Day 22 - Sleeping for rest or for mind upgardes - i always decide

 

I have been sleeping more and more lately where i been getting up right when i need to leave, which i would like to get some things done before i leave, i see that when i first wake up, my mind is the most active, making it's way to my awareness and pulling me into itself as my self as i start participating in fears of what if. The discipline and self movement in the morning first waking up will set the day up either in more suppression and struggle or self directive will as an expression of creating myself in what is best for me and so all. Its an act of being productive through self movement, a physical get up and go and moving forward, considering my body and all my cells as myself, and in this the understanding that life is not limited in the expression of what self can do and live, there is many potentials of expression each moment. So start with the small as practically there is a limitation of what i can physically do so common sense is needed every moment, and so i practice and live this as what i can do in my day to day and in this it strengthens and builds over time. 

So after sleeping when i open my eyes, i am seeing that there is these fears of dreading the day, what i will face, and if anything uncertain will happen. I find the fears of worst case scenarios will flood my mind and in this i will become weakened in my breathing and in my letting go, i will fall into emotions and start going into self judgments and points that i myself have no control over and do not have full context. Also i have too many things i want to get done so i become unmotivated to do anything because again the belief that its too much or i don't know where to start, all just distractions really and keep me stuck in the past and in thoughts and literally in myself/my bed/physical reality. 

The understanding is to get out of the mind through breathing and letting go of the thoughts, literally let them go, if they continue without the ability to direct, going to writing is suggested to sort out what ever is repeating in ones thoughts/memories, through self investigation and self forgiveness self can flesh it out and figure out how to correct it. It takes a lot of practice, so don't give up as the mind will push this on self often, its desire is energy and not what is best for all life, so self has to take the directive pricniple back and see how to live it for self. That is the beauty of the writing and speaking self forgiveness to understand how to correct self and where, usually self knows cause it's common sense but it will be worked through as one sticks with these tools. I have not yet applied myself satisfactory in this point of letting go and walking as breath, in and out, feeling the breath feed my physical body as i as my physical embrace it and release it back to myself as the earth to them take it in and give it back for me to take in, but i see the point and i am committed to live this as myself until it is done. In essence i am seeing that it's a giving to myself as all here as i do for me i do for others and vise versa as all is one and equal. I am finding to not hold onto to anything, let it go, purify with self forgiveness and recreate self here alwasy in living principles until they are natural, they are self, who you really are, i have separated myself from life for a bit and now i am walking back to life fully, i never was fully lost, but i am actually a whole being as life, no need for separation, we are all one as the same yet equal as beings in living expression. A fascinating real-i-zation indeed and in sound. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to in the morning wake up with the belief that i am doomed for the rest of the day/my life and i have no control over the destruction of what is going to happen based on the thoughts that are coming up as in the world is scary, people are not trustworthy, the world is going to end, we are going to not make it. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame myself for the state of the badness of the world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for the state of this world and go into anger in myself when i wake up about how messed up everything is.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into worst case scenarios within and as me where i am seeing the bad only and not the expression and potentials that exist in each moment as we are here and living in this world.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the what ifs of this reality where life could be this way or could be that way, instead of working with what is here as myself and my self honesty where i stand within a point of self introspection and self forgiveness and let go and move forward. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the past recreating preprogrammed moments of memory that exist here in the present moment that is here and so recreate myself as mind as memory instead of living here and creating myself as life in what is best for all as common sense.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to try and figure things out with my mind instead of letting it go and seeing how life plays out and in this direct in the moment in the principles of life in what is best and doing unto another as how i'd like done onto me and in this live this as myself in the physical not in the mind as thought automation. 

i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the memories and the past because it feels comfortable and safe as i know what to expect and don't need to really push myself beyond my boundaries.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to push myself beyond my boundaries and not stand within a point of life giving and standing within what is best to the best of my ability.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to sleep past my commitment time and not wake up due to the belief of being tired when i see i have gotten rest and i am only participating in my mind as thoughts and memories and thus allowing the mind as emotions/thoughts and feelings take over instead of self directing me here.

