe.com - Check out the new unlimited subscription plan at Eqafe, it's fantastic!
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com
www.destonians.com
http://www.desteni.org
http://www.earthhaven.org

Garb Shares - One of my most Impactful Moments of My Life - Day 565

I invite you to share your most impactful moment that shifted your life!

For more on self-supportive material, 

check out: 

www.desteni.org 

www.destonians.com 

www.eqafe.com 

www.earthhaven.org

The Experience of Being Hurt - My Realizations and Forgiveness - Day 563

Who I am as being hurt by others?

When I am not considered within the point of conversation or interaction, and I take it personal that others are brush with me, quick, overlook what I say or don’t listen at all and go into a reaction, I see the experience of hurt come up within me. Like I have been disregarded, I am not respected, and thus I am alone in my reality. I feel rejected in these times which brings up the experience that I am not able to thrive in the way of my reality that I’d like to, wherein I am able to interact with others, take in what is expressed, and within that be at peace and calm within myself, and express back in a manner that shows a point of maturity that supports and creates life rather then disturbs and destroys.

So I am looking at this experience of acceptance from my reality where if I am not received in a way of getting some sort of positive feedback, I take it personal and become emotional within the experience of hurt. Hurt being the energy experience that feels like a pit opens in my stomach area and my being drops in there feeling lost, my body goes into a slouch and sinking experience, and I become quiet and reserved with others in these states. Tending to go within and shut down not allowing any communication or people to come in until I have recovered and in some area have been uplifted through a positive experience. Leaping from one area to another within myself of being hurt and being happy again through an external stimulus that I have used as addiction to distract me from what I am facing with this hurt experience.

So what I am facing within being hurt by others is the fact that I am seeking acceptance and comfort from them, which is where I get positive feedback and when I don’t receive it I become hurt and end up becoming reactive back. I will go into more detail with the words I live out because there are more. Though focusing on the hurt experience I am having, this will be for example when someone comes at me in a bad mood because something happens in there life and they are not super pleasant, I say something to them and they snap at me. I will experience this hurt experience at this moment and believe that they are being mean, and through this take it personal where my mood will change into being moodier, angered, and resentful. This causing many consequences that are not best for all.

So here I will walk self-forgiveness on this experience of being hurt, and let go of the belief that I need people to give me positive feedback to feel accepted in my environment.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience the people in my environment as hurtful when they express their own emotions in a time of weakness, and I take it personal believing that I am to blame or I am being rejected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself as feeling rejected and left out if I am not received within the people in my environment in a positive way where they express themselves in a way that shows that they like me and I am good in there presence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the experience of feeling hurt because I have taken it personal in the sense that I have defined myself within the output of others and if someone does not show me pleasantly I believe it’s because they don’t like me and there is something wrong with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not accept myself fully with the flaws and the points I have changed into the best, where I realize I am in a process of growth and rebirth changing myself daily to the best of my ability and pushing my will to give it my all this life, and thus this is something that I have created within me and so within this I have proven that I am for real and that I can be proud of that fact.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek acceptance outside myself instead of living this word within me as I create a home as my temple within and as myself as my physical body, giving myself care, positive feedback, and acceptance for who I am and releasing the idea that I am not enough, I am not good, and I need to do something to be accepted by others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need words of encouragement by others to feel fulfilled.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thought that I am not enough, when I see, realize, and understand that everything is here, I am enough as I am life fully, and I am able to walk the process as I see is here to become aligned to life one and equal.

I commit myself to create the moments in my day where I give myself care, self-care within myself of words of encouragement, gratefulness for who I have become, and recognizing the perseverance I have consistently shown to myself through difficult times and challenges to pull through and find solutions that support not only myself but others as well.

I commit myself to redefine the word home where I create a space within of comfort, safety, and relaxation as harmony in the understanding that this is a place of warmth to be at ease and know it’ll always be here as I am always here, it is within me thus home is here as me always I just have to breathe and create the space for myself.

I commit myself to give this care and warmth I will commit to live to myself to others unconditionally where I don’t seek anything in return, but practice my self fulfillment through living different ways and words that support me to take care and be self supported.

