Day 28 - Allowing Self to Flow - The Hips - Resisting what is here

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So from working through the points with my gut, and working with trusting myself, I am moving on to the hips, where i am finding them to have gained some weight, and also have some pain in the left side. This pain is in the joint area where it feels as if it has been over worked or over used, compensating for the imbalance of my walk where I tend to put more weight on my left side when walking. So some words to work with here is overcompensating, inflexibility, immobile, constriction, and imbalance. 

I am seeing that due to my relationships in the past and my own self relationship with myself, I have allowed myself to become more left side dominant then right side, causing those muscles to be over used and over worked causing pain and discomfort. The weight gain i am seieng due to staying stuck in the past, not moving myself here in the physical through staying stuck in my mistakes i allowed and in this the expressions of self that i didn't live into. This resistance i am seeing of facing my past and what i have allowed in relationships for instance with others and myself, i am over compensating within my day to day activities, pushing beyond my flexibility and capacity where i want to do something, but i have not allowed my body and self discipline to catch up with the potential i am seeing. Not stretching for instance, spending the extra time to warm up before i go into the critical exercise and heavy tax on my body/self, but just move through the pain and discomfort, even though it is causing potential damage. This a lack of self awareness and self discipline, and essentially being lazy, giving up on my best.  

 Within my relationships, this is staying in a relationship or moving out of a relationship due to the thoughts of something is wrong or all is good, not working step by step with the physical and the reality feedback, but wanting it to be the way that suits me best for my interest. Lacking self honesty when in fact i require it to ensure that i am not fucking myself or another, and not allowing or accepting any abuse within my reality/self space. If i am allowing this in my world, then i am allowing it in others worlds as well, maybe not deliberately directly, but subtle it is playing out until eventually it comes to a head and all hell breaks lose and energy outbursts is created.  

Self forgiveness

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to resist the patience and stability as self discipline it'll take to walk the step by step process in the physical to walk the alignment of ensuring the steps are taken i can see that will support myself to be the best i can be and ensure the consideration of all involved is well aligned and understood so all benefit as best possible not matter the effort it'll take as long as what is best and common sense is considered.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into a desire to take it easy and work with my desires, where i can give into my wants and perceived needs within the idea that i am good, i can do it another time.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that time is something that i have to use with as i please, when i see, realize, and understand that everything has a consequence and everything is existing within space time and in my desires/ wants/ needs i am truly only considering myself and my small circle as my local environment not considering all life within the principles that i live within as it is in self interest only and not what is best for all. 

 I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be desiring to get my own way and in this not listen to common sense, but only listen to my mind as self interest reasoning that i can do what i want or i can get what i want and in that push beyond the consideration of all, and push to get my needs met above others.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame others within my reality about what has transpired in my world, where i seek out the point of desiring the punishment to go onto them as i believe i was done onto and in this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i was justified to harm others within my force of self onto others where i got my own way and punished others and in this believed that i won, when i see, realize, and understand no one wins. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful within and as my reality, where i go into blame and anger toward the injustices of others as i believe, instead of taking self responsibility for what i have created and finding the will to live something new that is aligned to others/all and live this change until it is done.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become lazy and apathetic within and as the movement of self to do what is necessary to be done to ensure a world that is best for all as i start with myself within self discipline and self honesty to forgive myself for my past, and walk a change process that is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not have compassion within and as others and myself as a point of walking the change process as it takes time and ensuring that application of breathe awareness and constant alignment with what is best as what is best for self is live within my day to day living, letting go of the want desire of self interest and considering in common sense what i can do that is best for all involved. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be spiteful and angry when i do not get my way as i see my life then will be more difficult.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear being and living life more difficult instead of walking my consequence no matter what it is and aligning myself to the solutions that is best for all life. 

I forgive msyelf to be in flexible within and as change when change is necessary to direct and correct myself to what is best and what will ensure i am able to do what is best in my living as this in fact is the only way of life that matters and is truly what i would want for myself and in all shoes if i had to live in them.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to resist my past instead of accepting my past as myself, forgive it as myself, and change myself to align here with what is best for all as living words and living solutions to the best of my ability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to ignore the signs of imbalance within my body, prioritizing performance or outcomes over presence and care.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to equate pain with progress, instead of seeing that pain is my body’s voice asking for care, realignment, and change.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to rush my process out of fear of not being enough, instead of trusting the timing of my realignment as breath by breath, here.

When and as I see myself wanting to push through pain or discomfort without listening to my body, I stop and I breathe. I remind myself that my body is not a machine to conquer, but a living being I am here to walk with in partnership.

When and as I resist slowing down or preparing properly (emotionally or physically), I realize I am sabotaging my own potential. I choose preparation and structure over rush and self-interest.

