Day 28 - Allowing Self to Flow - The Hips - Resisting what is here

equalmoney.org

So from working through the points with my gut, and working with trusting myself, I am moving on to the hips, where i am finding them to have gained some weight, and also have some pain in the left side. This pain is in the joint area where it feels as if it has been over worked or over used, compensating for the imbalance of my walk where I tend to put more weight on my left side when walking. So some words to work with here is overcompensating, inflexibility, immobile, constriction, and imbalance. 

I am seeing that due to my relationships in the past and my own self relationship with myself, I have allowed myself to become more left side dominant then right side, causing those muscles to be over used and over worked causing pain and discomfort. The weight gain i am seieng due to staying stuck in the past, not moving myself here in the physical through staying stuck in my mistakes i allowed and in this the expressions of self that i didn't live into. This resistance i am seeing of facing my past and what i have allowed in relationships for instance with others and myself, i am over compensating within my day to day activities, pushing beyond my flexibility and capacity where i want to do something, but i have not allowed my body and self discipline to catch up with the potential i am seeing. Not stretching for instance, spending the extra time to warm up before i go into the critical exercise and heavy tax on my body/self, but just move through the pain and discomfort, even though it is causing potential damage. This a lack of self awareness and self discipline, and essentially being lazy, giving up on my best.  

 Within my relationships, this is staying in a relationship or moving out of a relationship due to the thoughts of something is wrong or all is good, not working step by step with the physical and the reality feedback, but wanting it to be the way that suits me best for my interest. Lacking self honesty when in fact i require it to ensure that i am not fucking myself or another, and not allowing or accepting any abuse within my reality/self space. If i am allowing this in my world, then i am allowing it in others worlds as well, maybe not deliberately directly, but subtle it is playing out until eventually it comes to a head and all hell breaks lose and energy outbursts is created.  

Self forgiveness

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to resist the patience and stability as self discipline it'll take to walk the step by step process in the physical to walk the alignment of ensuring the steps are taken i can see that will support myself to be the best i can be and ensure the consideration of all involved is well aligned and understood so all benefit as best possible not matter the effort it'll take as long as what is best and common sense is considered.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into a desire to take it easy and work with my desires, where i can give into my wants and perceived needs within the idea that i am good, i can do it another time.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that time is something that i have to use with as i please, when i see, realize, and understand that everything has a consequence and everything is existing within space time and in my desires/ wants/ needs i am truly only considering myself and my small circle as my local environment not considering all life within the principles that i live within as it is in self interest only and not what is best for all. 

 I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be desiring to get my own way and in this not listen to common sense, but only listen to my mind as self interest reasoning that i can do what i want or i can get what i want and in that push beyond the consideration of all, and push to get my needs met above others.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame others within my reality about what has transpired in my world, where i seek out the point of desiring the punishment to go onto them as i believe i was done onto and in this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i was justified to harm others within my force of self onto others where i got my own way and punished others and in this believed that i won, when i see, realize, and understand no one wins. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful within and as my reality, where i go into blame and anger toward the injustices of others as i believe, instead of taking self responsibility for what i have created and finding the will to live something new that is aligned to others/all and live this change until it is done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become lazy and apathetic within and as the movement of self to do what is necessary to be done to ensure a world that is best for all as i start with myself within self discipline and self honesty to forgive myself for my past, and walk a change process that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not have compassion within and as others and myself as a point of walking the change process as it takes time and ensuring that application of breathe awareness and constant alignment with what is best as what is best for self is live within my day to day living, letting go of the want desire of self interest and considering in common sense what i can do that is best for all involved. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful and angry when i do not get my way as i see my life then will be more difficult.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear being and living life more difficult instead of walking my consequence no matter what it is and aligning myself to the solutions that is best for all life. 

