Sunday, October 8, 2017

Enough is Enough - Stopping an Addiction - Day 560

There is a specific power that comes with making a decision for self and living that decision into a proven fact in reality, and this specific power is self empowerment. What is self empowerment? To me, I have found this empowerment is the ability to move myself in my reality within self awareness in a direction that I create. So much of our days move with stimulus being pushed in our face, consumerism products, ways to escape life’s challenges, mind altering substances, the list goes on, though through it all and in the end there is a choice and a decision that one makes to either live out the controlled reaction of consumption or direct oneself to decide on if that consumption is something you in fact want to live out or not. So the power of self moves from this force to consume based on like a compulsion within self or an internal decision to move and decide for oneself in self awareness and direct action in reality.

The phrase enough is enough is supportive for the act of stopping an addiction one has, though one has to get to this point and in many cases it does not even have to get to the point where one realizes ‘ok, enough is enough?’, but in most cases I have found at least in the beginning of stopping addictive patterns and habits, this self realization is in fact supportive to stop. For me, hitting rock bottom so to speak was a terrible experience, it was not comfortable and it was not easy, though what i realized about myself in that moment is that I have to get up and I have to stop, I can not continue on this way or my life is going to go to shit and be a waste. I had to do this for myself, my life, and my functioning in my reality in a way that is best for me and continues to support my enviroment the best i am able to. In short, i realized instead of continuing to destroy myself how about I actually support myself and the potential i have seen many times and creates this infectious passion that drives me to grow and expand. This is what I want my life to be about self expansion, self growth, and not only supporting myself, but supporting as many as possible to realize and reach their highest potentials as well.

Stopping an addiction is not going to be done with just a phrase though, yes it supports with self realization, but to stop an addiction one has to decide and then apply that decision every day until the addiction is transcended. And you will be challenged throughout with temptations, with new dimensions opening up, with physical stimulus and desires being triggered, but within oneself there is a power that resides and this power is the power to decide, live, and thus prove to oneself that I can in fact stop and change. Once this is realized, this creates a confidence and a self authority that no one can take away from oneself and will only support who one is in the life that will be lived. Though in the meantime as one walks the process of stopping the addiction, these questions supported me, questions such as understanding why I am stopping my addiction? What is the purpose? Am I doing this for me? What will I do if I fall? Also, answering questions such as why am I so addicted to this point? What comfort is it giving me? What am I trying to escape from? What is my capacity? Who am I? What can I rather do or create that’ll support me? What is my strengths?
I work with the desteni I process as well which is a process of supporting oneself through one’s mind and behaviors with self forgiveness and self corrective change in writing and living. This process and self forgiveness specifically works with the inner workings of self that is happening and that is in fact driving our behaviors in many ways to do what we do, and thus to understand why and also find solutions for it. This platform is laid out in a structured way and definitely supported me to stop and transcend many addictions such as alcohol, weed (heavy user), masturbation, self sabotage patterns, and I am continuing.

There is also the 21 day support process where I have stopped an addiction for 21 days, if I fell and I went into the addiction again I would start the 21 days over until I was complete with stopping for 21 days. For heavy addictions, I would walk this in phases, so 21 days, then 1 month, then 3 months, then 6 months, then a year until I no longer have any desires. Again the desire does come up once and a while, but not as strong and potent. All the while through that process, working with my mind and thoughts to why I kept on with the addiction, working with fears, working with insecurities, working with self judgments, and writing out self forgiveness and self correction solutions to then in real life living be equipped and prepared to live out the correction as solution that I wrote out for myself. It is also helpful to speak self forgiveness when the moment comes up to to support with real time moments of change needed or to release built up emotions. There is much more on these points in the sites below so please follow the links for more or can ask me questions in the comment section if need be, I would be happy to support.

For more support on self and life, please check out the links:

[Eqafe - Every Question Answered For Everyone :) ] (

[Desteni I Process - Self Development Support] (

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Living Words Process and Support:

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life

Forum support:

Desteni Wiki:

Eqafe Facebook Page:

7 year journey to life Facebook group:

Sunday, September 17, 2017

When is Enough, Enough? - Day 559

I have been exploring and applying this concept of having enough with something and changing direction within myself for the purpose of bettering my life and having a positive impact on the world around me. Though, I often thought of this concept or idea in a way of feeling good about it, wanting to access and achieve this goal, feeling like i am a hero if i indeed say enough is enough and so live it. What usually happens in such cases where i just start imagining living the statement enough is enough and thinking about it, is that I would eventually fall because I didn’t in fact do anything physically to live out the change. Fascinating how we can trick ourselves in the secrets of our minds. You can also test this, start thinking about a pattern you want to stop, go into the experiences of how it will be when you do stop, and from there in the next hour or the next day go and implement the imaginations you saw for yourself to stop and get to your goal. You will find that it is very difficult if not impossible to implement such change with such swiftness as the mind did in your thinking. That is because physical reality is real and takes actual creation, actual movement, and this requires ones self will to in fact do change self and remain consistent in it day in and day out. It's an actual doing rather then just sitting back and letting the mind do all the work with thinking.