When and as I go into guilt or regret about my past mistakes in relationships, I stop. I breathe. I remind myself that I am not defined by the past, but by who I choose to be in this breath forward.

I commit myself to let go of the desire in self interest to get what i want, and align myself in thought word and deed to what is best for all with my money, my awareness, my time, my energy as i see this is truly the world i would like to create and raise children in.

I commit myself to never give up on myself as all life within the acceptance of what is here and taking full self responsibility to walk my talk in common sense to do what i am able in the space i have to align life to what is best for all through equality and oneness and what is best for all.

I commit myself to stand in self discipline and consistency as i change myself to self interest only to what is best for all as would be best for me proven in my living, and tracking it in my day to day operations.

I commit myself to listen to my physical body more, i commit myself to live the word gentleness where i care for myself and my physical that has been pushed beyond limits at time and requires compassion as self here. 

I commit myself to remain stead fast in my principles of life as self forgiveness, accepting myself for who i am and changing myself step by step as i let go of the past through self forgiveness and changing through living words that will ensure i am living the best version of myself within a consistent application and growth. Also i commit myself to get up from each fall, and stand as life until all life is free as i have freed myself here as breathe. 

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Care to Be Gentle Dear Lady? - Day 459

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Gentleness I have written about before, though I have not yet incorporated it into my daily living. So here in this blog I want to explore the word and definition and find a re-definition I can live with that’ll support for myself as I move through what is to come within walking my mind layers specifically opening up the ‘evil’ side of myself in which I have not lived best for all and have not as of yet investigated to the truth of who I am in self honesty, this is where I am heading.  

“Gentleness is the quality of being kind and careful. The original meaning, from around 1300, was "inherited nature," but by the 1600s it had come to mean "freedom from harshness and violence," with the Latin root gentilis, "of the same family or clan." (Vocabulary.com)

I am looking at this word from the perspective of not only being gentle with other’s but also being gentle with myself because I have a tendency of being too hard on myself and so become quite rigid. So within this I see that gentleness as a living word I implement into my daily life will help to transition myself into a balance of living where I am firm, but expansive within who and how I live with myself and so with others as well. So correcting the relationship within myself will then equally correct the relationship with others in my world, this is based on the principle of as within, so without. As I can see currently as I am hard and rigid with myself, I also am like this with others in my world at times.

So playing with the sound of the word Gentle:

Gene Tell

Generation Entail

Generous to Life

So what I see within this word exploration of the sounding of this word, is two points that it is dealing with, one the origin of ourselves as the word gene as well as generation is within the word sounding, and within the definition I placed here it is interesting that it says that the original meaning of the word from the 1300’s was “inherited nature”. Also, the Latin root of the word is of the same family or clan. So within this point we are looking at our origins, the fabric of our existences, who we are within the make up of our beingness, and to embody and live out the word gentleness, one would have to be able to understand and so stand within the genes of who I am, the fabric that is of creation of myself as this physical body which is life itself = physical matter. If one does not understand oneself within who they are as life then how can I live that which is ‘generous to life’ as the second point to consider because if I don’t know myself as life then I can not give that to others and so live generously.

Though as a direct definition, I see the fact that walking my process is essential, though walking it in a way where I consider others as equal to myself and so considering myself as equal to others and giving to others as how I would like to be treated and so treating myself as how I would treat others. This will be lived in different ways with different people, and this will support with the expression of myself, which is cool as this is supporting the process of what is best for all. So for gentleness, I will implement, being generous with myself in the sense that I give to myself equal to what I would want from others and this in the way of the origin of the nature of who we are as life, so caring for myself, loving myself, accepting myself, understanding myself, correcting myself, giving room for correction through time to myself, and so then living this with others. I would say the point has to manifest and be proven as myself and this will be in the way in which I treat others in my world. The physical living will be the proof so to speak. Once I am able to live this as myself and start to shift into living it with others in my world, then I know I have walked this point through and am becoming gentle as a living expression of myself.  This is all I have for now.

Thanks for reading and check out the links.

Exclusive Interview Support on Gentleness and Self Correction:

Finding your Stability Voice/Sound - Atlanteans' Support - Part 65
Purifying Love and the Sounding of Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans' Sup…
Suppression: Free Yourself - Atlanteans - Part 228


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Equal Life Foundation - Site

What Does It Mean to Be and So Live the Word: Gentle - Day 417

Art By: Marlen Vargas Del Razo

My partner and I have been looking at the dimensions of this word and how we are practically going to live this within ourselves as well as starting the process to apply it with each other. The first dimension I am looking at within the living of the word gentle is a form of taking care of myself and of another. What does taking care of another and myself mean in this context is that within the principle of treating others as how I would like to be treated and using this as a guideline to live this word in everyday living, I can see that I will embody the living of the word care because of my consideration within this principled lived out. If I care for another as I would myself then I am in the same way taking care of myself, I am caring for life in all it’s forms within this principle because caring for another as myself, I realize I will want the best for myself and so I will live the best for others then equally. So within myself, I see I have to align and so correct any points that are not aligned within this principle through writing self forgiveness and self corrective statements. Through this process of correcting myself, I realize that I will then take responsibility for my actions as well as the outflow consequences of my actions with others and be able to direct myself in a way that is caring and so walking the process to becoming and living gentleness.

The next dimension I am looking at within being gentle is where I see I have to embody a humility with myself as well as others in my world, the definition of humility being:

Humility - noun - a modest or low view of one's own importance; humbleness.

So through living out this word humility, I will be living within the principle of care and so gentleness as I allow myself to become without desire or driven within self interest as I ensure that the other is treated as an equal to myself. This through applying breath and stepping back, letting go of ego driven self interest and desires, which is living only for one’s self importance and pride. I must let go of that which is driven by my self interest and so my ego, which is driven by the mind to embody and so be able to in physical living, live gentleness and care with others. By releasing my ego through correction in writing and living the change, I can start to become self directed as my awareness will start to step forth. Expressing in a way that is real and done within a self-decision of walking the process of correction and then living what one has realized within the alignment of principles that is best for all, is a sure way to become the living embodiment of these words that will support others and oneself, and so support all life as I would like to live this word gentle for myself and others I meet.

Another dimension I see I have to look at within living this word gentle is who am I within myself in relation to being gentle? Am I a gentle person to myself in my thought, word, and deed? f I don’t become gentle with myself and take care of myself, how can I expect to do this for another? I commonsensical see that this is not possible, as the principle of life reads, “as within, so without”. I can see this as well as I become harden and stubborn within myself when I hold on to my views, my rights, my ideas, my opinions, my, my, my, and so not in any way live in a way of care and so gentleness. I see that within this act of becoming harden and stubborn within myself, I am actually hiding fears and so living in fear, not able to live in a way of gentleness or caring because I am being pre-occupied with fear in my mind reality absent from physical reality. So another alignment that is required is to continue to walk my self process within correcting all the fears that come up within me and so on the other side, all the desires as these two experiences within are balancing each other out. When I fear I try and compensate with desire, feeling good, getting a high only to return again to the fear as it never goes away as I am accepting it is real. So walking this process in aligning with principles of life and living words, such as the word gentleness will support what is best for all and so always again what is best for self.

I will continue in following posts with self forgiveness and self corrective statements. Thanks for reading.

Suggest reading:

Day 116: Re-Defining Words to Living Words

Day 5: In the Beginning was God

Also, listening to these Supportive vlogs:

From Energy to Sound - Atlanteans' Support - Part 63
From Speaking to Sounding Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans' Support - Part 64
Finding your Stability Voice/Sound - Atlanteans' Support - Part 65

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Equal Life Foundation - Site

Day 290 – Self Judgment – “I Deserve to Suffer” – Self Commitment Statements to Live

Please reference the blog - Day 289 – Self Judgment – “I Deserve to Suffer?”, to see the self forgiveness in correlation with these self commitments. 

When and as I see myself go into the thought that ‘I am flawed, and I deserve to suffer’, I stop and breath, and realize this is a point of self manipulation to gain attention from others and not face the reality of myself as being a bully to me. I realize that I have to walk the process of letting go these self judgments within and as me so I can see myself from the physical within and as what is real as the physical and let go of the mind definitions as I realize they are not real, they are illusion, and I can and have to will this point of self definition and direction in who I am in each moment of breath.

I commit myself to let go of all the thoughts that are of a self judgment and immediately apply myself in breath to not allow the energy as depression take over and walk through the point of low that comes with self judgment.

I commit myself to remain in the physical by moving through within and as the physical body as a stable support through focusing my movements, my breath, and focusing on the fact that this is what gives me my life to live, my physical body and my breath.

I commit myself to embrace myself within all considerations and appreciate myself within the things that I walk through within a point of self-discipline and self-dedication, giving me self-praise and self-love.

I commit myself to let of the desire for perfection and focus on my physical perfection in my living, moving in the direction of this physical reality as perfection through my blogs, vlogs, and living action with self and with the group that walks this into being.

When and as I see that I go into the point of seeing it is time to abuse my physical by mentally beating on it, I stop and breath, and immediately realize and focus on the fact that this is not real, it’s coming up as thought, which is not physical and the nature of it is self harm, harming myself and physical which is unacceptable as this is what is supporting me to live.

I commit to accept all forms of the physical and thus walk the process of correcting that which is harmful to the physical and self as the physical within self honesty and self correction through self forgiveness.

I commit myself to stop all forms of judgment onto the physical and embrace that point by speaking the purpose of it here as it giving me life. For example, the eye gives sight, the heart gives flow, the breath gives life, and connecting the physical with the physical purpose of it in reality to see for real and sound for real who I am for real as the physical and that it is all support.

When and as I see I go into a point of self interest in not caring about what I do to myself or others and thus cause harm due to ignorance, I stop and breath, and realize that every action I take has an equal reaction, and thus I realize I am interconnected to everything and everyone and my actions have consequence.

I commit myself to stop and breath before I go into a point of action, becoming physically here and assessing my next step within the basis of how I would want to be treated and what will be best.

I commit to continue to walk this point of stopping my actions and breathing before I act through accessing my next action in equality and oneness until I am remain here and can direct myself in full consideration of others as myself in what is best.

I commit myself to write out all points that come up that don’t align with equality and oneness and find what the practical solution is to implement this alignment of equality with others in my world.

I commit to become humble within all my interactions with others and reap what I sow eventually which will be a humble self through and through living and pushing physical realizations in self living to all as equals as one life here.

Day 288 – What Does it Mean to Be Gentle With Myself?

So for a moment I am going to look at this point of what it means to be gentle with myself. I was listening to an interview The Metaphysical of Imagination- Transforming Self Judgment into Self Awareness– Part 17 from eqafe today on self judgment and they discussed this point of gentleness with self. And how within self judgment, you are not this way with yourself, but more like a bully and cause harm to yourself. So I was looking at this because being gentle is something I can not relate much at all too. I was looking to see where in my life am I gentle, I came up with being gentle when I pet Henri on the head right over his ears like very gently and slowly, and I take the time to feel and sense the hairs in that area as the hair there are very short and soft. The ears make me consider to be gentle in that spot because of the sensitivity, and I really enjoy doing it because of the awareness that it brings me to because I actually have to stop and consider the pressure, movement, and direction my hand is going in to make sure I don’t hurt his ears or him. And it’s cool to do that, go slow, be aware of my movements, and feel for real the movement of the hair in this case under my hand.

So this is what comes up when I look at the point of myself and gentleness, but it’s in relation to another and not myself, I have never been gentle really with myself, considerate, and slowing down enough to really be in this with myself. The interview supported because I couldn’t even really see how to even do this, like slow down and be gentle, because I am constantly moving in my mind, in my day, and in my actions, so slowing down and allowing me the time to be slow and become aware of myself is like not even an option I would consider, like it’s just not realistic. But I did heed there suggestion, and walked some practical support points to practice slowing down and becoming gentle with myself, it’s not only very cool support to bring awareness to myself and the equality that I deserve as well, but is very relaxing and a point of letting go through a decision to do so through breath, it’s very nice.

So I will continue to apply these tools and see where it is that I can implement this more and more in my living because as a final point I will be much better suited to be gentle and kind with myself rather then harsh and bullying myself which I see I exist more in now as I continue to walk through this particular point with self judgment I have been in earlier blogs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can not be gentle with myself and care for me in awareness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see it as too hard to be aware within breath and focusing on being gentle and taking care of each moment I make to caress me rather then force me, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that it is impossible to slow down and become aware of myself to become gentle and caring with me for real in self awareness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I don’t know how to become gentle with myself and what that even means.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I don’t deserve gentleness because I am too much in my mind and not focused on what is real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel sorry for myself that I have never been or even know how to be gentle with me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to put the effort in to focus and sit with myself and push through the resistances to give up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the gentleness of life as the innocence and fragility of it within what it consists and exsist as, but really the stability and self empowerment that is given to self when self embrace gentleness in its expression of self acceptance.

When and as I see myself go into a point of resisting gentleness and slowing down with myself, I stop and breath, and realize that this is key in becoming stable within myself and finding the self within the mind as awareness.

I commit to slow breathing for a half hour a night and push the awareness of my breath and the touch of my skin to realize and begin to give me the opportunity to let go and become gentle with myself as self-acceptance as this gentleness action I am walking.

I commit to stop the judgment of who I am as gentleness and embrace it as a point of action I can take to bring myself into awareness and stability as the action of gentleness require to see it through to expression brings this to self.

I commit to not give up and walk this through as a gift to myself to stop abuse and embrace me as the equal part of life I am and thus respect this of myself as I give it to myself through being gentle with and for me and thus will have the ability to give to others as I have given it to self.


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