Support and educate yourself on the links shared:

http://www.desteni.org
http://www.eqafe.com
http://www.earthhaven.org

Focused Living - Day 558

How to Practically Live a Word - Focus

My current definition and how I see this word Focus:

Focus for me as how I have been seeing it and living it in the past is I am seeing as an undesired force put upon me in things that I did not want to focus on, mainly i am seeing my mom making me focus on things i had no real interest in like church or playing with dolls, this when i was little and thus being forced to focus on these things based on her needs and not my own. Also I am seeing school where teachers would make us focus on our school work in classrooms where i couldn’t get up and move around, and so I was forced to focus on subjects and topics in boxed rooms closed off to the outside world where i couldn’t move about in freedom, which i highly resisted. This would more be the negative attachments to the word focus i have placed in me. 

On the positive side, I am seeing the word focus as a means to an end where i get something, like money or accolades for focusing in on something, doing it well, and then being reward with some sort of praise or gift. Focusing then was done to inflate my ego or my experience of myself as superior through gaining something externally to make me feel more important or better about myself. So needing something externally like money or praise from others as a reward for me to feel something about myself in a positive way, and if i was focused in what i did I realized I had a better chance of getting these things that made me feel good about myself and my life.

My Redefinition: 

Focus - how i am seeing living the word focus is an actual physical movement within myself in moments where i become distracted in thinking and/or in things I am doing. So to live focus would be to move toward the center of myself in my awareness into the center of my body. It’s a supportive word that realigns my self awareness back to my center point and i am noticing that this center point focus is right in the middle of my chest, just above my breast bone and below my neck. This is specific this spot as it feels in a way like a source of strength, this strength is here within me as me and living this word focus when i move my awareness into my physical presence of myself as this center point in my chest and then i live it into the task i am doing I find my ability to live what it fact I set myself out to do becomes much more streamlined and specific, and I have less strain to in fact get it done. A support word I have found also is the words slowing down, which supports with moving from the busyness of the distraction such as thinking or getting entertained by something outside myself, slowing back to down to my physical breath and thus moving into the word focus which I again support myself with to move into this center point in my chest. From here, I move into the task I set out for myself to live. 

Contexts in how i will live this word Focus:

Work - In work i plan to write out a list when i first sit down at my desk and start my day, living the word focus, i am going to use this word as the redefined living of it to move my focus back to my physical body, working with centering my self awareness in that center point in my chest when i see i start to lose focus in my day and become distracted with desires such as checking facebook or getting up and speaking to people around the office unnecessarily just to not face what it is I must get done. Using the word focus and the action of become centered inside myself focusing on breathing and my physical body, I can move myself out of the desire to distract myself and stick to the task list i had made out in the beginning of my work day to stay on task and move through the day with more effective efficency. 

Yoga - Yoga is an activity i have been wanting to integrate in my day to day, though I have resisted it due to the uncomfortability in my body i feel in doing it because it is slow and hurts me as i am not that flexible. Here i plan to use the word focus to again focus my awareness on the physical, bringing me out of the distractions of my mind and into my physical body movements as i work with yoga positions and breathing techniques. 

Desire to give up at task during my day - I notice often how easily i tend to go into giving up when things become uncomfortable in my body or I have to put a bit more effort or even sometimes a lot more effort into something that I am doing. For example, I was bringing laundry up a flight of stairs and it was extra full and thus extra heavy. I wanted to give up and just drop it to get a break. I remembered this word focus with the movement of slowing down meaning moving out of my head in thoughts and back into my chest center point as my physical presence awareness, and from here i moved my awareness into my whole body. I found this supported with balancing myself in my body where i was using a lot more muscles and focus on these muscles rather then going into my head and wasting my energy in thinking and thus eventually giving into the desire to stop. So here i am going to use this word focus to support me in these moments where i want to give up and instead of giving up, center myself in my physical body, move into my self awareness as this chest center point, and from here as my self awareness is present live the word focus as i focus in on the task at hand and live that to get it done. 

Thanks all for reading and will report later in the week of how this is going. 