So what I started to realize about this idea of ‘when is enough, enough?’ is that I was making it into a personality, making me feel a specific way such as powerful, important, superior, yet this did not in any way help or will me to actually live the change out in physical reality. What do I mean by creating a personality or a persona? It is like creating a character in a movie, pretending to be the hero in the film, saying all the right things, moving in all the right ways, and moving around the stage in the choreographed way to save the distressed person, but all the while it was never real as it was make believe, not being who one really is because when one actually go to reality and try and stop it becomes like climbing a mountain thousands of feet tall not enough of self is in the actual physical reality to be able to climb such a feat. The mountain being seen as impossible, when it's not that it is impossible, one has to only build the resolve and stamina, build the self, and live the change necessary to see it through. This can only be done through physical effort and movement otherwise it goes into the mind and off into image-land where it's easily let go of, given up on, and forgotten because it was never real, self was not here living it, and so it is not done for real.

These dimensions I had to work with for myself to in fact become a person who was no longer desiring fake persona’s, but working with the actual reality of myself and through that finding a way to will myself to change to in fact live the statement enough is enough. This is where the real journey starts because I had to investigate and understand myself within the patterns I was working with to stop, I had to forgive myself and stick to the corrective process of change I saw that would indeed support the change needed to stop and live differently. Also within this underlying the whole point the entire time one is applying this phrase is the unconditional nature of consistency that is embedded within living the statement enough is enough. One in fact has to become absolute within the consistency of the principle of what is being lived or rather the why you are doing what you are doing and also through that I realized that I also have to be flexible. 

There are in moments new dimensions of learning that can come into view in any given moment as one has stopped a particular point one no longer see is best, and so this new information or knowledge so to speak has to be considered, applied, and see if it is best. Thus potentially dropping the old and embracing the new, what matters is not the flow of the journey, but who one is within it and how one lives self honesty in doing what is best for all as this will always be best for self. This will take time, patiences, and a level of self willingness to be challenged and be courageous to stop one's addictions and live the statement enough is enough, I will change so all have the ability to change, and this world can change to be best for all. This is the more difficult path because one is going against the grain of what has always been comfortable and easy for oneself, though this journey is most rewarding as it builds a empowered practical being that has a willingness and proven ability to change self when it is understood to do so.

The purpose I am walking within myself in the statement of enough is enough is absolute in the sense that I am willing myself to stop all abuses within me, in my thoughts, in my words, and in my actions to become a being that is self responsible and able to be trusted with life, and this is a decision and purpose I have to keep assessing, keeping in my focus, and applying in my everyday life. As again it is not the usual path or the easy path. My function is no longer to be of service to myself alone, but to be of service to all life because this world indeed needs to change, and if i can’t change myself how will the world ever change. Only self can determine the hows and the whys of the statement enough is enough for one’s life, but putting it into practice makes for a powerful being, best to walk what is best as this will always in turn be best for self and create a world that is best for all. We need more empowered beings in this world that stand up to stop all abuse and say enough is enough, I will stop and I will change to be the best I can be in service of all life, let's stand together as plus ones in the statement of enough is enough of the abuse to life, til here no further I stop, I change, I live what is best for all.For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below.

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Living Words Process and Support:

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -

Self Supportive Material -

Forum support:

Desteni Wiki:

Eqafe Facebook Page:

7 year journey to life Facebook group:

Monday, July 17, 2017

Focused Living - Day 558

How to Practically Live a Word - Focus

My current definition and how I see this word Focus:

Focus for me as how I have been seeing it and living it in the past is I am seeing as an undesired force put upon me in things that I did not want to focus on, mainly i am seeing my mom making me focus on things i had no real interest in like church or playing with dolls, this when i was little and thus being forced to focus on these things based on her needs and not my own. Also I am seeing school where teachers would make us focus on our school work in classrooms where i couldn’t get up and move around, and so I was forced to focus on subjects and topics in boxed rooms closed off to the outside world where i couldn’t move about in freedom, which i highly resisted. This would more be the negative attachments to the word focus i have placed in me. 

On the positive side, I am seeing the word focus as a means to an end where i get something, like money or accolades for focusing in on something, doing it well, and then being reward with some sort of praise or gift. Focusing then was done to inflate my ego or my experience of myself as superior through gaining something externally to make me feel more important or better about myself. So needing something externally like money or praise from others as a reward for me to feel something about myself in a positive way, and if i was focused in what i did I realized I had a better chance of getting these things that made me feel good about myself and my life.

My Redefinition: 

Focus - how i am seeing living the word focus is an actual physical movement within myself in moments where i become distracted in thinking and/or in things I am doing. So to live focus would be to move toward the center of myself in my awareness into the center of my body. It’s a supportive word that realigns my self awareness back to my center point and i am noticing that this center point focus is right in the middle of my chest, just above my breast bone and below my neck. This is specific this spot as it feels in a way like a source of strength, this strength is here within me as me and living this word focus when i move my awareness into my physical presence of myself as this center point in my chest and then i live it into the task i am doing I find my ability to live what it fact I set myself out to do becomes much more streamlined and specific, and I have less strain to in fact get it done. A support word I have found also is the words slowing down, which supports with moving from the busyness of the distraction such as thinking or getting entertained by something outside myself, slowing back to down to my physical breath and thus moving into the word focus which I again support myself with to move into this center point in my chest. From here, I move into the task I set out for myself to live. 

Contexts in how i will live this word Focus:

Work - In work i plan to write out a list when i first sit down at my desk and start my day, living the word focus, i am going to use this word as the redefined living of it to move my focus back to my physical body, working with centering my self awareness in that center point in my chest when i see i start to lose focus in my day and become distracted with desires such as checking facebook or getting up and speaking to people around the office unnecessarily just to not face what it is I must get done. Using the word focus and the action of become centered inside myself focusing on breathing and my physical body, I can move myself out of the desire to distract myself and stick to the task list i had made out in the beginning of my work day to stay on task and move through the day with more effective efficency. 

Yoga - Yoga is an activity i have been wanting to integrate in my day to day, though I have resisted it due to the uncomfortability in my body i feel in doing it because it is slow and hurts me as i am not that flexible. Here i plan to use the word focus to again focus my awareness on the physical, bringing me out of the distractions of my mind and into my physical body movements as i work with yoga positions and breathing techniques. 

Desire to give up at task during my day - I notice often how easily i tend to go into giving up when things become uncomfortable in my body or I have to put a bit more effort or even sometimes a lot more effort into something that I am doing. For example, I was bringing laundry up a flight of stairs and it was extra full and thus extra heavy. I wanted to give up and just drop it to get a break. I remembered this word focus with the movement of slowing down meaning moving out of my head in thoughts and back into my chest center point as my physical presence awareness, and from here i moved my awareness into my whole body. I found this supported with balancing myself in my body where i was using a lot more muscles and focus on these muscles rather then going into my head and wasting my energy in thinking and thus eventually giving into the desire to stop. So here i am going to use this word focus to support me in these moments where i want to give up and instead of giving up, center myself in my physical body, move into my self awareness as this chest center point, and from here as my self awareness is present live the word focus as i focus in on the task at hand and live that to get it done. 

Thanks all for reading and will report later in the week of how this is going. 

Friday, June 23, 2017

FLOW - As Art - Day 557

Playing with the word FLOW -- this word i have been looking at for a while and practicing implementing it more in my life, I came up with the redefinition of the word being - 'Flow like water -always here yet always moving.' This practically i can see living it in ways of moving through times that i am challenged where I want to give up, though with this word flow I remember to be flexible within the moments that are challenging because in these moments is where opportunity is birthed and solutions are created. The mind can make it seem like there is only dead ends, yet living the word flow, here yet always moving reminds us to keep pushing self creation in our own unique self expressions by not giving up, but expanding out and creating something from you here. Water creates life through flow, we can equally create ourselves as our life living this word flow....Test it for yourself and give feedback, enjoy. #water#flow #brucelee #livingwords #art#drawing #desteni Find out more on living words @schoolofultimateliving

For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below. 

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Living Words Process and Support:

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

Self Supportive Material - 

Forum support: 

Desteni Wiki: 

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Eqafe Hangout: Purpose Has Left the Building - Day 556

Many thanks to Kristina Salas for particpating and sharing your realizations with us all!

Our Hangout will be discussing this interview on

Follow up interviews that was discussed: 

Interview Synopsis: 

"What is my purpose? What is the point of my life? What am I supposed to be doing? In this interview Anu reveals the systematic design of the mind consciousness system and its relationship with our beingness potential, and why it can often feel like we are so far away from our purpose and meaning in life when in fact they are closer than we may realize. What is the one question that we need to ask ourselves that will really help us to see and understand what having a purpose and meaning to life actually means?" 

