Here I am looking at this desire within this self judgment persona I have lived out for many years in my life and walking it out to transcend, I see within this I believed that I deserved this self torture I was giving to myself with the beliefs and ideas that I had something wrong with me, that I was dumb and was barely useful in anything, and that it didn’t matter if I live or was gone, I was useless and not worthy, so it was really a point of self hate. I didn’t like myself within the life I had and the body I had, and thus because of this point of hate towards myself, I allowed myself to abuse and harm my physical body through mental torture and fear. I desired a specific outcome, a specific way of life, a specific look, and thus when I was not able to achieve these things, I created the opposite, a point of suffering because I didn’t match up to my ideal and thus I was not going to live the life I wanted, and it’s my fault, it’s my bodies fault for being flawed, and this I didn’t care what happen.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to program within myself that I deserve to suffer due to the belief that I am ‘flawed’ and cannot be fixed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to suffer because I was angry at the fact that I was ‘flawed’ and within this anger want to destroy that part that was causing this anger and pain in my life.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my physical body that which allows me life for the thoughts in my head that I am flawed and thus I deserve to suffer because I am not the idea in my head as a perfect body.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my physical body because of how others treated me and thus instead of seeing the comments of others as a point of insecurity on the other, I blamed my body as the reason of these comments and saw it as the problem.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to only care about my own self interest and miss the others in my world in the harm and abuse I caused as conflict and spite due to existing in jealousy and comparison, and thus abusing others due to my desires for getting what I want and take my anger out on them because I didn’t.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become so blinded within my desire to be happy and thus created the absolute point of polarity as misery within my world because I could not get my self interest and thus blamed that which I could everyone else and everything else to not have to face the creator of this suffering and that would be me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create suffering within myself and my physical body, and desire myself to suffer because I believed I could get what I wanted in self interest.
For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Artwork By Fellow Destonian:
Rozelle de Lange
Check Him out here: