Day 116- What is True Courage?

Looking today at this point of courage, what is true courage within myself and who I am within what I face in the mirror of my world and this world at large. I see within self that it will take great courage to walk what is being walked within the process at desteni, as I have found, because it is facing everything of yourself, all parts, especially the parts that I have dug deep within to never look at and have to really face.

I realize though that within this taking the journey to life and walking the process at desteni, is that those who are courageous will be the ones who walk, will be the ones who push through all the challenges and fears and struggles that will be faced, and will birth as life. The courageous ones will be those who stand in the face of the abusers and walk what has to be walked to bring about a world best for all, and use what is here, and what has been learned through self determination and will to see that nothing less then what is best for all is established and understood within all and by all. This is not an easy road to walk and as in one of Bernard Poolman’s recent blogpost, it will be the road less traveled, not to say that this is a point of defeatism, but simply a point of understanding as we are walking the re-disgn of everything we have ever beLIEved about ourselves as human beings and as life.

Now, the question I have been avoiding for quite some time, will I be the courageous one, and the answer within me has always been yes, this is what I have been waiting my life to do, walk the correction of myself into a person who can stand, be confident, be educated, be able to face anyone with reason and common sense, and stand up for life and all those who are suffering be a part and a help in creating this world in the best way possible for all equal as one. It’s not a question to who I am, but it’s the point of walking this as myself, stopping the irrelevant thoughts and backchat that make me miss reality here and become enslaved to the mind where in I submit and disregard life because of fear and self interest.

I am not willing nor stand to be an abuser nor accept and allow abuse in my world or this world at large, I will walk as the courageous one, who will put an end to the abuse of this world and create a reality where life is within all and all are living as equals as it should be in support and comfort as expressions of the gift that is ourselves, individual life beings with an opportunity to walk this path to life, where courage will be life as we have walked the courageous path to a new world and discard the old that was nothing, but cowardly slaves addicted to self interest and greed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to stop me from being courageous in where I do not accept and allow anything less then the full dedication of myself to walk this path to life where I face all points, including and most especially the points that are suppressed and deep within that I have always been afraid to face.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to stop in the face of abuse towards myself or others because I feared being abused as well and thus allowed the abuse to continue where in I could have been a point of support to help settle the conflict or stop the abuse outright.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see courage within points of winning and doing things within competition, where I become seen as better then others, to thus be seen in self interest, where in I won’t help the being to simply help and support, but do it in a point of wanting glorification and desire to be noticed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the idea of courage as a point of self interest where in I can gain over others and be seen in a specific way I desire of being the best, but this is not true courage as it is not done in the interest of all to stop abuse in this world, but is an act for my own self glorification and self interest.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to take responsibility for myself and push myself through the resistance to face myself because of self judgment, where in I see myself as less then who I really am, but within this never actually seeing myself in reality for real as who I am, because I am in my mind in illusion which has no base in reality and no end in sight, until I end it, here the problem and the solution = me facing me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make a mountain out of a mole hole where in where I go into a point of overwhelmingness when I simply can look at the point within realistic terms, make a plan of action in common sense, and walk the path in steps, use the management tool of one step at a time within the living of one breath at a time, and walk and live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when a point comes that is ‘challenging’ it is not a point to fear nor shy away from, but it’s the point that needs to be faced as the ‘challenge’ within it, it is showing that I have always accepted myself to fall and go into the easy route by just skimming by based on the resistance, but here when it comes to points that I will face in my process, I will walk through them and face them, and do the necessary correction to walk as a courageous one and stop the abuse in my world and then eventually to the world at large as this is what is needed in this world, courageous people willing to walk to a new world that is best for all, which will not be easy, but be worth all the difficulties that will come.

 I commit myself to face the fear with in and stop the fear where in I understand the point by investigating and finding a way to see how it is created, thus fear will not be an issue as I will see it for what it is, and thus I commit myself to walk all the points that I fear for instances in self investigation that is needed to understand myself as the mind, so thus I can walk my process and get to a stability point where in I can take more responsibility in this process to change the world to a life we all can enjoy where everyone is supported and equality in all ways is the law.