I forgive msyelf to be in flexible within and as change when change is necessary to direct and correct myself to what is best and what will ensure i am able to do what is best in my living as this in fact is the only way of life that matters and is truly what i would want for myself and in all shoes if i had to live in them.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to resist my past instead of accepting my past as myself, forgive it as myself, and change myself to align here with what is best for all as living words and living solutions to the best of my ability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the signs of imbalance within my body, prioritizing performance or outcomes over presence and care.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to equate pain with progress, instead of seeing that pain is my body’s voice asking for care, realignment, and change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush my process out of fear of not being enough, instead of trusting the timing of my realignment as breath by breath, here.

When and as I see myself wanting to push through pain or discomfort without listening to my body, I stop and I breathe. I remind myself that my body is not a machine to conquer, but a living being I am here to walk with in partnership.

When and as I resist slowing down or preparing properly (emotionally or physically), I realize I am sabotaging my own potential. I choose preparation and structure over rush and self-interest.

When and as I go into guilt or regret about my past mistakes in relationships, I stop. I breathe. I remind myself that I am not defined by the past, but by who I choose to be in this breath forward.

I commit myself to let go of the desire in self interest to get what i want, and align myself in thought word and deed to what is best for all with my money, my awareness, my time, my energy as i see this is truly the world i would like to create and raise children in.

I commit myself to never give up on myself as all life within the acceptance of what is here and taking full self responsibility to walk my talk in common sense to do what i am able in the space i have to align life to what is best for all through equality and oneness and what is best for all.

I commit myself to stand in self discipline and consistency as i change myself to self interest only to what is best for all as would be best for me proven in my living, and tracking it in my day to day operations.

I commit myself to listen to my physical body more, i commit myself to live the word gentleness where i care for myself and my physical that has been pushed beyond limits at time and requires compassion as self here. 

I commit myself to remain stead fast in my principles of life as self forgiveness, accepting myself for who i am and changing myself step by step as i let go of the past through self forgiveness and changing through living words that will ensure i am living the best version of myself within a consistent application and growth. Also i commit myself to get up from each fall, and stand as life until all life is free as i have freed myself here as breathe. 

More support at -
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com
wiki.desteni.org
equalmoney.org
Self Perfected - Destonian network support on fb
www.techno-tutor.com - word as living support, check out this tool!

—Children’s eyes—

Situations come and go, but self always remain, death due us part where life comes to say, who stand in honor, those who have stood the test of time to rebirth for the children to come in joy as divine. 

The children of this world, oh how ive fell short. They deserve better, they deserve the best, but self interest comes and takes it’s girth, consuming to consume and fill selfs belly in spite. 

Sucking dry the human in shame, as i hang my head low i can’t bear what remains. Remains of me after such atrocious visions, children starve on our televisions, how can we live in such a world as this. 

There will be a day where life takes its keep, the children will remain and be free that is for sure, as it should be, without this mighty gore. 

The human who do not stand as life, that is what must be eradicated, the mind demons, we all have it, it is not hidden. 

Self forgiveness with self honesty will surely help us rise, to again be able to face our children in the eyes. Doing our best for all as what is life’s measure in equality and oneness, its greater then any mind treasure. Fear not as thats useless and cause fret and horror, be brave and stand firm, it will one day be over.

A Hope - Day 9

a hope -

 a hope is a dream that will never manifest 

don't' hope but live as this is one's resonance 

the resonance is the core of self in a sound environment 

life is the breathe that give one value here 

don't waste this breathe as it's the key to eternal bestowment 

i stand as one among many who are all that's meant 

meant for life living, but we're(Self) not there yet

don't give up, don't give in, persevere young student, you can sit when you stand!

#skilife

Physical Life/Self - What I have Learned through Desteni and Eqafe - Day 597

I listened recently to the ants interviews on eqafe.com, the ants come through the portal at desteni and discuss about how they are operating currently in a survival type enviroment, they themselves are not seeking survival means, though they had a lot to say about human consciousness effect on the enviroment. This I will continue in my next blogs.

Consciousness of the Ant - 

Part 1 on Eqafe.com

First though, I'd like to discuss a bit about the difference between the physical/natural world and the human mind/consciousness, this to the best of my ability based on what I have studied of the subject with desteni for the last 11 plus years and within my own personal journey within many sources the past 17 years, so it's been a lot of my life. I am no expert, but I have been studying diligently, and the main point I have found that cause a disruption between the natural physical world and the human being is the fact that there is a lack of connection from the human mind/consciousness we are particpating in and this physical existence as life source. As we look around us, there is a distinctive difference between the natural world and human being's system world, I would say it's more undeniably clear then not and I am seeing many would agree with me on this, humans world is distinct amongst all life here. The buildings made of concrete, the structures as boxes we live in, the boxes we move around in, and the boxes we locate in throughout the day and into our personal living spaces (if we are lucky and have money).

Otherwise, you are in the wild/natural world, this world though is beautiful and magnificent in it's creational wonders and mysteries as gifts of the ever pulse of life itself, our wild/natural world on this planet has become brutal. Survival is the functioning mechanism at the moment of our natural world as human's in our quest for consumption have degraded a lot of the natural order and laws of this physical world. This due to the fact that human's haven't realized and thus forgot who we are, part of the natural world, one and equal, and thus do in fact have the ability to live this as ourselves and amongst the natural world in peace and co-habitation simply by living the natural order and law of all of existence - treat all life as how you would like to be treated, give before you receive and thus no want as you will be fulfilled, and all life is one and equal and thus all life is only ever in consideration in what is best for all.

Human beings have lost that connection with ourselves as our life force/source by particpating in the mind consciousness system - thinking and reacting, and thus fell from grace and lost our connection with ourselves as life itself. The key is taking self responsibility for self in this moment, and finding the will within self to understand who one is as the mind/consciousness and your current behavior that is causing harm to yourself and so others, and changing it within self first. Proving that who you are to all life as all life is aware, that you will no longer cause harm and will in fact be part of the solution to the best of your ability, and live that.

So as a human being, the mind as our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are a source point for the mind system machine inside us all and sucking dry the physical life source and thus our physical body until one day we die cause the body could no longer handle the stress and damage the mind was having on it. The body dies in doing it's utmost to live, the being within as the self is in shame and regret and will face oneself to the fullest degree in the afterlife. As Bernard spoke many times, this is our last life and there is consequence. The mind is a programmed system from within the  interdimenionsal existence of ourselves which is our inner worlds, and is being powered by our very act of thinking in our heads, this is not to become afraid, but to understand the circumstances we find ourselves in because there is always solutions to this, the solution has been lived and is being taught through the #desteni networks, #earthhaven, and eqafe.com platforms.

This has been discussed throughout the eqafe and desteni material, through the portal and the participants who have expressed on topics of all parts of life and the mind consciousness system, thousands of videos, writings, and sharings on these points have been expressed over the last 15 years since the portal opened on youtube. There is a process of support and networks all ready to support you on this journey of self discovery and adventure, to eventually embrace the mind as self and use it as it was intended, a tool for self creation. Through the tools of self forgiveness and living the change that is best for all life, we can in fact start to restore the magnificence of self as a life being here and thus once again restore order on our beautiful home and mother earth and make peace with all the co-inhabitants of this earth. Peace is a different state of living and being, it takes many steps based on the state of where each human being is at and the extent of mind programming one has to walk through, though it is possible, as the impossible is simply the initial phase of the self creation process of i am possible.

So do not fear, but start the first step, this is where i started and each being does on there journey to self as life, there are resources and support teams out there to help, so connect with us/me on facebook and lets help/support each other in loving and caring way. It took many years for myself to get into a relatively stable self, I am able to use the tools of desteni as self forgiveness to stabilize myself and get to a baseline grounding point, and it is worth every tear, sweat, and suffering that came about in this journey. We are capable, we are self responsible, we can make this world a place where our children in all walks of life are free. It's time. Enjoy self always and keep a balance of mental rest/relaxation through giving this to your physical self/body. Also, connecting to animals and nature is also great support for self balance, I highly suggest. Take care and big hug.

Check out the weekly chats on destonian.com, they can be every day with the portal, or Monday, Fridays, and Saturday's for sure at 9pm SA time.
Looking forward to meeting you there.

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com - Beginner Course in Desteni I Process
http://www.eqafe.com - Library of Existence
www.destonians.com - Desteni Group Support Network
https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesteniUniverse/ - Desteni Group Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/WLthroughgarbseyes - My Personal DIP Sharing
http://www.desteni.org - Main Website
www.patreon.com/earthhaven - Life Community Building Network

Dolphins and Humans Can Be Friends - Earth Haven/Desteni Research - Day 596

Photo Source

I don't know if this is the case for these dolphins, but it's cool to get a glimpse for a moment of how inter species on this planet can interact and live co-habitually, for this to manifest and be created for real with humans specifically and nature's absolute magnificence and beauty, we as the human being, each single one of us, must take self responsibility for one's thoughts, words, and actions. Any thing less then this such as reaction as blame or pointing fingers or fighting cause outflows of abuse and thus is unacceptable, so as a solution that has supported me out of the abuse and unacceptable-ness of myself I found self forgiveness.

This helped me understand myself in my ill behavior that caused harm, and so find the correction within the self forgiveness and living change. I am only speaking this way because i have been living these tools for the past 10 plus years, i am not preaching or trying to put anything onto you, i am more sharing my experience of what worked for me.

We all i know want peace in our lands, with our neighbors, with all the creatures of this land, cause these creatures equally have to survive, have partners and friends they live there days with, have children, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and close confidants, we are all beings here animal, human, forest alike. Though we need to walk the manifested consequence of what we face as fear and realize we are here and we are capable to change ourselves and so change our reality, which in turn will help others have examples of change, and we can start tipping the scales to solution oriented living and loving each other as neighbors and helping each other whenever it is needed no matter what cause we know in the same position i would like someone to help and teach me.

Let's use this pandemic and isolation to get real with self, and take action. Move self in the moments we have been gifted on this planet earth, our home and lets make it a safe haven for all. It's possible, let animals become your friends, the one's you don't like, start investigating why you are reacting, get common sensical with it, spiders are tiny little creatures that for the most part are harmless, you can research different spiders when you see them and get to know there species, flicking something away like a spider who is actually a living being that feels pain and going back to your candy crush game is not cool in any way shape or form. Nature and animals are pure beings in many ways and will mirror back who you are with a grace and stability that is only awe inspiring to me.

Check out the links of life and self support below, and let's connect, much work to do, but lets start enjoying ourselves and this earth in the principles of life as what is best for all as best for self and start creating the world we want our children to be safe and loved and cared for by all no matter what. Thanks all.


www.lite.desteniiprocess.com - Beginner self forgiveness course




www.patreon.com/earthhaven - community building network built with life principles

              Artwork by: Gabriel Aceves Higareda

www.eqafe.com - library of existences

Shame - Part 2 - Living this as A Gateway to our Best Self - Day 595

The Awareness of the Eagle through the Portal at Eqafe

Continuation of Day 594 -
Shame - Part 1 - Living this as a statement of self correction through self forgiveness - Day 594

Through the experience of shame, this shame is when one do something in one's life that creates an outflow in one's behavior that cause harm and abuse in some way, and is in one's face, eventually when we do not in fact take self responsibility for our actions, these points of self compromise and regrettable actions will be lived out. We don't often consider or become aware of our shameful acts, I know before I was walking the desteni i process, I would not very much take note of the times where I did something to cause harm to another. And when I did, all i wanted to do was escape the event or the people and move onto something that made me feel good inside myself, though the shameful occurrence is a truth now and did in fact happen, this fact can't be denied forever. 

So it's not going to go away, it can be suppressed and buried within, but doesn't ever go away and thus will in turn happen again through time because I did not learn from the last event and I didn't do anything to change the outcome to be something different. Thus in this terrible game I play with myself, i not only weaken and harm my own self integrity and self core as a Living being among all other life and life forms that reside among me, I harm and weaken others around, which creates rippled outflows from beings they will touch and integrate with, and thus exponential abuse is created by my one single action to abdicate responsibility and live out my self irresponsibility to change who I am to be able to stand the outflow of what is best for all, thus why not just face the shame and change myself to be a better human being here now, what better opportunity then the one's life gifts to us as our self experiences day in and day out, breathe by breathe. 

At last, until I finally realized the power of self forgiveness and self will in the corrections of myself that is best for all in my self commitments statements, I did not realize the full and total impact my actions not only have on my mental, spiritual, and physical well being, but every other living thing I touch, which in fact is everything, cause self is one and equal to the physical and thus life itself within to the without. Shame I have found to see my false face and find the grace I was equally given by life itself, to give it another chance to see a better way and for me to take that opportunity and create something more and better for myself and so every being I will touch from that moment forward. So we have extraordinary impact in this life, for better or worse, this always defined and refined by self, and I highly suggest the desteni i process tools to work through who we are as shame and the outflows this creates. 

This the kind of commitment I found was required to walk through my shameful acts and really self investigate who I am within myself to in fact give myself the ability to change in the next moments it could occur again. A never giving up on self's ability to learn and change and a point of self willingness to push into unknown territory and suffering in ways, this when one finally face the shame of self and build up the self empowerment of proven living change to do better for oneself and others, you become a being who is not moved, can move self and direct self into eternal life by living and creating for oneself life to others as how you would want it best for yourself.

Also, a willingness to push oneself always beyond what one thought possible, this I found doesn't have to be an extreme type experience, but to in the moments that open up in your day to day life when you face a challenge, to walk through the fear and face the challenge....and build on this each and every day, to each and every moment it opens up in your world. I am not saying this is all you do all day long, no, just be aware of yourself in your day to day moments and start learning how you operate, the mechanics of self. So working with the moments that bring me shame and I started to become aware of these moments by actively taking self responsibility, I found the point of building oneself up over time, slow but sure, with consistency is the most efficient and effective way to just get it done. It's a slow process, but highly interactive and fascinating, and this i found the gift in living the word shame. 

Shame I have redefined as being ashamed - a- sham (false) - e (expression), so it's a false face I am putting on within myself to mask the real evil (= live in reverse) of who I am being and how I am living in moments with myself and so into moments with others in my actual physical everyday moments. Most of the abuse is in specific personality types I have accepted and allowed to live out, such as self inferiority, self righteousness, ego patterns, and much more, though it was patterned and over time I learned my self abusive patterns through the tools and practice daily of listening to eqafe.com, applying self forgiveness in writing and out loud, and commitment statements for myself through learning from writing each forgiveness statements I made. This so the next time I face this shame and stopping the compounding of abuse, I had a directive in my awareness that I spoke or wrote and was able to redirect my living into a way forward that is best for myself and so best for all I meet. So the shift happens in awareness from the mind disturbances to what and how can I change my physical living to be more efficient in my living mechanics of myself, the way I operate, and how my thoughts, words, and actions has a rippled exponential effect for better or worse. 

And I repeated this over and over until I was satisfied with my self honesty within myself in the process point I was practicing changing. I followed my gut and now recognize this as my self core, self honesty, inner voice, sanctuary that I have created within myself. This inner guide and self honesty support with how to move in my reality, what is best to do, how best can I support live, and where can i make a difference to be a better me, more efficient, more impactful is key to self creation i have found in a way that benefit all. 

The sky of life is the limit as far as I am concerned, and within the limits of life principle in what is best for all, certainly heaven on earth can be created by correcting the inner mechanics of self into the outer by common sense self sustainability in taking self responsibility for one's actions. Being ashamed is difficult yes, but I see it as a gift to my highest potential as motivation to move from what I know to be not who I really am into the being that I know i can be, the best of myself as I give myself to others the best I am able to and living this until its proven in the physical. 

Thanks for reading and please feel free to leave any comment or questions if you see fit.

Check out the weekly chats on destonian.com, they can be every day with the portal, or Monday, Fridays, and Saturday's for sure at 9pm SA time.
Looking forward to meeting you there.

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com - Beginner Course in Desteni I Process
http://www.eqafe.com - Library of Existence
www.destonians.com - Desteni Group Support Network
https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesteniUniverse/ - Desteni Group Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/WLthroughgarbseyes - My Personal DIP Sharing
http://www.desteni.org - Main Website
www.patreon.com/earthhaven - Life Community Building Network

The Child – Expression of Self as This - Series - Part 2

Photo Source

For Reference and context, the first part to this series:
The Child – Expression of Self as This - Series - Part 1

Continuing with the process of opening up and redefining the word child and adult for myself, and how I see it best to be lived in what would be best for all. I am reflecting on my own process of how I have come to understand this word and living of these words child and adult for myself based on who and how I have walked within the desteni I process that I have been diligently walking for the last 10 plus years. The desteni process I have found is important with supporting me with a foundation point to be able to indeed redefine this word child and adult to be child and wise child, because it’s the process I have found of the adult being birthed again as the child of existence and from there one walk into the ability to respond to reality directly and so learn the way of this physical world and reality, the laws, how it’s designed, engineered, and structured, and within this how to be able to stand in the stead of another and raise this other to be a wise child, holding onto the wondrous nature of the child in this world as well as harnessing and using to all’s benefit the understanding through experience to live in a way of harmony and symbiosis to support oneself as all as best possible, thus the adult birthing as the child of existence through the desteni of the universe which is the desteni i process becomes the child of existence and through time and space becomes and creates the wise child, which will be what self create as there legacy.

This all will be cyclical of course, so one will indeed individually walk the process of becoming the adult, which is the a dull in one’s location point as the adult’s in this world currently are living disconnected and void of the understanding and so example of giving the child they create into a being that honors life and so stands for solutions that are best for all. Now a days and in the past, we see that this world was not created in symbiosis, support for all, understanding of natural order, and doing what is best, we have lived mostly in survival, fear, brutality, and death, and thus our children are not becoming the solution as we have hoped, they are becoming the a dull, meaning arousing little interest, lacking liveliness, boring, they are not operating in the means in which we as life are meant to and have the potential to live, which is like a child, innocent, engaging, alive, here, present, curious, adventurous, wild, carefree, freedom, independent, and much more, this point of child in our reality is a gift that has been given to ourselves from life itself to once again see self in a pure form and through that learn how to live in a way that supports all, as this will support oneself and so one’s child as well cause you can take care of it and know when it goes it indeed will expand in all ways possible as self has given that gift of self.

Without though understanding the how to take care of a child properly in this world, one will have difficulty transcending this dullness that occurs to ourselves when we come to adult hood, not everyone in this world does this, but the majority of us do, meaning we settle, we go into the system, survive, don’t question ourselves, don’t question the status quo of this world, don’t question why we accept and allow the annihilation of billions of people, animals, plant species, our clean environment/natural cycles in our eco-living system, and much more. We go into the idea that we are not enough, we can’t do it, we are not smart enough, good enough, there is not enough resources, money, knowledge, but when push comes to shove for myself, what always comes up within me in these moments were I have to face what I am doing to my own inner child and any and all children I meet in this life that I can potential support in a way of what is best for all life, what I do when I don’t stand and essentially let that spark of life that we all see in children’s eyes get snuffed out within me when I settle for a mediocre life, a settled life in the system, a life that is not what is best, this in essence is what the adults in this world have done, we have snuffed out the life within the children to come cause we have essentially done this to ourselves over generations of time and programming. But things have changed, life has emerged in the most unlikely of places and spaces, and is here, standing, with and aligned with all children to come to be able to stand as guardians of not only the children's lives to be best for all, but equally so the home and land in which we were birthed from is lively, enjoying, expressing, and aligned in symbiotic relationships that are supportive and life giving always in all ways.

So it’s a switch of perception I have found into a single focus of what is best for all life in oneness and equality as what would be best for self, and through the tools at desteni and eqafe explained in unbelievable detail over hours of material resources (this source a few of many, but here I see desteni i process my tree of life, my root system from which who i am as a being from this point of starting my process is growing from, so it's a foundational platform to support one to stand as life and essential i have found if one walk this journey with what is here, which I highly recommend) you too can become the steward of the children to come, making them grow from child to wise child as the adult in essence births themselves equally so as the child of existence from a dull location point one was walking into the wonderment of living as a child of existence and through this process of self forgiveness and living the change, one become and so can stand as a support for the children that are here to become wise in the sense that they know and have examples of how to live to be there highest potential, along with and aligned and integrated as best possible with all life around them as oneself, as one's example, as one has done it for themselves, and so now can stand and give the gift to another of self creation. 