Lenient - Redefining to Live - Day 551

Lenient

Current Allocation:

I see i am lenient with my mind and thus my self based on indulgences i have allowed and become addicted to for a very long time. I find it difficult to stand within these patterns and thus i tend to accept and allow the word lenient to supersede that which would be best for me based on the level of addiction I have participated in over time, though i find that with commitment and patience this point can be walked to a satisfactory point. What i have realized is that with the deep addiction patterns, i have laced it with fear. So I have a fear that i will not be able to get out of the pattern cause i am too far gone or the mind energy is too much, and so this will inevitably get me and i will fall. This is where i find i have become lenient or accept and allow leniency, when i have fallen and slowly getting back up. As i am getting up, i will indulge in the addiction. So leniency has been a crux in a way, which I allow as indulgence of the mind and I do not stop, I allow myself to stay in the feeling of energy, get drunk in it in a way as i wallow in the giving up point until i stand again. It’s self manipulation and overall unacceptable as it’s not necessary to indulge in such a way, and the living of this word is done to not face myself and thus allow self indulgence, self interest, and giving into my mind addictions. I am not in judgment of myself, though i see this is a flag point because it’s consequential in a way of me taking longer then necessary to move through points that inevitably have to be walked to become more effective and trustworthy within myself, which is my commitment to me as life.




Dictionary Definition:

adjective

1. agreeably tolerant; permissive; indulgent:

He tended to be lenient toward the children. More lenient laws encouraged greater freedom of expression.

2. Archaic. softening, soothing, or alleviative.

Etymology:

lenient (adj.) Look up lenient at Dictionary.com

1650s, "relaxing, soothing" (a sense now archaic), from Middle French lenient, from Latin lenientem (nominative leniens), present participle of lenire "to soften, alleviate, allay; calm, soothe, pacify," from lenis "mild, gentle, calm," which probably is from PIE root *le- (2) "to let go, slacken" (source also of Lithuanian lenas "quiet, tranquil, tame, slow," Old Church Slavonic lena "lazy," Latin lassus "faint, weary," Old English læt "sluggish, slow," lætan "to leave behind").

The usual modern sense of "mild, merciful" (of persons or actions) is first recorded 1787. In earlier use was lenitive, attested from early 15c. of medicines, 1610s of persons. Related: Leniently.


Lenient Word Play:

Lean i shunt, I lend a bend, learn i can’t, learn i ain’t, lean i went,

Negative Polarity:

I see this word as a point of self diminishment and lack of will, i in a way fear I will exist in this state for too long, yet i will indulge it once and a while which makes me anxious over time cause i know i am not doing my best.


Postitive Polarity:

I see this word as a way of relaxing, getting support from another, when i good effort is put in - getting a hand from another and allowing them to support for a moment, so giving myself a moment to rest and kick back to relax and have a breather for self when I see if have given a best amount of effort in a agreeable timeframe.


Creative Writing:

Lenient is a place where you have to be self directed within, for a moment, to support with becoming balanced in one’s living if you put too much effort in and need to have a moment of relaxation, to create an equilibrium back to self stability. I have found mostly that it is allowed to be used as a crux to not become discipline in a moment and where I keep allowing a lean on my mind programming to bend around the self honesty of doing what has to be done in the physical and supporting myself to stand straight as self’s will and support and direct in a grounded matter.


Self Forgiveness:
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become lenient within myself to not have to face myself within the mirror of who i am existing as in my living world and so face self here, but allow a point of giving myself a lean to bend around that which has to be faced as i avoid the actual stand necessary to see who i am fully and walk the path of discipline to change what it is i am not willing as of yet to fully face head on and change.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become lenient in my own mind where i seek out the self satisfaction of mind addiction such as self abuse and thus allowing abuse with others via quantum movements of emotion through my presence or out right displaying anger or dislike within my words or behavior.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become to lenient within myself where i have allowed my mind to go unchecked because i am hiding and avoiding from myself the actual process of change necessary to walk which is a more direct and breath by breath process which i have judged as difficult.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to find walking this process to life and being here as breath to difficult to face and change and thus here accept and allow the word lenient to step in where i give up on myself allowing and accepting the thoughts that it’s too difficult and i can’t get it done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate and live into the belief that this process to life is too hard and i can’t do it through accepting and allowing the experience of giving up in these moments of energy veils that come over me of a heaviness and a depression, where i believe that it’s too much and it won’t be done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not in these moments question who i am and how i am accepting and allowing myself to be as depressed and in a state of giving up through allowing thoughts that it’s too hard and i can’t do it, and thus accept and allow the outflow of giving in to the experience of giving myself tolerance to indulge more into the addiction and the self interest when i see, realize, and understand that it’s time to stop and change.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use this experience of leniency in a way as self manipulation where i use it as a guise as to why i don’t have to stand in that moment, but can give up and give in to my addictions which is giving into the energy temptation and experience that i have become addicted to of living out the experience of the sensations of giving in and indulging to self interest.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not stand and walk breath and physical living in the simplicity of what is here as life living in the obvious and common sense equations that will support myself and others in the best way possible regardless what it takes as effort and movement, i walk cause it’s best not based on a feeling or experience.