I commit myself to walk all points that will stop abuse in my world and then the world at large, in where, I face what has to be faced and walk the point of courage no matter what has to be walked, only living by what is best for all life in common sense practical calculations and movements, and stopping all fear to face what is here.

I commit myself to walk courage within the paths of what is best for all in where I face what has to be faced in all areas of my life, to be able to gain stability within myself and self trust, so I can become a being who is self responsible and dependable to always do what is beast for all.

I commit myself to walk the point of self accountability and self honesty where in I face myself in all points and thus use the courage within myself to walk the dark dungeons of my mind, so it can be revealed and forgiven.

I commit myself to humble myself within my process of understanding who I am as life and learning the unconditional support and giving that life itself has given me in all areas of this natural world, and so walk the courage to face what has been done in greed and self interest by myself, and stand and correct it so it will never be allowed again.

I commit myself to stop giving relevance to irrelevant points within my mind, and walk the path of stopping all participation within the mind layers, through understanding it as me, and deleting it to stop the self judgments until it’s done.

I commit myself to stop the point of becoming overwhelmed and thus go into a point of disappointment, by managing my time effectively, and handling points within common sense understanding and resolution.

I commit myself to walk the path of the courageous one where in I make real the message of Jesus of give to another as I would want for myself, and correct all the points that will be faced in all ways, and walk through it by using my breath as stability, and pushing myself always to expand and grow never settling until life is here and we are in fact equal in all ways as life.

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courageous, true courage, jesus's message, golden rule, changing the world, best for all life, solutions, end abuse, education, Bernard Poolman, desteni, equal life, new world, journey to life, 2012,

Day 115- Self Sabotage Character: Judging My Backchat – Self Corrective Statements

I commit myself to stop the judging of the back thoughts in my mind the moment I see that I go into judgment, through using my breath and saying ‘stop, delete’, continuing this until the judging and thoughts stops.

I commit myself to stop the point of self sabotage within the point of seeing that I am having certain thoughts, where I stop the judgment of myself for having thoughts as I realize and see that the thoughts are me, and thus I can direct them once I accept them as me, so they stop having power over me.

I commit myself to stop the polarity playout of bad/good thoughts, and thus see direct of what the thought is, so thus I can self forgive it, and stop the participation in it within seeing it as me and thus simply changing the starting point. So I commit to stop the point of separation with the thought in having a feeling towards it, stopping the friction of facing it, so thus it can be faced and walked through.

I commit myself to walk the understanding of the mindconsciousness system in where I see and thus can direct the thought creation to be equal and one with it, so thus I can direct it by stopping the participation in it, and through understanding it, I will essentially become it as the creator in full awareness, and then be able to walk it into the starting point of self honesty by stopping all the separation and walking what is best for all here as breath, to eventually having no thoughts as I am here as the physical.

I commit myself to observe and thus become clear with the origins of what the back chat is, so I can see it and thus when it comes about again I can see it for what it is and realize that it is not who I want to live as, and so direct the back chat by stopping the participation in it through deleting it, and from here walk into the physical more by letting the thoughts as back chat go through obviously the tools of writing, self forgiveness, and selfcorrection in living.

I commit myself to walk self discipline in all parts of my world and including this point of stopping my thoughts through direcly stopping it, until it ends.

I commit myself to stop all points of self sabotage, by stopping the participation in this character that was activated as self pity in this point, and thus walk what I have to face as myself as my backchat through writing and self correction until it is done.

I commit myself to stop all emotional and feelings related to my backchat and thus stop energizing it through my reacting to it with energy, and thus stopping the life of the back chat by ending this relationship of me giving the thoughts energy.

I commit myself to stop denying what is in my mind and take responsibility for it and face it, write it out, do self forgiveness, and stop participating in it when it come up, accepting it as me and simply realizing that it needs to stop as it supports nothing that is life.