I commit myself to let go of the judgment and blame of myself and others, i forgive myself and live in a way of breathing and creating my day.

I commit myself to create my morning with walking up at 6am doing some writing and drinking coffee, along with exercise and prepping for the day.

I commit myself to walk up on my alarm and not stay in bed to rest. 

I commit myself to let go of the thoughts of i am tired as i see i am life and life is not tired and doesn't require to sleep but the body as the physical as me requires rest.

I commit myself to let go of fear and take responsibility for myself and share myself to support others as how i'd like to be supported.

When and as i see i want to go into thoughts and become lazy as automation, i stop and breath, i remain in breath and create myself in a way that is best for all in this moment, i will write when i am not clear and do self forgiveness until i am clear. 

I commit myself to live and do my best and bring and give this to others as a gift i can give and would like to receive as the best living potential for us all. 

more at:

desteni.org

lite.desteni.org

More on Living the Word PEACE - Day 546

Living the word Peace, which I have defined as a reference to be peace - p = patiences, e= emerging, ace = grace. So here it’s peace = patiences emerging as grace. Patiences I have redefined to be paying attention to the essence of life that always exist here in equality and oneness, and grace i have redefined to be grateful pace, which is complimentary to both the words patiences and peace as this grateful pace as grace is a slow, awareness of self, where i become aware of my breath, my movements in my body, and the movements of my world and within this live in an appreciation of the intricacy and majestic nature that is life itself living. Here i have also found that patiences is key because to become aware of what is here and get a point of understanding others and self within it all it takes a patiences of self. I have been practicing this because there is a lot to learn in a way, a lot to practice, a lot to substantiate within self, though this all can be done with a grace and a peace. So this balance of these practices in living words has been a supportive platform to live in more self awareness and awareness of my enviroment becoming integrated in realizing everything that is here is self.

Here it has been fascinating because I am starting to open myself up more to my enviroment, what can i learn about myself and what can i create and live to support others equally as how i would want to be supported, where I am taking notice more of the small, the simple, yet complex and always learning and growing within it as my self. And these principles are also foundational for me in my living, I always have these principles of equality and oneness and what is best for all at the forefront of everything I do as a reminder and a stamp so to speak of how I will live, how I will create, and who I will be as i move myself in my reality. This as a reminder until I am naturally living it as myself, and over time as I practice, these principles and living start to imprint and I start to live it more and more naturally. Though, my mind as the separation that I have accepted and allowed of myself is always here in a sense where I am still walking my process of self honesty, self forgiveness, and self change. I am seeing that within myself that specific words are also supportive to stand through challenge times or overwhelming times where i want to give into emotions or an experience and live out my separation. So in living the word peace i have found in a way I have more and more started to live in this state within myself as I understand myself and more importantly as i correct myself in my living.

But the moments my mind does come in with thoughts where i could be energized by say anger energy and impatiences, living the words peace where it is a solution point of what I want to create for myself instead of the anger, I also am seeing as I transition to this state of being as peace as my solution, I am having to in this moment of the trigger and my decision to either live a word of support or go into the energy and potential for abuse, I have to stand within living words such as integrity, commitment, and honor of life, so these are like reminder words or words I focus on in that moment of decision where I am triggered, am I going to go into it or can i live these words I have put in place to remind me of who I am, where I stand within myself, and what I want to create for myself and this is what i live.

I have also redefined these specific words as well, integrity being my internal grit, where when I live this word I check my inner core and I pull all my muscles tight and I stand up within this core of myself, like a directive decision to stand up straighter inside myself, and I make the decision to let go of the thoughts, state within myself who I am as life, as honor, as integrity, as my commitment to what is best for all life, and I decide to live the word peace, which is where I become patient with myself and others in my world and release the energy hold with a breath. When i release, I see what can i do to support the others and myself to find solutions in this moment and there is solutions that’ll come up automatically as there is always solutions for problems/issues if you are looking for them or you in fact just create them in that moment with using common sense and practical problem solving skills we all have.