I commit myself to when i see i am going into the experience of being lenient with myself, flag it and identify what pattern or addiction i am not facing and moving into a solution with.

I commit myself to walk a process within a day to identify this pattern and then start the process of solution point by point as this comes through.

I commit myself to support myself in the process by living the words discipline, care, life, steadfast, physical effort to do what has to be done to move through the addiction and create a new way of living that is self directed.

Lenient - Redefined:

Lenient is when i allow for a moment rest/support to rebalance myself into my physical living process and in the next moments move back into a stable walk. I also use this word as a flag to render the fact that i am indulging in this rest i give to myself to rebalance and thus manipulating myself to not have to stand and walk the walk that is necessary for correction in self creation. This to use as a support to realize that i am not standing in my best potential and change is required using the living words above and expand as i go.

For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below.

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Self Supportive Material -
www.Eqafe.com

Forum support:
www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life
https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4404004

Eqafe Hangout: Dealing with Difficult People - Day 550

Many thanks to Michelle for particpating and sharing her perspectives!

Find this interview here:

Dealing with Difficult People - Eqafe Recording

Interview Synopsis: 

"What does it tell you about yourself when there is someone in your life who you experience as being very difficult to be around?

How can you support yourself and the other person to step out of the destructive relationship dynamics?

Why is walking away from this person not the solution?" 

Here my guest and I will be giving perspective on our realizations and experiences within listening to the above interview and how it relates to our lives. Also, what we are doing to support ourselves to change this experience to be something of support for not only ourselves but all life in our environments. 

These hangouts are in support of creating a better world for all through education and self responsibility to become stewards of the earth and take care of each other in the best way of our abilities. 

Thanks for watching! 

Links to Check Out for More Support: 

A Chat with Sunette Spies: The Interdimensional Portal from Eqafe 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGp9D... 

Eqafe Site 

http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support: 

http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki: 

http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

More on Where I stand with Self Trust? Day 527

When looking at my relationship with the words self trust, I have for a long time been doubting myself, this creating a feeling or an experience within me that I am not doing enough, and this belief of not doing enough is causing unneeded stress in my already busy lifestyle. One point that I see here that I can look at is this experience of not doing enough, because in many ways I do do a lot, I work full time and have many extra responsibilities that I am working on. Though within this, I still feel like I could be giving my time to more things, more activities, more projects to push ahead and spearhead my future creation of what my ideals are. In this spearheading, I see I am missing two very important dimensions and this is the time dimension, meaning what it takes to walk something into creation and also the understanding dimension, where I at this stage do not have enough information or still require to walk a process of self creation/living to specify and define who and what I indeed would like to create and so understand how to actually create this within and as myself. So pushing for something in my mind such as doing more, I see is counterproductive to the actual self creation process I could be and have to walk to create that which I would like to live in my highest potential.

So some points I need to consider is why I am not moving on these points that I want to change, and many of the shortcomings are addictions I have in my day to day living. Addictions that I am afraid to let go of, and within this afraid of change. So here I require to make a plan and move within this plan, so I can indeed create. Because if I don't start changing what is created is a resonance or presence of self compromise as I am not moving myself where I know and understand I indeed can. So if one is not creating self, then one will then actually be creating self compromise and thus self diminishment as I are actually accepting and allowing it, I have created all of it through thoughts, reactions, and living in separation as these beliefs, ideas, reactions, ect.

What I have learned over the years of walking the desteni I process is not to judge myself for these types of process points I have to walk, it is not to create any reaction toward self, but to understand the point, why it occurred, and then simple walk the correction path to change it. This is the most efficient way I have found as there is nothing gained by judging self for failing or becoming harsh with self, as this literally only causes diminishment within self, so really it doesn’t make sense. Though if you see you are judging yourself, walk the tools of self forgiveness, self correction, and change self within this to then stabilize, so the tools are incredible, simplistic, and specific to move self in this process in whatever point or process of the mind or self compromise one face. Again, process is a process of self understanding and self creation through self correction, so it will take time, patiences, and lots of mistakes, but overtime and as one persevere change will start to occur.

Here I will write self forgiveness on doubt:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a doubt about who I am and how I am living based on an energetic experience coming up of anxiety through thoughts that I am not doing enough.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into an energetic possession of fear based on a belief of if i don’t do enough and I lack and lag behind I will not be able to catch up thus squandering my chances to become life here in the physical and so fearing annihilation in the afterlife.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thought that I am going to be annihilated if I stop pushing myself so hard and believe that i within this I will not be able to catch up.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to keep score of who is who within this process and how far i have walked and within this create a polarity of best and worst causing separation and comparison with my environment.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create a separation with my environment due to the belief that I am not going to be able to keep up with others thus comparing myself to others creating this race experience in the first place which I see, realize, and understand is not real.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create the experience that I am in a race and I must finish and do the best because of a fear of survival where I see, realize, and understand this is stemming from childhood where I would compete with my siblings to be seen, heard, and validated by my parents and so always strive to be the best.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to my siblings and believe I am only safe if I am seen as the best and validated by what i have done and could do by my parents in praise or admiration, and within this define who I am based on these words and praises.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief that I have to win and be the best to be able to survive and become somebody in this reality that’ll be safe and survive, and so within this create a belief that this is the only way it is and I only know who I am based on what my environment is saying to me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to the external world I was living in believing that that is who defines me, when i see, realize, and understand that I miss the fact that who i am is based on my own self creation and within this I am limitless to the potentials that I can create within and through my own self will and self awareness.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become stuck within the words and energies of others in my environment as something or someone that defines me, when I see, realize, and understanding I am giving permission for it to define me as I am accepting and allowing it to define who I am as I am believing it is true.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself within not enough based on comparison and beliefs of self diminishment or self validation based on the instability of the outside world and the corruptness of the inner self creation process that this has on who I am actually creating myself into, someone who is separated and not stable within who I am as self here in self honesty.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take on others beliefs, emotions, energies, and words as who I am instead of investigating these words for myself, and redefining them in words that I understand for me and thus can live for me.

When and as I see myself moving into a point of self diminishment within my self living by accepting and allowing any point outside myself to define who I am, I stop and breath, and i realize that I am able to define who I am through redefining my understanding of the word(s) and so living within this redefinition process so I create me from self understanding and self awareness.

I commit myself to stop and breath when I see I go into a movement of either positive or negative based on an outside influence and correct myself into understanding the word for myself through redefining it and living it for me.

I commit myself to let go of the beliefs that I am defined by my past where i believed i had to compete to move into the process of equality and oneness of all life, and creating myself breath by breath through my own self awareness movement.

I commit myself to stop judging and creating separation with what is here, move into understanding, and finding solutions for what is here in the highest potentials possible.

I commit myself to move from self doubt as not enough to slowing down and walking what is here in each moment to the best of my ability.

I commit myself to move from self doubt as diminishing to self creation as expansion.



More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Living Words – Discipline – Morning Routine – Self Forgiveness and Self Change - Day 521

This is a continuation of this Blog:

My Process So Far of Living Words – Day 518

Here I am walking the living of this word discipline in a specific scenario, one that I have been challenged with and that is within the addiction to sleep. There has been a process I have been walking in relation to waking up at 5am and being productive at this time with either writing, exercising, or working in some way or another. What I have realized is that I am being controlled by the desire to sleep, the grogginess, the beliefs that I have to sleep more, the idea that sleeping is healthy, and the rest of the mind backchat that I have been participating in based on the physical programming that I have allowed where sleep feels like it is impossible to stop. Though even with this challenge I have given myself, it is not complicated, it is actually quite simplistic, it takes actions, it takes self will, it takes physical movement, and at the start it takes discipline to move beyond the programming.

So I am going to first do self forgiveness on some dimensions I found in my last blog you can find here, and correct those dimensions so they are clear within me, first one is the dimension that I am attaching the emotion of anxiety to the word discipline because I have created a belief that if I am going to walk discipline I have to succeed within it, if I fail then I will be showing myself that I am not actually what I hope I am, and that is disciplined.