I commit myself to walk through the fear I have towards the thoughts I create and the mind, and realize that there is nothing to fear as it is what it is, and simply face it and breath, and walk the correction, that is the only way to stop it and correct the point, by facing me as it.

I commit myself to push to stop the judgment of the thoughts and thus breath through all physical reactions, realizing the trigger points, and thus walk the acceptance and thus the correction by ending the participation within it by simply letting go of the attachment to the thoughts through breathing and stopping it by deleting the point after the writing of the point is complete.

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self judgment, self help, stopping self hate, self commitment, change, life obstacles, self will, self correction, back chat, secret mind, desteni, journey to life, 2012, eqafe

Day 114 – Self Sabotage Character: Judging My Backchat

Here looking at this point that I see quite often and it’s judging the thoughts that are going through my head. Practically speaking, it’s not very beneficial for me to judge my own thoughts as they are here, and thus I am thinking them, so there is not much that can be changed about that fact. But the fact that I go and observe the thought, and then judge myself here for having these thoughts I am seeing within mind, and then sabotaging myself because of them, seeing myself as twisted or demented for having these thoughts in my mind, I see that I can not and do not at this point practically have the directive will to stop these thoughts as I am judging them, thus I will continue to sabotage myself because I am giving myself no path to a solution to stop the thoughts, because I am the solution and thus I am sabotaging my path to the solution which is through and as me.

So here going to walk out some self forgiveness on this point of judging my back chat thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the thoughts that are in my mind within the moment they are happening.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the thoughts in my mind in the moment they are happening and within that judge myself as some how demented or abnormal for having these thoughts go through.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the thoughts in my mind in the moment they go through in a way that is no support to me as it sabotage my standing as I go into self diminishment based on seeing it in a negative way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the thoughts in my mind in the moment and diminish who I am not realizing that these thoughts are generated over a life time through an actual programmed system as the mind as consciousness that is aware of it’s role, and thus seek to enslave the being who is the life that is me, to keep alive and survive.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to perpetuate the back chat thoughts that are not supportive to life by not directing them but going into a self pity and sabotaging myself to separate myself even more into the mind where in I make it more difficult for myself unnecessarily where in I could stop the sabotage and walk the appropriate tools of self honesty, self forgiveness, and then follow through by changing in my living, but instead diminish myself by judging the thoughts, and making my process longer then it has to be.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push my self discipline in my living, and thus fall back into the mind patterns of sabotage and self diminishment by judging the thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the self pity character where in I will deliberately sabotage myself so I don’t have to face myself and how I am in my backchat thoughts as I am ashamed of the thoughts that are there.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have shame for the thoughts that are in my head as this give no direction to what I have to do in terms of equalizing myself with the thoughts, and so I realize that the shame is just an indication that I am in self judgment and thus self sabotage as I see and understand the thoughts are me, and thus to change them and direct them I have to accept them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deny the thoughts that are in my mind because of the fear I have of what others will think of me if they knew the thoughts that I was thinking of them, and thus through this fear sabotage myself as a bad person and demented as I judge the thoughts as bad and demented. I realize and see though that these thoughts and fears are not real, and thus I, from this realization, can walk the correction by seeing the thoughts and fears for what they are- mind patterns generated by my participation in energy, and allowing myself to change so thus I let go of the reactions to the thoughts, and thus stop giving the thoughts life through the participation I give it through energy when I react to it by stopping and walking through the fears of others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a polarity playout of my thoughts where in I judge the thoughts that I see are darker and more secret mind thoughts especially of others as me being bad, evil, sick in where I go into a physical reaction of like a shock and my stomach gets tight as I fear the thought of them finding out, and thus suppress the thoughts and discard them to the back of my mind where in I don’t have to face the thought, but essentially can hide from it another day. I realize here though that this will only prolong my process and my self freedom as life, as suppressing and judging the thoughts do nothing to support myself, and do everything for the mind as that enslaves me more into separation and self diminishment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into fear of the thoughts I have instead of accepting the thoughts as me, and writing out the self forgiveness to stop the thoughts, and so I can walk equal with others here as life as who we are and stop diminishing myself by judgments and fears, and walk whatever correction is necessary to stand in equality with all life.