So living the word peace has been in a way a stand within myself that I am directing myself to live and move as me as I face challenging moments in my life where i have that decision to decide who I am. I find speaking within myself that I do not accept and allow this thought to direct me, I live integrity here and I live peace, and this will create the movement of being at peace and moving in integrity because I have indeed lived with integrity walking what is best for all rather then giving into my mind and creating abuse in moments and the gift with living in such a way is a state of living in peace cause I created it for myself in real time.


For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below.

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Self Supportive Material -
www.Eqafe.com

Forum support:
www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life
https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4404004

Competition In MY KNEE - Day 543

Photo By: Sylvia Gersson 

For more supportive photos, click here

I noticed after finishing my swim for tonight, I had a pain on my left k-nee(d), it felt like it was buckling in and this prompted me to lie down and investigate it further. What came up was a point of competition I was particpating in while myself and another swimmer where next to each other in the lanes, we kept passing each other and I was fighting myself to stop pushing myself to go fast and try and pass him and be the winner who get’s to the end of the lane first. I looked further into this and found that this pattern is one I participate in a lot and it’s a need to succeed and accomplish something, competition in sports is a great outlet for this pattern because it’s so clear the goal and a great chance of success. What pattern I saw existent within this desire to win, succeed, and accomplish things is a need to be valued by others and especially by myself, I am very competitive with myself, where if I do not succeed or grow within my life, I will create a depression type experience where I believe myself to be less valued, less worthy, and so lastly not able to compete, keep up, and survive in this world. So fear of survival is at the core of this pattern, where I believe myself to be only worthy or valued in this life if I am able to contribute something and compete to show I can, and within that seeking the best to feel better about myself.

What I didn’t realize is that this pattern is being fueled exclusively by my participation within it, there is a part of me that is seeking this feeling and this experience of being the best, being seen by others as worth something, and being able to within myself feel victorious in all that is able to be gained through being at the top and the best in a specific task or field. So my ego and self interest are equally pulsating as me in my actions and behaviors to move me in an intensity to succeed though within it I become unstable with fear of loss and fear of rejection at the same time. What I have learned through moving myself more and more into physical self directed movement is that there is a stability gained through living physically here that is unwavering in a way based on the very fact that I myself am creating the stability through what I have already lived and continue to live in each moment as my stand and my commitment. It is me, so I know and understand who I am within it which breeds clarity within self and thus stability in my enviroment.


When I go into ego, all bets are off as in self interest and ego you lose focus of the physical and of yourself, and you start drifting in thought streams that will take you with energy attached to them and then your on a roller coaster. So I have found that the stability of living my words, changing myself in my highest potential, and doing what is best is the best way to go as it’s the most certain and creates the most stability within self to create how I see fit.

I will walk some self forgiveness on competition and self interest:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate in my ego in self interest of being the best within my swimming today due to wanting to impress the man i was swimming against so I could feel worthy if we were to interact as he would know that I am a good athlete and thus I am accomplished in something in my life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen by others as accomplished and good at things in my life because within myself i am feeling as if i am lacking in some way or another due to thoughts that I need to be better, i am not good enough, there are so many others who are better, and so create an experience that I am not as good and thus I will not be able to live the life i desire.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a fear of survival in this world due to what i have imprinted in my life where i see that you have to be good at something, and within this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself to the life expression that exist within myself and so exist within all that is creative within it’s very expression, and so i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to suppress my and others creative expressions due to this belief that some are inherently great at things and those who are not are not as worthy and so subject to life in compromise.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to live in to this belief that some are inherently better then others due to what they can do, what they say, what they look like, and so create this separation with everything that exist by putting everything in a box as good or bad and wrapping energy around this box pulsating positive or negative energy depending what i have programmed into myself to within that be able to have the high from time to time.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself in believing that separation exists in this world and so live into the survival system that was designed so I could feed off of the weak to be able to give myself a high once in a while, feeding off of addictive patterns within myself showing my own weaknesses, and being ok with a diminished and self compromised existence as life here in what is best in oneness and equality is able to be lived and is already here as me, though i must stand one and equal to it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into addictions within myself as highs and so equally participate and live out the lows pretending that i don’t know what I am doing, when all the while I have been fooling myself and creating conflict in all areas of my life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i am not good enough due to an inherent belief that my dad is the top of my world and I would have to be like him to succeed though fearing this because i did not like the way my dad conducts himself in his words and behaviors.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to attach the words accomplished, confident, strength, and courage to my dad and equally resist it because i don’t like my dad’s way of living.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself due to this belief that i have to be like my dad when i see, realize, and understand we are each walking our own individual processes here and I have the ability to direct myself in my best and within that i have free creative expression to do what I will, it’s all up to me and directed and defined by me.

When and as I see I am going into a form of self interest as ego wanting something or being driven to do something, I stop and breath, and realize I am activating my mind competition and so create chaos and instability in my world through play outs and timelines that will bring me back to the same point of self diminishment and feeling unworthy. I realize I have to walk the physical timeline of proving myself in my living that I am able to change myself into living words that are best for all and so best for me with the clear directive to walk myself change into a unique and individual expression that is boundless in the potentials of my abilities and creation.

I commit myself to walk the letting go of the desire to accomplish and succeed and walk the living word process of creation and self change as I move myself into pursuits of my own creation that I direct and push in the purposes of what is best for all and expressing myself in new ways that work.

I commit myself to let go of the belief that i am unworthy as I see this is created from thoughts and thoughts do not define me as I am not defined by a belief, I am defined by my living in what i create here and for what purposes.

I commit myself to push myself into the new redefined word of competition in pushing my self creative process into more expansive ways to move this process to life further to support more and more and walk what is best for all.

I commit myself to let go of the relationship with my dad as my director in my life and put myself in that position in self responsibility to not only walk my process to life in the best of my ability but allow others to walk theres and realize i am not responsible for everyone making it, each one is that for themselves.

I commit myself to push myself to move beyond my limitations and support where I am able to though allow others to walk their own process as this is where self growth and empowerment is born.

For more on how to walk the process of becoming physical and doing what is best, check out the links below.

Earth Haven - Sustainable Living Environments -
Built on the Principles of What is best for all Life
https://www.patreon.com/user?u=4404004

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Self Supportive Material -
www.Eqafe.com

Forum support:
www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

How I Learned to Trust Myself with the Desteni I Process - Day 536

 

I discuss in this audio how I learned how to trust myself. I was quite an insecure person with little self trust, now standing within myself in self trust and confidence on a mission to support self change and the world to change in the best way possible. This to support and teach all to become stewards of the earth so we can all learn to live in decency and dignity.

Check out the links for more on the process at desteni:

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!

www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material - 

www.Eqafe.com

Forum support: 

www.forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki: 

wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

www.facebook.com/DIPLite

More on Where I stand with Self Trust? Day 527

When looking at my relationship with the words self trust, I have for a long time been doubting myself, this creating a feeling or an experience within me that I am not doing enough, and this belief of not doing enough is causing unneeded stress in my already busy lifestyle. One point that I see here that I can look at is this experience of not doing enough, because in many ways I do do a lot, I work full time and have many extra responsibilities that I am working on. Though within this, I still feel like I could be giving my time to more things, more activities, more projects to push ahead and spearhead my future creation of what my ideals are. In this spearheading, I see I am missing two very important dimensions and this is the time dimension, meaning what it takes to walk something into creation and also the understanding dimension, where I at this stage do not have enough information or still require to walk a process of self creation/living to specify and define who and what I indeed would like to create and so understand how to actually create this within and as myself. So pushing for something in my mind such as doing more, I see is counterproductive to the actual self creation process I could be and have to walk to create that which I would like to live in my highest potential.

So some points I need to consider is why I am not moving on these points that I want to change, and many of the shortcomings are addictions I have in my day to day living. Addictions that I am afraid to let go of, and within this afraid of change. So here I require to make a plan and move within this plan, so I can indeed create. Because if I don't start changing what is created is a resonance or presence of self compromise as I am not moving myself where I know and understand I indeed can. So if one is not creating self, then one will then actually be creating self compromise and thus self diminishment as I are actually accepting and allowing it, I have created all of it through thoughts, reactions, and living in separation as these beliefs, ideas, reactions, ect.

What I have learned over the years of walking the desteni I process is not to judge myself for these types of process points I have to walk, it is not to create any reaction toward self, but to understand the point, why it occurred, and then simple walk the correction path to change it. This is the most efficient way I have found as there is nothing gained by judging self for failing or becoming harsh with self, as this literally only causes diminishment within self, so really it doesn’t make sense. Though if you see you are judging yourself, walk the tools of self forgiveness, self correction, and change self within this to then stabilize, so the tools are incredible, simplistic, and specific to move self in this process in whatever point or process of the mind or self compromise one face. Again, process is a process of self understanding and self creation through self correction, so it will take time, patiences, and lots of mistakes, but overtime and as one persevere change will start to occur.

Here I will write self forgiveness on doubt:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a doubt about who I am and how I am living based on an energetic experience coming up of anxiety through thoughts that I am not doing enough.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into an energetic possession of fear based on a belief of if i don’t do enough and I lack and lag behind I will not be able to catch up thus squandering my chances to become life here in the physical and so fearing annihilation in the afterlife.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thought that I am going to be annihilated if I stop pushing myself so hard and believe that i within this I will not be able to catch up.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to keep score of who is who within this process and how far i have walked and within this create a polarity of best and worst causing separation and comparison with my environment.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create a separation with my environment due to the belief that I am not going to be able to keep up with others thus comparing myself to others creating this race experience in the first place which I see, realize, and understand is not real.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create the experience that I am in a race and I must finish and do the best because of a fear of survival where I see, realize, and understand this is stemming from childhood where I would compete with my siblings to be seen, heard, and validated by my parents and so always strive to be the best.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to my siblings and believe I am only safe if I am seen as the best and validated by what i have done and could do by my parents in praise or admiration, and within this define who I am based on these words and praises.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to create a belief that I have to win and be the best to be able to survive and become somebody in this reality that’ll be safe and survive, and so within this create a belief that this is the only way it is and I only know who I am based on what my environment is saying to me.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give my power away to the external world I was living in believing that that is who defines me, when i see, realize, and understand that I miss the fact that who i am is based on my own self creation and within this I am limitless to the potentials that I can create within and through my own self will and self awareness.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to become stuck within the words and energies of others in my environment as something or someone that defines me, when I see, realize, and understanding I am giving permission for it to define me as I am accepting and allowing it to define who I am as I am believing it is true.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself within not enough based on comparison and beliefs of self diminishment or self validation based on the instability of the outside world and the corruptness of the inner self creation process that this has on who I am actually creating myself into, someone who is separated and not stable within who I am as self here in self honesty.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to take on others beliefs, emotions, energies, and words as who I am instead of investigating these words for myself, and redefining them in words that I understand for me and thus can live for me.

When and as I see myself moving into a point of self diminishment within my self living by accepting and allowing any point outside myself to define who I am, I stop and breath, and i realize that I am able to define who I am through redefining my understanding of the word(s) and so living within this redefinition process so I create me from self understanding and self awareness.

I commit myself to stop and breath when I see I go into a movement of either positive or negative based on an outside influence and correct myself into understanding the word for myself through redefining it and living it for me.