Here Kristina Salas and I will be discussing our relationship to this word purpose. How have we experienced this word in our living and what in our process of self change have we gone through with working with our purpose in this life and if in fact we even know what this is for ourselves. Also, what in this interview supported us to see this word differently and what new insights and solutions came through that can support all to live their highest potentials. 

Links to Check Out for More Support: 

A Chat with Sunette Spies: The Interdimensional Portal from Eqafe 

Eqafe Site: 

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course: 

Desteni I Process - Pro: 

Forum support: 

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

Earth Haven - Building Oneness and Equality Solutions:

Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Living the Word Freedom - Redefined - Day 555


Current Allocation:

Freedom is something i desire but believe it’s out of reach for my life in this world. There is a yearning for freedom, like i know it’s there, it’s somewhere, it’s possible, yet it does not seem as if it ever will be reached without great effort and inner and outer change. Freedom also is represented in my mind through flags and fireworks and parades, where it’s symbolized based on holiday parties and festivities ingrained over my life time in my country that my family and friends very much participated in and some in the patriotism of it. I myself felt uncomfortable with the country’s freedom as i know that to get this so called freedom, war was involved thus to me showing that this is not real freedom, and that we will always be enslaved to this mindset that there is some enemy out there and we need to dominate or win to become free. Yet this same dominance and winning status is always under threat and always able to be destroyed through conflict, abuse, and thus suffering. Suffering and freedom to me were counter-intuitive thus counter-productive and essentially made no sense, so my relationship with the word freedom is as if it is a catch phrase, not real, and that those who follow this are insane or just brainwashed and not able to see clearly what makes sense and what doesn’t. I am also seeing anger within me towards the holiday of supposed freedom we celebrate and those who don’t question, yet, i see that this is my own reaction within me of a desire to want to be free for real right now. Though i see it is not yet possible and so i go and blame everyone else when i see, realize, and understand I was equally within that group to such a possessed degree due to culture and it’ll take a process of understanding, support, self forgiveness, and self correction to change the way the world as self lives freedom within and without.

Dictionary Definition:




1) the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint.

"we do have some freedom of choice"

2) absence of subjection to foreign domination or despotic government.

"he was a champion of Irish freedom"

synonyms: independence, self-government, self-determination, self-rule, home rule,

3) sovereignty, nonalignment, autonomy; democracy

"revolution was the only path to freedom”

4) the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved.


freedom (n.) Look up freedom at

Old English freodom "power of self-determination, state of free will; emancipation from slavery, deliverance;" see free (adj.) + -dom. Meaning "exemption from arbitrary or despotic control, civil liberty" is from late 14c. Meaning "possession of particular privileges" is from 1570s. Similar formation in Old Frisian fridom, Dutch vrijdom, Middle Low German vridom. Freedom-rider recorded 1961 in reference to civil rights activists in U.S. trying to integrate bus lines.

It has been said by some physicians, that life is a forced state. The same may be said of freedom. It requires efforts, it presupposes mental and moral qualities of a high order to be generally diffused in the society where it exists. [John C. Calhoun, speech, U.S. House of Representatives, Jan. 31, 1816]

Freedom fighter attested by 1903 (originally with reference to Cuba). Freedom-loving (adj.) is from 1841.

Word Play:

Free-dumb, free-doom, free-dome, free = fear removed

Negative Placement:

Here i see that within myself there is a long path to become free and also a free world where life is able to co-exist and sustain itself as each one individual sustains themselves. So there is a fear here, fear of not having it, and thus more and more being removed from creating it as fear is not free, but the restriction of freedom. So bringing through a degree of stress, anxiety, and claustrophobia within the thought of if ever real freedom will be lived and what comes up within me is this world system, the enslavement of man over everything and everyone into destruction.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into a fear that freedom is inaccessible within myself and this world as i go into the idea that freedom is impossible to reach.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for freedom out in the world system, outside of myself, where i need to attain or reach something to become or get freedom.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe freedom is impossible to live within and as my self and so this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the living word of freedom within myself.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to project freedom onto the way our system is set up at the moment and believe that it’s never going to be doable with all the abuse as enslavement that is existing here.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame the world system and the people in the world system as the fault to why freedom is not able to be lived instead of bringing the point back to myself and seeing where in fact i am enslaving and limiting myself within my own self imposed ideas, beliefs, and judgments.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge and create ideas and beliefs about the way in which this world and within myself need to live instead of moving within the freedom of my own expression and through this working with what is here as it is here within the creative mobility that exist within any given moment as i create myself.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to place freedom as an idea within my mind rather then a living word to be physically lived and created and so in this idea move into disempowerment within myself because it seems unattainable.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that the function of myself and this world in this moment is not how it will always be and thus potential for growth and change is always here.