Self corrective statements to follow.

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self hate, back chat, secret mind, secret thoughts, secret diary, the secret, backstabbing, friendship, self sabotage, thinking, i think, mind possessed, shame, desteni, journey to life, 2012, eqafe

Day 113- Never Forget Self Corrective Statements

I commit myself to walk in all contexts and points I am able to, the Equal Money System, which will physically, practically ensure that a new system is put in place that create the value of life equal to money to support all here on this earth in a way that is best for all.

I commit myself to stop all points of war and actions of death in this world to make profit and income by creating a world where life is not dependent on profit and money value, so all are supported and the war and killing of life will cease to exist as it’s not necessary as making profit will end and desire for more will end as all that is wanted is given freely for all to share in equality through creating a new system that has equality and oneness of all life as it's principle foundation, which the equal money system will.

I commit myself to walk the path of ending the fictious beings we put our faith in to not have to take responsibility for what is here, but allow the perpetuation of abuse. So thus I commit myself to take responsibility for myself in all areas of my life so I am the director of myself, and thus I can direct myself as life to common sense solutions and be an example so others can do the same.

I commit myself to stop all points of inequality and self interest within myself by giving to all as I would want for myself, sharing everything so thus everything is able to be given freely and thus I will benefit equally as well, so it's a win win for all as how it should be.

I commit myself to walk all points of polarities as comparisons and ego desires to thus be able to stand here in equality with all as the physical for real, stopping self interest in all areas to thus give to the interest of all so all will benefit equally.

I commit myself to only walk what life is here as me in equal value among all in what is best for all stopping all points of definitions or any separation based on any point of the mind.

I commit myself to treat all life as I would like to be treated as I have realized that to abuse life is to abuse myself and thus based on this common sense assessment, I would not like to be abused so thus I will stop all abuse to others as I wouldn't want for myself.

I commit myself to create a system as the equal money system to stop all points of survival and thus walk all solutions to create all areas of life where all are supported in practical common sense ways through the medium as money and resources in honor and respect of the life that is within and as all that is here.

I commit myself to create and thus help walk a system as the equal money system that will create all ways and means of sustainability and recyclability to thus create the best support systems for all life, so thus we can prosper and expand in honor and integrity of all life in all ways through respecting the life that is here as source as the physical and expanding within it's utmost potential.

I commit myself to stop the self interest glorification of the mind as me, and walk the life that is here in equal regard and respect of all, to create a world that honor life instead of disregard it and abuse it due to self interest.

I commit myself to walk this process until life is one and equal and we have a system in place, as the equal money system, that will support all life here in what is best for all by living this and creating this living within myself through walking the tools of self honesty, self investigation,self forgiveness, and self correction until it’s here as me. 

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self commitment, end war, end abuse, death, killing, stop fighting, conflict resolution, world solutions, human machine, never forget, 9/11, human atrocities, crimes against humanity, life, desteni, 2012

Day 112 – Never Forget

Within this statement, we have used this point of ‘never forget’ within the context of never forgetting a particular heinous action done by one group of humans onto another, killing, maiming, harming, brutalizing, raping, and this can be seen with all actions against life, but this is only seen within published killings such as 9/11 world tower killings or events such as the holocaust, but this is being done over and over everyday within every place in this world. We use these words ‘never forget’ as a remembrance but in fact it’s a remembrance to seek revenge, we will never forget who attacked us, so thus we can keep fresh in our minds, the death, destruction, and dysfunction of a society that is driven to hate each other and so we can get our revenge to do the same. But this cause absolute dysfunction and devolution in this world because we never go to the origins and source of how and why this hate and abuse emerged in the first place to make the human annihilate against each other and all life that exist.  Money in this world not given to all equally and allowed all life to be supported  as life as one within all is the cause to the hell that is here, because oneness and equality of ALL life is not honored and respected within all, and thus inequality rule and we can see it everywhere.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make money more valued and powerful then life itself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to kill in the name of god but in truth kill in the name of my god as money to have more and take from those that have what I want.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a fictious being in the sky to blame for my actions or inactions in the atrocities that have been brought on to life by the human in the name of money as our god.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself take from another what is not mine as I have already have and thus want more then y fair share and so I abuse, kill, and rape in the name of my god as money for the desires I hold to have the most.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse, kill and rape another being in the name of money and having more then what is my fair share as I see myself as more worthy due to the greed of living more luxurious that I presume I deserve.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to kill, abuse, and rape life here in the name of my desires and my wants as I see myself as more worthy then other beings due to who I am and how I have defined myself, and thus created the atrocities that have been brought to humanity over the centuries due to this greed and definition of being more and desiring the best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that to believe that I am more worthy then another being due to my birth place, my ethnicity, my religious affiliation, or any point of definition other then the equal value we all are as life itself, and thus created the annihilation of life as I have separate myself from myself in the greed for more and these definitions I hold as more valuable then other life beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as more worthy then another life being due to my ethnicity, culture, religion, or anything other then who I am as life as all are life as this physical existence we all share.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from life and abuse it because I have defined myself as better and thus I deserve more rather then realizing the way to true freedom and prosperity through honoring another within the true value of who I am as life one and equal with all that exist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse life for the desire for more and kill and annihilate it because I allowed survival to exist instead of realizing we all are here and thus all can LIVE by giving to all what I would want for myself in equality and oneness within all points that exist, this will always equal all in value and give all what is needed to live.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I am here one and equal with all life as I am physical as all are physical and separated myself as a belief that I am more due to a illusional definition of ‘I am better because…” I have created to justify the abuse and killing that I put on others to fulfill my desires as having more when I realize who I am and understand the equality and oneness of all life is fact as I can put myself in the shoes of the other and see this is real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire more then my fair share and justify abuse and killing in the name of my desires, instead of realizing I can have all that is needed in this world by giving it to others and thus this will always be given to self because it was shared among all and there is enough because I created it in such a way using common sense and decency.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to become greedy with what I have and what I want because I believed there wasn’t enough of what is here, realizing that in fact there is enough, I just desired more then my fair share and thus caused the conflict and abuse of others for taking the shares of others instead of giving to all equally as I would want for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deny the life in another and thus glorify the life in myself by giving to myself more then my fair share and thus taking from those who don’t have enough.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to deny the life in myself in equality and oneness which is eternal life and thus squander this opportunity for life in eternal enjoyment because I didn’t not want to give up the god as money for all to have as I would want for myself.

Self Commitment Statements to Follow.

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death, destruction, never forget, 9/11, holocaust, crimes against humanity, war, end of earth, end of life, dysfunction, society, desteni, eqafe, journey to life, iraq, afghanistan, 2012

