My Journey to Life: addictions

Showing posts with label addictions. Show all posts

Sunday, October 12, 2025

Day 31 - Desires are everywhere - Process Support and SF

More on desire, desire is a tantalizing energy, I understand it as a movement within a moment of thinking where the thinking has a force to it, like pulling, and in this pulling, there is much behind it, many thoughts of what ifs, what could be, how I can get this or that, and in this there is the point of self decision to stand or fall into the mind of this outplay. I am seeing that this decision of stand, stand, stand is a consistent constant decision within self, as well as a point of self direction that equally has to be decided upon, self decide, self decide, self decide, and in this one come to the principle of self responsibility to live and align with what is best for all life. The longer this self process takes, the longer this will take for all life, that is the consequence, and depending on what self decide, this will be lived out in self’s living reality.

I was gifted with some sound understanding yesterday, saying that the ripples will be created based on one’s decision, based on how one decide, this will and can go on for years to come. In the moments, the desire can be so strong, so impending, and so intoxicating that self believe that I just have to indulge. I have learned over time that the decision is key, to stop, and find a way that is best for all life. This I find means to work with self, locally, in what self can stand within and align to life in what is best. Getting strong and stable in the small moments, which will support in the bigger more intense moments,.

One of the main desires I had was in relationship, desiring to be with a being that had power and also desiring to match that being and be strong, powerful, and in that desiring the ‘goods’ that go with it, wealth, status, freedom, and praise. The design of it I am seeing to support me in the structure of the day to day life where I will face and do face these points again, is the positive and negative cycle, seeking something outside myself to fulfill me, and in this creating the oppositie lack where In I am saying to myself as life, I am lost, I don’t know who I am, and thus I am going to create in separation and harm due to this idea and living within the mind. The mind being that which is creating that force, the energy of desire, and in this I am one and equal, I am this mind, I am the desires, and I am the one living them out.

Working with the living words process, I am seeing that I actually have to do this for myself, I am not going to have any strong and powerful being as my perfect partner show me the way, and I am not just going to magically become such a being, as I understand that doesn’t really exist. No one and no thing is more powerful then the least among us, meaning the weakest which if one is not able to stand in that moment and support life to be best for all, then the point of suffering will continue. This is really the point, ending suffering of all kinds, through the actions of self stand through what is best for all, and stand until this point is done. I am realizing, it does not mean suffering will end, but that there is a process of self to walk until the suffering does end for all, then the suffering will end for self.

Those with the courage to stand and continue to walk self forgiveness, self change, and what is best for all in one and equal value of life, will support those to walk the same path, and then this will continue until all is equal and one through and through.

There is no short cut, no cheat code, no special treatment, and I find when I desire this, flag it, forgive myself for these desire, and find the path that is self honest and will in fact support myself to life, to my best, and the best of all. I am using living words like patience, recognizing the essence in myself as life and that of all who I meet, I am working with the words self forgiveness, where I forgive myself and ask forgiveness where necessary to support with mending the paths I have created from my past as a point of self correction to then in fact be able to create new potentials. I see that life has many such opportunities , and to not give up on self, on life here as all, and especially on the point that life is here, life will prevail always, and self is life as all as one as equal. Breathing! Yes, this is a key to work through the desires and energies, and as the storm passes, self see more clear, the energy dies down, and what remain is nature, this world, the beings, and self - we/i will always remain, best i have found to be self honest, stand with integrity and humbleness, and breathe through the storms as well as the calm, self remain as life remain and so we are here. Until we are complete and whole, and can create in a way where the suffering truly ends and we have found self, always here and always aware.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be special, to have a powerful partner, and to equalize myself with the partners power as an example.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be powerful, to have wealth, resources, praise, and freedom within the system of being seen and heard as a point of worship.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be worshiped, to desire to be idolized, to have people want to be me and thus validate who i am within myself as someone that is worthy, cool, special, powerful, and influential.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as flawed, as a mistake, as someone with no worth or value to contribute.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i am not worthy, that i have no way to be able to walk a point of integrity and real value that’ll do anything significant to support real change in this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted nad allowed myself to rether escape into desire as entertainment, highs, fantasies and beliefs of gifts from life i will be given if i just get this done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be given gifts from life, in the belief that life will take care of me cause i am special, i am good, i am a kind person, and thus abdicate myself self responsibility to live here within and as the alignment of what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hope for a savior, hope for someone or something to show me the way through this mess of a world and self, instead of seeing realizing nad understanding i actually am creating such mess and thus i have to change myself to in fact align with the solution to support with real solutions that are best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be saved, to have Jesus see me as special, and thus believe in that thought that I will be saved if i am seen by another being who exemplifies life as someone who is special, good, and walking well.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to seek praise due to the desire to be seen as more then because within myself i judge myself as less.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the belief that i am not good or smart due to the memories of being bullied. I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge the bullies as mean and nasty, instead of seeing that within the bullying actions it shows a lack of awareness within the understanding of who self is as one and equal with all. I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not stand within the shoes of others and work with self honest assessment to share and care if i see a door is open to or let go and find another moment where a supportive point can get through, ensuring that i am clear and here and not reacting in any way.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to react to others bullying me and thus bully others to make myself feel more.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have lack within myself in any way what so ever, and thus give up when change is here for self to fulfill in what is best for all.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from others in blame, and in this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not become mature within the process of self honesty and self correction, where i stand within and as the solution until the solution of life manifest and do what is necessary to see this point through.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not recognize within myself when i do in fact stand and walk within integrity, seeing myself in a wholesome and fulfilled way to ensure i am here and clear with who i am, neither lacking or desiring, but breathing and directing myself in each moment in what is best for all.