Self forgiveness on anxiety, expectation, and hope in relation to the word discipline:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach an emotion of anxiety to the word discipline based on a fear that I will not succeed within what it is that I am desiring to be disciplined within and through that create a hope that I will be this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a reaction of hope based on the thought and picture of me being disciplined within my living where I see that I could be this successful person who is disciplined and within this I could be hard working, and this is what I desire for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as a failure if I don’t live up to this desire of myself within the picture I have created of being successful in my disciplined action and within this create the anxiety if I don’t fall and don’t live up to my expectation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an expectation that I have to succeed within this in a way that is quick and powerful, where I show that I am strong and can do anything, based on the hope that this is how I am when I see, realize, and understand this is being created within my mind with energy, and is in fact not who I am, as I only realize, see, and understand who I am by walking the process of living the word discipline to my highest potential and within this, I see, realize, and understand this will continue to expand as I live it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a picture of my dad as the example I am living up to as a point of discipline and within this create an idea of what I have to do and how I have to live as this absolute discipline he lives where he walks his day specifically and with discipline, but for me I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that he too walked a process to get to where he is at, and within me, I am not defined nor limited by a picture in my head of what I have to be like as this process is unique to who I am and what I will create in my process as I redefine and live the word discipline within the creation of myself each moment.

When and as I see I am going into a point of self sabotage with the belief that I have to be successful and like my dad, I stop and breath, and realize that I don’t need to define myself by any of these pictures and energy, but can move within a point of self will, walking moment to moment, and realize that who I am within this process is in self creation as I redefine and recreate myself as the living word discipline.

I commit myself to let go of the pictures in my mind of what I need to be like and focus on moving myself here through the challenges with physical will power.

I commit myself to let go of the pictures in my mind of what I need to be like instead of moving here breath by breath and creating who I am based on the moment and what is needed to live in my highest potential.

I commit myself to push myself beyond my resistances and move into disciplined living.


The next point I am seeing is living in the past, where I desire to be able to sleep in and have it like it was with no worries or cares, indulging in the satisfaction of sleeping to my desire is filled, this I will walk self forgiveness on:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a desire of being able to live how it use to be, where I was ignorant and in that in bliss, not having to take responsibility and stand within a way of integrity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a belief that it was better in the past when I could sleep in and not have a care in the world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to have the life I once had were I could sleep all I wanted, get up and do nothing I wanted, without any consideration or care as to the effect I am having on my own well being and that of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into hope, hoping I can just live how I once have and just let things be easy and simply.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the past where I wasn’t taking responsibility for myself was simple and easy, when I see, realize, and understand that I wasn’t doing what I could be and living in a way that is detrimental to others and myself by existing in separation and limitation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to access this desire of hope where I want to soak up in this feeling of comfort, peace, and serenity as I remember what it is like to lie in the comfort of my bed in the escape of sleep.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself with this feeling of desire and peace in thinking about sleep, when I am ignoring the fact that it cause the mind to permeate deeper into the physical and is in the background slowly killing life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to slowly kill life due to the feelings I am generating through the thoughts of comfort and peace within my mind as thoughts of sleeping, when I see, realize, and understand that this is not real, this is a point of self abdication to stand within my own self responsibility, and do whatever it takes to align myself with what is best and stand equal and one with life here as breath.

When and as I see I am going into this energy based memory of sleeping in the past, where the feelings of comfort, peace, and serenity comes up, I stop and breath, and realize that this is a distraction and abdication of myself as life in the fact that I am responsible to stand within equality with the physical and stop allowing the mind to take over and direct me here.

I commit to breath through these desires to have the feelings of what it was like in the past where I could sleep and do whatever I wanted in ignorance.

I commit myself to ground myself in the word what is best, life, and here as physical.

I commit myself to be disciplined in the morning and wake up after 4-6 hours of sleep so I rest the body and stop the mind from integrating more.

Next blog, I will walk the redefined word of discipline and start walking a process with waking up early to more set in stone the way forward with this example.

 More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

My Process So Far of Living Words – Day 518

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I have been walking the process of living words for a bit of time now, I can’t put a number on it, but actively I have been walking it for the past many months. This actually is something that I have been doing for most of my life, living words, but not in a way of actively directing myself within it and making decisions as to when and how I will live words, it has more been automatic in what seemingly came natural to me or what I was good at. So let me start with sharing what living words means, this is when you decide to first find a pattern in your life that you want to change, for instance, becoming more disciplined. To live this word, first it is important to investigate all the scenarios of the word that you can see so you can understand yourself within it, though you will also be discovering and uncovering new ways to live the word as you go on living your life, so this process is ongoing one. It is quite something because you are creating yourself, expand more and more of yourself into and as your world.

I will walk a living word process with the word discipline to support with showing why I live words as well as how to do this, this always to expand myself and support myself to be better, and this always to create a world that is best for all. My goal is life and living in a way that is my highest potential and showing everyone else that we all can do this as well. Imagine a world where every human being is living there words in a way that is their highest potential, and they realize this is possible because they are in fact doing it themselves. So lots of potential we have, and this process I have found supports with living that out for each one who ventures into it, living words is a way to self create.

Within the word discipline there are areas in my life where I was already living this, in my work and also in my responsibilities towards others day to day, so I am living this word in some areas so I recognized in my life what this looks like in these specific scenarios. This is where I mentioned earlier that you will discover that many words are already being lived by yourself, we are living words anyway, what we think will eventually be lived. So it’s important it from self and based on a direct understanding of who you are within it. In this process, there is an emphasis on living words that will support with changing self to be my highest potential. This goal will eventually create a better version of who I am as I expand myself more and more in living words, such as the word discipline that I am going to expand myself within through this very process I am writing out. I have had trouble being disciplined when it comes to waking up in the morning and getting tasks done before work, this is something that I have been wanting to do, but I have been allowing the addiction to sleep sway me from living my potential in this area and be more productive during my early morning.

In this scenario with expanding myself in the area of my life where I am not disciplined in, getting out of bed early and getting tasks done before work, I will have to create and expand myself in the living of this word in this scenario. Here redefining the word is supportive, something that not many do I would say and within this process of redefining words, I use self forgiveness and self corrective statements to better understand the different dimensions of myself I have attached to the word discipline. For instance, I have attached the emotion of anxiety to the word discipline because I have a fear that I will not live up to this word and what I am desiring to be disciplined in, and so will fail. This causing me anxiety as I have assessed myself as someone who is able to be strong and move through all challenges, if I do not stand within the word discipline and do what it is I am wanting to do, but slack off and sleep in, I will have proven to myself that I am not disciplined and so this is something I resist showing to myself.

So as you see within investigating for just a moment, I have already uncovered three dimensions of this word discipline that is causing me to resist and so not push myself to in fact move out of the pattern of sleeping in and becoming productive before the work day starts.

In my next blog I will walk through the next step I have been doing in the processing of living words, through investigating the word within me and understanding who I am in relation to it, walking self forgiveness and self correction to live within this word, and then redefining the word to live in my life and beyond. I will be on the self forgiveness and self correction to the word discipline in the few dimensions that I spoke on above, thanks for reading and see you tomorrow.

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Automatic Behavior - How to Stop it from Limiting You - Day 512

What is behind the responses that become automatic, where it feels like we don't even think about what we are doing never mind actually consider if it is practical or best for us? What causes such a response and how can each one practice ways to become more responsive to one's environment in a way where we give direction that will support us to be better or best. Check out more in the audio recording. Thanks

Self Supportive Material - 
http://www.Eqafe.com 

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com 

Forum support: 
http://forum.desteni.org 

Desteni Wiki: 
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page 

Eqafe Facebook Page: 
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136... 

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ... 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Acceptance and Work: Dissecting the “I don’t want to” Character - Day 510

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I have taken on a new position in my job where it wasn’t a direct decision by myself where I had time to consider all the points and find what best suited me, I was more thrown into the position by unforeseen and unfortunate events. With that being said, I am now in a position of leadership and responsibility where I have to sharpen my skills and face fears and illusions I have created for myself. One of the points that has been coming up lately and has been effecting my work flow and environment is this nagging backchat that ‘I don’t want all this responsibility, I don’t want to be in charge of all this, I don’t want to be stressed about money and problems that arise day in and day out, I want to be free and do what I want’, then my mind will go into pictures of how others are getting to have an easier time, get to have fun and be worry free, I want that life again, I don’t want all this responsibility.

Though I realize that I have to change this pattern because I have decided to walk this path and ensure I do my best at it. So I will walk some forgiveness and create some ways forward for myself to find solutions for the points that I am facing within this character.