I commit myself to let go of the beliefs that I am defined by my past where i believed i had to compete to move into the process of equality and oneness of all life, and creating myself breath by breath through my own self awareness movement.

I commit myself to stop judging and creating separation with what is here, move into understanding, and finding solutions for what is here in the highest potentials possible.

I commit myself to move from self doubt as not enough to slowing down and walking what is here in each moment to the best of my ability.

I commit myself to move from self doubt as diminishing to self creation as expansion.



More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material -
http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course -
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support:
http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki:
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page:
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group:
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ...

DIP Lite on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Where Do I Stand within Self Trust? - Day 526

Where am I at in terms of my self trust? I am finding my relationship in general with myself has always been one of doubt, of not being enough, of self judgment, and within that this has created a breeding ground for the mind as doubt to creep in and wreak havoc on my self stability. What I do know of myself and my living participation is that I am determined to walk the correction of who and how I am as life, though this is a path of unknowns as well as uncertainties. I do find self empowerment within walking through fears and the unknown and persevering to a point of relative self stability again, this I have done with many points, but this journey never ends. Eventually I see it ending when all are life here and heaven has been created on earth, but until that time, I walk my mind dimensions, my fears, my dark self into the physical living correction as my thought, word, and deed.

Another point I have realized is that which is best described in a saying, “no man is an island”, meaning I can not walk this process to life in what is best for all alone, I do need cross-referencing and support to understand myself as the evil I have accepted and allowed myself to be and become. It’s a process, that is why it’s called desteni i process, the i of self has to walk a self purification process and this is walked until its done for real. I see the potential and I see the magnificence that this outflow that is inevitable for all to face and transcend, this potential is always here, though it’s up to myself to walk this for myself as life. Though this is where my doubt comes in, am I able to walk to life or am I just too fucked up to get this done?

The ego is a strong self force one has created as a separate illusionary self to distract and separate ourselves from our own creation, this force of self is so strong it can completely catch me off guard, and yes through walking self creation, one will inevitably create self in ways that is not best as a process of mistakes, learning from one’s mistakes, and growth as this is part of learning and this is part of life. The one point though that I have been facing is ensuring I don’t focus to much on my mistakes and down falls and so within this judge myself for it. What I call the ego or even can be seen as a dark self within where I will participate in the thoughts of self judgment for instance and within this this can spiral into judging others, blaming others, and even living out that blame through my behavior by yelling for instance. So this dark force of self is what is being taken on by all walking the desteni i process. Though it can not be feared or judged as this will continue the spiral of self compromise and sabotage, so what I have found and been walking is self responsibility, understanding that I alone am creating these experiences within myself and so I have and must take responsibility for them, to then be able to understand them, forgive them, and walk the process of change. This is a process that takes time and patiences as again mistakes will be made, consequences will have to be outflowed and walked, and from there I get back up and continue to learn and grow.

I keep coming back to the same point that has supported me throughout my journey to life within walking my mind system(s) and this has been the point of never giving up. I know that there is a point of uncertainty within this because within myself in the last few years of my process with walking the desteni tools I have been challenged in ways that i couldn’t have conceived, I did at times believe I was going to give up, I wanted to with most all of my being, though there was always that point of when i got myself back to breath, back to my stability here within my physical body, and investigated what had happen and why, I would realize that I am still here and I am still able to walk, I still trust myself to be able to walk the correction, and I would move. I was always moving, I am always moving, inside myself, observing, understanding myself, understanding others, making mistakes, getting back up, learning, expanding, failing, getting back up, bringing myself back to breath, walking and walking is what I do, always moving back to the basics, my breath, my physical reality stability, my self forgiveness, my self correction, and my pushing of myself beyond my limitations in my living always in all ways I see necessary to bring myself closer to life and a world that is best for all.

This is for sure challenging, but it is doable, I am an example as there are so many others that this is doable, I have changed, I have expanded, I have grown in my self awareness and my integrity, and I realize and am aware that there is still so much more to go. Each step counts and each moment of change put forth toward your self growth and doing what is best counts, so this is where I will leave you, make it count, do your best, and lets create a world that is best for all where heaven comes to earth, where it is real.

