A Lady's Journey to Life: Why Am I Continuing to Fall

Recently a point came up about an addiction that I have been transcending and within it I fell. What I realized within this fall was how I up until the point of actually doing the action that caused me to fall I was in a point of ignorance, like ‘I know I shouldn’t be doing this, I know there will be consequences for doing this action, I know I will be harming others if I do this”, though I still did it, even though I realized that it is not best for all. So after this event happened I listened to the new kryon interview – Rest and the Physical - Kryon: My Existential History, where he spoke about sleep and how the body does not need rest. How we within our physical bodies could live significantly longer then we are currently living. How we are in fact devolving each decade, each year, each day, each breath, and when he finished discussing this point I reflected on myself, and saw that very day I decided to go into ignorance and fulfill my mind desire, my need, my instant gratification, rather then stopping myself in principles that I have committed to live in what is best for all.

So my blog today is about what is it within my decision to fall even though I know it’ll be self compromising, why I did it anyway. What I found initally was a spitefulness, that because of my life circumstances I am afraid to take on inevitably the horror that I as a being have particpated within. The act of not living my highest potential is a measure in reality that is created, now because of spite and ignorance, I am accepting and allowing myself to give up and give in to challanges that arise and so compromise my self standing. I have committed myself to stand always despite falls, set backs, miss-takes, and abdication of my responsibility, I will stand up again and move myself to the inevitable correction to align myself with what is best for all.

So within this fall, there are two basic options I can walk and we all can walk for that matter, in a day, in our lives, is to stay in the fall experience of self pity, self anger, resentment, and blame or we can take self responsibility, learn from the fall, and use what I learned to change myself to be better equipped for the next time to stand, to stop the self compromise, to stop the projection and blame onto the outer reality, and to realize that everything that is in fact happening in MY life is MY creation.

This is one of the realization that came up for me within this point, is that I am the creator of my life, I decide whether I fall on a point or whether I stand within it and move into the correction to live what is best for all. There is no one outside of myself that is able to walk this decision and action, there is support yes, though in this journey of birthing life from the physical I am alone in this decision. I decided for myself who I will be and so within this I am the creator of my eventual desteni that’ll play out. What I walk in this life, each and every moment will accumulate to the final point of either death or birthing into life. This is the reality of each one in this life and the more that is given the more responsibility one takes on.

So from this fall, I take it as an opportunity to learn and understand where I stand within myself. How within this learning opportunity I need to change and move into a position where I can stand through the programs of the mind that played out for me to eventually fall on my commitments. Walking moment to moment I found, this journey is more manageable, to in each moment walk what is best for all this through breath awareness, this is also a process to get to this point, though in breath, here in our physical bodies, is where this life is able to be lived/walked in what is best. So a goal set forth to focus on or live is instead of having too much to consider in many moments as I decide to act on something, bring those many moments down to the small, walking and living moment to moment walking what is best in each moment that is here. (I will also write blogs on redefining the word here, moment to moment, breath, so it’s more clear on how to live this in physical reality)

This is what I found most important is to realize that I am responsible for not only myself, but for all here, I am walking for those who are not able to, for those who are starving, for those who are hurt and abused, for those who are silenced due to oppression, for those who have no voice, and also for those who are so lost in there minds that they can not see what is best for all. We, each and everyone of us, are walking a process of living what is best for all, this process though I have realized is determined and defined by self, and as was mentioned in Kryon’s interview today, there is a time stamp, life itself is showing within the aging process that we are devolving, we are not living and aligning with life, and so we are in essence dying which is obviously life extinguished. Life never dies to be clear, though the mind does, the mind is energy and this energy is based from the physical substance of the physical body, it’s parasitic in nature and so it eats the physical body until we die and the physical substance as our body repels the mind, the mind ceases to exist and physical substance goes back to it’s source, the earth, dust to dust. There have been hundreds of interviews on the life processes of human beings and what happens at death, here is a series specifically on this, the life reviews of those who die and processes that happen at death.

What I have realized within this fall for myself is that within my every day life, I have to live the words assertive, self trust, self honesty, and self creation to be able to in the moments I want to give into the justification, excuses, breaks, and really bullshit to live these words and push through my resistances and that I have to in real time move myself physically in these moments. These little moments of thoughts such as ‘it’s ok if I just indulge for one day’, ‘it’s ok if I take a break for one hour’, ‘it’s ok if I judge and ridicule in my mind for this one time cause it’s not that big of a deal, they can’t see, no one can see but me’, though these little moments eventually accumulate into physical action where I go into a decision in the physical to compromise myself, my commitments that I have made, and so compromise the whole process of birthing life from the physical. If I did act in a way that is best for all in that moment, I would not have wasted this time now of two days where I could be walking in ways that is best.

So there is purpose to falls they are neither good nor bad, but a opportunity to show you to you and how you have created yourself, what within this fall I have just lived, where I need to stand more, where I need to assert my directive will more, what I need to change and push within my skill set to be able to counteract my desire to resist, it is a learning experience if I walk it into a completion. Falls in process require self honesty, this is an act of self will and who one is within this process of a fall. This is all up to me, though the seriousness of what I am walking I am realizing more and more, we are not just walking this for ourselves, we are walking the process of birthing life from the physical for all beings that are here living, this is the desteni of this earth, I decide who I am and this effects the all cause we are all interconnected, everything is one and equal here in this physical reality.

I will continue with self forgiveness and self commitments in my next blog to further move into the correction process that is needed to stand within moments of self compromise.

Thank you for reading.