I commit myself to breathe through any and all reactions and desires within myself, gain awareness of myself, and direct myself in a way of self responsible self care through what is in fact a way forward that i see in those moments in common sense best i am able to that will support all involved.

I commit myself to walk away and let go of the moment if i see i am not stable and require more self investigation and self change, removing rather then reacting and creating more living consequence that is not best for all.

I commit myself to also stand and breathe in the moments where i am challenged to ensure i am in fact self honest and self correcting myself in ways that will support myself to be able to support life here.

I commit myself to continue to apply myself in daily habits that are life giving and self honest to respond to my reality in a way that is in fact best for all until the alignment is here in the physical.

More support at -

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

wiki.desteni.org

equalmoney.org

Self Perfected - Destonian network support on fb

www.techno-tutor.com - word as living support, check out this tool!

Saturday, November 26, 2016

How I Stop Addictions with the Desteni I Process - Day 535

Here I discuss how I have been assisted and lived the tools of the desteni I process for myself where I stopped a number of addictions in my life. Have a listen and give yourself this gift of support for yourself to so we can all direct ourselves to our highest potentials. This to support a world that is best for all and stand as a steward of the earth for all who are here and yet to come. For more information on the tools and understanding more how to apply them, check out the links.

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material -
www.Eqafe.com

Forum support:
www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Monday, November 21, 2016

Self Empowerment and the Desteni I Process - Day 533

Here I discuss my process of understanding and living these words, self empowerment, in my life. And how it transformed my awareness of myself and my state of being to be one of confidence and determination to walk what is best for myself and all life. This is part of the desteni i process tools which has helped me immensely learn how to live in this way. Thanks for listening.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

Living In Ignorance, Is There a Gift? Day 499

Photo Source

To continue with my last blog, I wrote on the point of how through ignorance of my actions I fell on a commitment I had made and lived for quite some time, and within this ignorance, I am seeing through support of others and my own self introspection I am making this fall more then what it really is. I have attached emotions and thinking to this fall to blow it out of proportion and as well accumulate it with energy, which will further extend until I release it through some abusive way. Because when I am not directing myself in my mind as the thoughts and emotions that come, I require to move through it simply by breathing and remaining physical and practical with what is here in my current life circumstance.

What I do know and have proven to myself is that I am able to learn and grow from my falls and push myself to do better next time it comes up. To beat myself up over it actually takes more energy and exhausts me more.

So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become ignorant based on what and how I am doing what and how I am doing in my world without consideration of others and myself in what I have committed in word and so did not live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a point of self abuse based on what I do in a moment not seeing, realizing, and understanding that within a fall there is a key or gift I can take with me and learn from always so I can be more equipped and skilled to take the point on the next go around and stand my ground and live my words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into an ignorance about what I am doing where I will go into a blankness and a postitive energy veil where I believe that I am ok and doing fine while I am deliberately going against my word due to the desires that I have built up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to build up desires, wants, and needs about a particular action in reality believing I need it more then anything and that I will not be able to get it anywhere else but within this experience.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can only get a specific experience of freedom and fun and physical enjoyment through this particular substance and so believe that I am really enjoying myself when in fact it is just a mind simulation of these words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live freedom, fun, and enjoyment through a substance because I fear that I will never be able to get this myself due to beliefs that I am not good enough and not capable enough to live these words for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can’t live these words fun, freedom, and physical enjoyment due to the belief that I am not good enough and not patient enough to live this in my day to day living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become frustrated with myself because I have not been able to live the word patiences when in reality I have not lived nearly the 10000 hours it takes to master a specific skill one sets out to accomplish.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stop trying and pushing myself due to a belief that I am not patient enough and I will never be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I will never be patient enough when in reality it is a matter of breath awareness and perseverance to see a task through and self direction to do what is best in each moment which I have proven to myself I can do.

I commit myself to let go of the act of ignorance within what I do and align myself life and living to living my words and standing with integrity in what is best for all.

I commit myself to redefine the words fun, freedom, physical enjoyment, patience’s and perseverance to stand in these words and direct myself in my world to live them.

I commit myself to stop beliefs within emotional thought patterns of fear and self abuse and transform it into the living of the word acceptance, self achievement, and reality based living through breath.

I commit myself to walk the 10000 hours to master living words process in what I speak and live and so live my highest potential in this life.