My self trust is an expanding process, but what I see and understand that every step here into the best I can be by facing challenges and moving through them with a self integrity in doing my best in self honesty, I move more and more into my stability of being able to trust myself. It’s a process I am finding of expanding awareness and it only expands as I live it, so I will continue to live self trust and move into my highest potential for life in oneness and equality and what is best for all.

Thanks for reading.

More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!
http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Self Supportive Material - 
http://www.Eqafe.com 

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 
http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com 

Forum support: 
http://forum.desteni.org 

Desteni Wiki: 
http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page 

Eqafe Facebook Page: 
https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136... 

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 
https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ... 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 
https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Eqafe Hangout: The Pace of Breath - What does this mean? - Day 513

In this hangout we are going to discuss the Kryon series - The Pace of Breath interview:

https://eqafe.com/p/the-pace-of-the-b...

We will be discussing how we often go into emotional overwhelming experiences, and where do these come from sometimes seemingly out of nowhere?

Also what parts of the mind are involved with emotional overwhelmingness experience?

What are the relationship dynamics going on within the body and mind interactions that cause such experiences of emotional overwhelmingness to occur and with such intensity?

What support is available within the interview and the hangout guests experiences of walking the desten-i-process to move themselves from a point of mind emotional overwhelmingness to self awareness in self empowerment?

What tools are available to support one to get out of the mind emotions and empower oneself to have self control?

For More Support on the Desteni I Process, please check out Links below:

Self Supportive Material - 

http://www.Eqafe.com

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

http://www.lite.desteniiprocess.com

Forum support: 

http://forum.desteni.org

Desteni Wiki: 

http://wiki.destonians.com/Main_Page

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

https://www.facebook.com/Eqafe-359136...

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/journ... 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

https://www.facebook.com/DIPLite

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!

http://www.schoolofultimateliving.com/

Moving Beyond the Personality - Day 469

For context to this blog, please read my previous blog:
Making the Mind Personal – Day 468

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make my mind personal and believe that what I am seeing, following as thoughts, believing as true, and reacting to in conflict is who I really am and that nothing is able to be changed because this is just to overwhelming.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that what I am experiencing within and as my mind is too overwhelming to deal with and that I am enslaved and being over taken by it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am not able to direct myself within my mind when I have seen, realize, and understood that within my self will I have stopped my mind, energy, thoughts, beliefs, and stood within principles of what is best and life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that the mind is too powerful within it’s systematic way that I can’t foresee what is to happen and what to expect next, when I see, realize, and understand that the tools of self support and self directiveness is always here as breath, principles, and my own self will in which I have proven in time how to stand for myself and stand within life principles.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the past, present, and future of my mind where I go into thinking about this and that instead of realizing, seeing, and understanding that what is here is not thinking, but living and so within living, I am here and thus am able to empower myself through my own will to live and change in what is best for all through living words and support platforms that move myself into breath by breath living and directing myself in the here moment to solutions that are best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear losing the ability to think and have the mind to fall back on as I have used it in ways to not face parts of myself that I have denied and suppressed and so letting go of the mind and living as breath, the responsibility of myself is here and living in self honesty is to be proven.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making a mistake and falling within my self and life living process, and so I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to blame my mind or others within an attempt to thwart my responsibility and consequence of outflows I have created within my life and so perpetuate abuse rather then walking the correction process and supporting life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the mind and blame it for what is happening as the consequences in my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take full responsibility for myself as my living and what I have created and so I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to stand as the correction process here in each moment as I walk in this process through the mind as myself and into a correction process to live life here as breath.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the mind as a safety net and not move beyond my fears to live here and direct myself as my life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my life personal and what happens to me or what doesn’t and go into blame.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my living word here and create separation and abuse.

I commit myself to take full responsibility of my mind as I move into a slow down correction process of myself as real time application.