This is a journey and a process, though this particular structure I have seen as a pattern for myself of the journey I have walked and now can say am able to stand for the children in my care and to come to be able to give them wisdom to live there best self and truly be able to live life here in joy and peace and prosperity for all life as we know it. And for all life children to come as our future selves, long live ourselves in the best life has to offer. 

Thanks for reading and please feel free to leave any comment or questions if you see fit.

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com - Beginner Course in Desteni I Process
http://www.eqafe.com - Library of Existence
www.destonians.com - Desteni Group Support Network
https://www.facebook.com/groups/DesteniUniverse/ - Desteni Group Facebook Page
https://www.facebook.com/WLthroughgarbseyes - My Personal DIP Sharing
http://www.desteni.org - Main Website
www.patreon.com/earthhaven - Life Community Building Network

The Experience of Being Hurt - My Realizations and Forgiveness - Day 563

Who I am as being hurt by others?

When I am not considered within the point of conversation or interaction, and I take it personal that others are brush with me, quick, overlook what I say or don’t listen at all and go into a reaction, I see the experience of hurt come up within me. Like I have been disregarded, I am not respected, and thus I am alone in my reality. I feel rejected in these times which brings up the experience that I am not able to thrive in the way of my reality that I’d like to, wherein I am able to interact with others, take in what is expressed, and within that be at peace and calm within myself, and express back in a manner that shows a point of maturity that supports and creates life rather then disturbs and destroys.

So I am looking at this experience of acceptance from my reality where if I am not received in a way of getting some sort of positive feedback, I take it personal and become emotional within the experience of hurt. Hurt being the energy experience that feels like a pit opens in my stomach area and my being drops in there feeling lost, my body goes into a slouch and sinking experience, and I become quiet and reserved with others in these states. Tending to go within and shut down not allowing any communication or people to come in until I have recovered and in some area have been uplifted through a positive experience. Leaping from one area to another within myself of being hurt and being happy again through an external stimulus that I have used as addiction to distract me from what I am facing with this hurt experience.

So what I am facing within being hurt by others is the fact that I am seeking acceptance and comfort from them, which is where I get positive feedback and when I don’t receive it I become hurt and end up becoming reactive back. I will go into more detail with the words I live out because there are more. Though focusing on the hurt experience I am having, this will be for example when someone comes at me in a bad mood because something happens in there life and they are not super pleasant, I say something to them and they snap at me. I will experience this hurt experience at this moment and believe that they are being mean, and through this take it personal where my mood will change into being moodier, angered, and resentful. This causing many consequences that are not best for all.

So here I will walk self-forgiveness on this experience of being hurt, and let go of the belief that I need people to give me positive feedback to feel accepted in my environment.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience the people in my environment as hurtful when they express their own emotions in a time of weakness, and I take it personal believing that I am to blame or I am being rejected.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience myself as feeling rejected and left out if I am not received within the people in my environment in a positive way where they express themselves in a way that shows that they like me and I am good in there presence.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the experience of feeling hurt because I have taken it personal in the sense that I have defined myself within the output of others and if someone does not show me pleasantly I believe it’s because they don’t like me and there is something wrong with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not accept myself fully with the flaws and the points I have changed into the best, where I realize I am in a process of growth and rebirth changing myself daily to the best of my ability and pushing my will to give it my all this life, and thus this is something that I have created within me and so within this I have proven that I am for real and that I can be proud of that fact.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek acceptance outside myself instead of living this word within me as I create a home as my temple within and as myself as my physical body, giving myself care, positive feedback, and acceptance for who I am and releasing the idea that I am not enough, I am not good, and I need to do something to be accepted by others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I need words of encouragement by others to feel fulfilled.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thought that I am not enough, when I see, realize, and understand that everything is here, I am enough as I am life fully, and I am able to walk the process as I see is here to become aligned to life one and equal.

I commit myself to create the moments in my day where I give myself care, self-care within myself of words of encouragement, gratefulness for who I have become, and recognizing the perseverance I have consistently shown to myself through difficult times and challenges to pull through and find solutions that support not only myself but others as well.

I commit myself to redefine the word home where I create a space within of comfort, safety, and relaxation as harmony in the understanding that this is a place of warmth to be at ease and know it’ll always be here as I am always here, it is within me thus home is here as me always I just have to breathe and create the space for myself.

I commit myself to give this care and warmth I will commit to live to myself to others unconditionally where I don’t seek anything in return, but practice my self fulfillment through living different ways and words that support me to take care and be self supported.

Support and educate yourself on the links shared:

http://www.desteni.org
http://www.eqafe.com
http://www.earthhaven.org

How I Learned to Trust Myself with the Desteni I Process - Day 536

 

I discuss in this audio how I learned how to trust myself. I was quite an insecure person with little self trust, now standing within myself in self trust and confidence on a mission to support self change and the world to change in the best way possible. This to support and teach all to become stewards of the earth so we can all learn to live in decency and dignity.

Check out the links for more on the process at desteni:

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!

www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material - 

www.Eqafe.com

Forum support: 

www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki: 

wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Superficial – Self Forgiveness and Self Correction to Live – Day 316

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be an image that is seen by others as super, best, desired, and highlighted based on the fact that within and as who I am I have accepted and allowed to see myself as inferior to others image and thus stand to compete rather then be here in who we are for real equal as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as an image only and thus compare and compete against other images in my world not realizing and/or living the fact that all images are illusion of the mind created to separate in to more or less, and thus this is used by the ego to be best while others lose causing abuse. Life here do not abuse as life as self realize that all here is self thus one is only abusing oneself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only see images around me, based on desires and emotional attachments as energies of acceptance or feeling good because someone liked my image and thus am limited within the acceptance of others liking me rather then me giving this to myself and creating a real relationship with myself in creating what I enjoy and what I will accept and allow and what not as a self direction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only limit myself and my environment to seeing images alone as pictures and emotional attachments in my mind missing the truth of what is real, that life is not images and thus life is not a feeling or emotions, but is simply here living and can be lived in common sense and equality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself with images and desiring to be special within being a ‘super’ ‘face’ rather then seeing what is relevant and thus what needs changing through creating and ensuring the best life for all here on this planet, where images is not relevant as obviously life is more then images.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use distractions such as competition and comparison to get what I want through using this super face as this will only cause self compromise because I am not self willed and self directed, but directed by polarities through energy that will only seek this fulfillment as self interest and not reality based living to make sure the change necessary within me and thus the without of me as this world is sorted and all abuse ends.

When and as I see I am going into a point of desire in wanting my image looked at or changing myself in a point of self compromise for others to accept me, I stop and breath, and I realize that within this I am compromising myself because I am split and thus not self directed and so will easily be swayed by desires and the mind and others acceptance then what is best for life through standing within this point no matter what mind desires or points I face.

I commit myself to stop and investigate each point I go into of self compromise where I am searching for something outside myself like a feeling or a acceptance, and thus stop participating in it until I am satisfied I can stand in this point.

I commit myself to stop the point of self compromising by checking through slowing down my starting point for doing things, and correct it if it's due to a point of acceptance outside myself.

I commit myself to give self care and self nurture through testing and developing this point for myself through becoming gentle with me but steadfast within my discipline to stop going into self interest/self compromise.

I commit myself to stop defying this point of self care and self acceptance by actually being consistent within it and stopping all the mind attachments within self interest/self compromise, and embrace self within and as all that is here and walking whatever is necessary to make sure I can stand no matter what and not be swayed by emotions or feelings as these are not real and thus I commit to stop participating in them and focus on physical reality, my breath, and living in and with my body as I move.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki
Equal Money System Website
Equal Life Foundation







Artwork By Fellow Destonian:
Marlen Vargas Del Razo


Check Marlen out here:
Facebook
Youtube
Blog