Day 111 – Hopeless Character

Looking at the personality I go into that, “it is hopeless”, and thus within accepting this point of separation with myself and my physical reality, I diminish my ability to do anything to change the point that at the moment is causing resistance. So thus, I stop this point of going into this resistance of hopelessness when I realize that hope is just another point of self interest because thus it stop the point of direction I could be walking to a stand, and keep me stuck in a point of non self movement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a point of hopelessness with myself because I see that life is too hard and too much, and thus essentially used hopelessness to not have to move myself and find a way to make it work and stabilize myself so thus I can continue with my process of stopping separation with all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the hopeless character as a backdoor within myself to be able to not push myself through the resistances that is faced within many points in my process as I’ve accepted myself to be weak, and thus allowed myself to essentially give up. I realize and see that within allowing back doors I will essentially allow myself to fall when it is convenient as I am not wiling myself enough to push through all resistances that arise which I understand I must do in all cases if I am to be trusted with and as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into hopelessness when I find points in my process that are challenging and thus I face resistance within it as I realize that to walk the change of myself is to go against all the points that I am use to and always been comfortable with so thus it’s an obvious and understood knowing that these challenges will come, thus I realize I must stop the point of hopelessness and use my common sense and self will to push through the challenges and stand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the memory of me within a state of depression and heaviness where in I could not move myself because I had found that no matter what I did, I would always fail in the task I was doing, and within this give up and give in as I found that this point that was not working seemed impossible. I realize that within the task I from the beginning allowed myself to accept the point of hopelessness as I found the task too big and thus judged it as impossible, instead of realizing and walking that anything can be done in small achievable steps and thus instead of looking at the whole picture look within steps that are achievable and thus will accumulate to success.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept memories within myself of giving up and seeing something as hopeless, influence me here where in I must calculate the task at hand within achievable mathematical steps that will accumulate to a achievable outcome, thus I walk here within physical reality to see the context and parts of what I am walking, and thus take each part day by day until eventually it will be done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe a task that I am doing is impossible because it is too big, when I realize and understand to achieve any point within what is in front of me in terms of using common sense assessment and self will in manageable steps that will eventually accumulate my success.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to form a heaviness within my physical body when I go into this point of hopelessness and where it seems that everything is falling apart and I will never be able to get out of what I am trying to do thus I realize to stop this is to don’t accept the heaviness and when I see that I am going into this heaviness, push through it by stopping all thoughts and desires to give up to hopelessness and find small ways to help walk the process that must be walked to complete the tasks I have in front of me that are my responsibilities.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into fear and thus fuel the hopeless character where in I go into the illusion of fear, as in that all will be in upheaval and there is no way I will be able to do what I have set out for me to do because I can’t walk through fear it’s too much, and I am too small to be able to walk through something so powerful. Realizing and seeing that fear is part of my illusion of the mind where in I make it powerful by believing that it has more power then me, but I see that all it takes is to stand up to the fear and walk through it unconditionally, allowing myself to see and know that there is no purpose to fear as it is not reality and does not determine who I can be if I will myself to be it in each moment, I decide.

I commit myself to stop all thoughts, ideas, and pictures that come up within the mind of it’s too much and it’s too hard, and thus push through all points that are resistances and essentially seem like it’s hopeless to walk through and achieve.

I commit myself to let go of this hopeless character where in I face resistances and task that are ‘big’ in scale and thus use my breath as stability to walk through the points in common sense and achievable goals working towards the end result.

I commit myself to stop all backdoors with the hopeless character of giving up on my self and thus using this character to do so with, and push through all resistance that come up as this is life and this is what must be done, to stand up no matter what is here.

I commit myself to let go of all memories that come up in relation to the hopelessness character where in I walk through the memory through writing and find the points that are still causing me to fall, and walk through them in living application to not be directed by the mind as memories.

I commit myself to walk all resistances within a step by step breath by breath accumulation effect where in I take on small achievable points and walk the process within parts instead of taking on the whole, and thus giving myself the back door to fall, as obviously that is not going to be possible to do something in one go, so point by point is what I walk and stop the point of too muchness to give into hopelessness and fall in my process, which is not necessary.

I commit myself to stop all points within the physical mind as heaviness for instance in my body when the hopelessness character is activated, thus I breath and push through, and walk the physical resistance to train myself to stop the mind and walk within the physical here in reality in physical movement and action.

I commit myself to stop the fears that are generated within the hopeless character, and thus push through the fears that arise, and focus on the physical, what can I do to help support myself and the situation I am walking and use common sense to get to solutions. 

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hopeless, i am hopeless, i feel so bad, too much, huge undertaking, tasks, difficulty, hard, character, act, fear, desteni, equal life, 2012, eqafe, journey to life