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a character of the ‘I don’t want to’ do what I have in front of me to do because of beliefs that it’s too hard and too much, not seeing that I am creating an experience of it as too much and too hard because of the personality I am going in of not wanting to do something with the energy of resistance and tiredness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the character of ‘I don’t want to’ based on the belief that I am not able to when I see, realize, and understand I am able to that its more a lack of effort to do what has to be done because I have created a polarized reality of what is good and what is based through comparison with other people in my world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to have my life be smooth and comfortable at all times where I don’t have stress or points that are challenging because within that I have created the perception that this is what I want.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blind me from the realization within the actually facing challenges and pushing myself within them to find solutions and ways forward, I grow and expand and this is when I am most empowered as I am able to be more purposeful within what I do and create more of who I am through the challenges I face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed pictures and thoughts of how good it is over there in the easy life where I see comfort and fun, when I see, realize, and understand each one is equally facing challenges within there lives and that life is not about what you do or where you are, but more who you are within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to miss the face that I am where I am and I have the responsibilities I have, though I can accept this and walk within the realization that these challenges will support with my growth and expansion, and empower me to be more and more the person I really am as my potential in this life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create blame and reaction to others in  my reality for frustrations I am having toward myself for not moving into the challenges in acceptance and walking who I am within them as a creation process and opportunity to live my utmost potential within it.

When and as I am seeing myself go into the ‘I don’t want to’ character and start blaming and going into daydreams about how great life is over there, I stop and breathe, and realize that I am responsible for who I am within my life circumstances and I can change myself to accept this and live these opportunities to the best of my ability and make them something worthwhile that is best for me and all.

I commit myself to live the word acceptance when I see I am going into blame or reactive thoughts as I see I decide to walk this point and that I am responsible for who I create myself.

I commit myself to walk solutions that are substantial to support myself and all involved in a way that supports all to be there best by walking with them, understanding them, and finding ways to support there strengths and strengthen their weaknesses as I walk for myself.

I commit myself to live the word accept – stand where I accept what is here as it is and move into directing myself to live my highest potential and bring the best out of what I am walking within myself and within others.

I commit myself to push myself in challenges where I move into solutions and let go of the desire to resist and give up.

Really cool Support Hangout on the Word Work and what that means:

Redefining Work 

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

"Spoiled Child" Character and Solution - Day 506

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I am starting a business series and facing points that come up when I am in business settings and relationships.

First point I am going to write on is the fear of failing as the first fear that comes up and triggers when I see, realize, and understand that a point in my life is not working or something happened that is challenging. The fear moves through my whole body and becomes like a fire that is raging through me and I need some sort of outlet to release it or it feels like I may explode. This sort of like a spoiled child who doesn't yet know how to deal with the environment stimulus they are experiencing and the relationships within that environment, they scream and yell and become destructive, not a good scene all around.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into fear when I hear that something in the business is going bad or is creating a challenge to be faced in real time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go to the worst case scenario without seeing, realizing, or considering the outflows and solutions that can be created even in the worst of cases as I see, realize, and understand there is always solutions if one stay motivated, driven, and creative to find them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in this fear and accept and allow the thoughts to move through me that the business is going to lose money or we are going to lose customers or we are not going to be able to stay in business, and fear the livelihood and survival of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the survival of myself within my mind through fear being triggered instead of taking a breath, a step back, slowing down, and realizing that there is a grounding needed by myself to see the situation clearly and get all the facts to then be able to create a solution or support with this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush into assumptions about what the facts are and listen to my mind telling me what the facts are before I have even taken a breath and looked and considered the whole situation or occurrence before making any decision or movement on the matter.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for what has occurred based on thoughts going on in my mind in reaction to the initial thoughts of the business going down, and thus blame them through my words and actions of calling them out and chastising them for events that are not related and thus are not necessarily any fault of theirs. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become like a spoiled child who should be listened too and considered and able to just release all my emotions so I am feeling clear and better, not considering or taking responsibility for the outflows my actions and behaviors have on others in my environment and how I am creating more of a destructive environment rather then a supportive expansive one. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to news in energy and emotion rather then breathing, slowing down, and assessing the information in a calm manner that is supportive for the problem, the solution, the people involved, and for my own self responsibility to become a leader in what is best for all rather then a dictator who is tyrannical and nasty.

When and as I see I am going into this rush of fear when I move from a shock experience of something happening in my environment, I stop and breath and realize that at this time I need to take a step back, ground myself in my body through breath, slow down, look and understand all the facts involved, and assess what changes/solutions are needed to correct the point and make changes that will support what is best for all.

I commit myself to live the word slow down and breath when the shock comes of an event that is challenging and/or difficult in my life.

I commit myself to fact find before I take any course of action within the matter.

I commit myself to stand as a support and example for others to understand the mistake made and find solutions to correct the mistake and circumvent it happening again.

I commit myself to use common sense in business matters and do what is best for all within my dealings with business matters, business relationships, and business solutions.

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Soul - School of Ultimate Living

https://www.schoolofultimateliving.com