I commit myself to live self response-ability in each here moment where I embrace my life and walk it into a correction process each and every moment as it comes.

I commit myself to slow down in moments of patterned behavior such as voice rising or thoughts repeating and do self forgiveness out loud to clear it.

I commit myself to speak correction statements to navigate my living here into a support of what is best for all in my living.

I commit myself to live words into the physical that are supportive for all, consider all involved, and honor the life within all.

I commit myself to see all equally and embrace this as myself within all that I do.

I commit myself to live breath by breath and move the energy back to the earth and walk the correction process that is best for all. 

More Support for the topic of Taking the Mind Personal:
Insecurity: Going Deeper: Introduction - Atlanteans – Part 248
Self Sabotage: Nature & Design - Atlanteans - Part 285
Moving from Taking Things Personally to Personal Responsibility - Reptillians Part 224
Self Sabotage: Personality System - Atlanteans - Part 286

Check Out these Awesome supportive sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Walking This Process
Destonian Social Network
Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site

Making the Mind Personal – Day 468

 Photo Source

I have as of recently being looking at this point in my process where I have been making my mind more then it really is, where I stress and go into great emotions based on what is coming up within me as my thoughts, reactions, and behavior in my life. I realize this is the purpose of the mind, so from that perspective, I am acting just as I programmed it. And this is the point that I have been starting to realize more and more as it has been said over many times throughout my process walking with Desteni, this understanding that what is coming up in relation to myself and how I am thinking or behaving is programs, it is not personal in terms of it does not define me as a being, it is what has been programmed over time by myself without really realizing or having the tools to support myself to stop it.

Now walking the desetni I process, I have learned much about my own mind and the programs that I have created for myself, every so now and then, I get through a point or am faced with a point that really challenges my stand within this understanding of what I am experiencing is just programs, they are not really who I am. These programs come with energy, so it’s not only thoughts that I have to let go of in terms of reacting to them, I also have to let go of the energy that is attached to these thoughts. This has been a challenge due to the fact that the energy feels so real and feels so intense, and the immediate belief and idea of what is happening is that this is real, I need to react in this energy, I need to react to these thoughts and participate in them because this is really how it is, but through time and through my own investigation in writing and my correction process, I realize beyond this belief and idea of what is real, that reality is always here stable, physical, and in a way that is factual and able to be mathematically understood. 

Though, this realizing of the fact that I am not my mind or my programs in the sense that I can change myself, reprogram myself to live in a way that is best for all, and I can really move beyond what I think I could do through realizing that what is coming up as patterns of thoughts can be changed, the emotions that exist in moments can be let go of, and the behavior can be reformed into living that is supportive for myself and others to live more harmoniously and cohesively. It’ll take work and dedication, this is for sure, though the beliefs I have created about myself and what my mind has brought up at times that I don’t want to accept, is not to be taken personally, but understood that it’s just a programmed system. It’s not personal, it’s not defining me, I can only define myself and so I realize I can create myself in a new way. This is what desteni is about and why we are here, it’s a point to give a platform to support us to walk a reprogramming process of how self created myself through time and direct myself into a new way of life that is within principles that are one and equal with life and best for everyone, so the opportunity to live to our utmost potential is here. This I am grateful for, we are not defined by anything but by who we are in each moment, and this is a self creation process, so let’s create of ourselves in what is best and walk the process this will take until it is done, this is my focus.

Self Forgiveness and self commitments to follow in my next blog, thanks for reading.

More Support for the topic of Taking the Mind Personal:
Insecurity: Going Deeper: Introduction - Atlanteans – Part 248
Self Sabotage: Nature & Design - Atlanteans - Part 285
Moving from Taking Things Personally to Personal Responsibility - Reptillians Part 224
Self Sabotage: Personality System - Atlanteans - Part 286

Check Out these Awesome supportive sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Walking This Process
Destonian Social Network
Self and Living Store
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site