I commit myself to release the ideas, beliefs, and judgments of my expression in a moment and allow the expression of what is here as myself become free from limitations and expand within and through who i am as i create myself with what is here.

I commit myself to go into releasing the separation between who i am as the living word freedom moving into a flow of myself in any given moment taking responsibility for who i am and expanding through the support of this word as i move out of the dome of my limitations and exist here free as my fear is removed and i breath and live with and as reality.

Postitive Placement:

On the positive feeling side, I am seeing the word free is very light and electric feeling, like the potential for the best of life is possible within this world and it makes me feel airy and nice inside. There is an inkling of possibility, oh yes like a hope, and here i can see the complacency that settles into my mind and thus my physical where there is no real action of changing self and becoming self responsible through words and living. Thus the idea is nice to think about and ponder in my imagination of how great it’ll be or could be, yet all the while not actually really creating freedom within myself by living as it and so freedom does not yet actually exist cause it stops at the thinking stage because the energy fades and then I get hit with reality and it’s too much work/effort.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to move into a point of self desire as a dream state of what freedom would look like or feel like as i go imagining in my mind what this will look like or feel like, never actually making significant change to who i am in the physical as my words and living.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to exist within a hope of freedom coming one day if this and this and this works out and if i do this and this and this thing in the future soon to come, yet within my actual physical movement there is no significant change as i am spending my time dreaming about freedom and what i could and will be doing instead of actually living it.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become complacent within myself with the imaginations of life in a free world and how awesome that would be tailoring it up with different technology and how humans will co-exist with animals and within this waste time and resources on mind generation and not self creation.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to my addictions as positive energy such as lust for a place of peace and freedom, or excitement in the thought of what a world would look and feel like, or the happiness feeling when i see in my mind’s eye all the animals and humans getting along, and within that be fulfilled as the energy releases and i stop actually moving in the physical and changing myself because i have accepted and allowed myself to get off on energy addiction in these imagination feelings that get created thus disempowering me to move myself and limiting my potential to live and become substantial and so do nothing of real value which supports all life.

I commit myself to move into the living words ‘i matter’ as i ground myself into the physical letting go of the imagination thoughts and create myself as matter within how i live in every moment to create real value as i move myself in the physical in what will be best for all life.

I commit myself to live words such as self creation and consistency as i move from my mind illusions into my physical living and letting go of the complacent addiction to go into hope and desire thus not actual do anything to change what is here within and without.

I commit myself to life the word freedom as i release myself from the addictive thought patterns of positive feelings and move into the solidity of my physical living, expanding myself through my limited beliefs and ideas and imaginations and creating myself in a real substantial way that will eventually create all life to be free to express here as the will themselves as all align as i live for myself in what is best for all life.

Re-Defining the Word Freedom:

The direct definition I see for the word freedom is to become free from the dome that is my mind as the limitations within fear i have accepted and allowed to hold me back from living as my creative expression in every moment. Freedom is the removal of fear as i will myself to be free beyond my limitations that is currently existing as my mind consciousness system programs and constructs holding me back from being me and who i am in any given moment as a self created being in what’s best. Freedom is what is beyond the limitations of self imposed mind systems and self live free from fear here.

For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below.

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Living Words Process and Support:

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -

Self Supportive Material -

Forum support:

Desteni Wiki:

Eqafe Facebook Page:

7 year journey to life Facebook group:

Saturday, May 27, 2017

Eqafe Hangout: From Shyness to Self Confidence - Day 554

Thanks so much to Valentin Rozman for sharing your realizations and solutions you have walked in your process in this hangout.

Find the interview here:

Interview synopsis:

"How to Transcend Shyness and become Self Confident within absolute Unconditional Self Expression."

Here in this discussion, Valentin and I will be looking at our experiences in our life of how we have transcended shyness to live with more self confidence and self authority. We will share what tools and practical methods we walked to create this change for ourselves. Also, we will discuss what fears we had to face and work through in this journey of walking through shyness and transforming it into self confidence.

These hangouts are for the purpose of educating all on the support given at the website, which shares through thousands of audio recordings the understanding of the human potential in this life. Where the listener can gain practical support that can be walked to help themselves become more effective in their everyday living.