Day 49- Giving My Power Away

I just twisted my knee rather abruptly just now while I was blow drying my hair in the mirror, which I never do. I blew dry it because I made a judgment of myself that my hair was crazy looking as it was air dried and thus was wild looking. I have to still do my vlog for tonight, so I went into the point of 'I have to blow dry my hair and make it tame or else what will people think of me if I go on with wild hair. Within this thought and thus living out the judgment within me going in and blow drying my hair is the separation I have been existing as and thus my knee had to twist for me to realize what in fact I was doing, giving my power away to a thought about who I am and how I will be perceived based on my self judgment that I will not look good enough for others. Thus I am giving my power away to my mind, so I am not able to stand here, which was indicated through the weak knee and thus I must walk the self forgiveness on giving my power away to a thought of 'I need to change who I am because I am not enough to be acceptable for others'.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away as equal and one to life as the directive principle to the thought that 'I need to change who I am because I am not enough to be acceptable for others', within this giving my self to my mind to direct me as I lived out the action of going and blowing my hair straight to thus look acceptable in my minds eye.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to live into the pattern that I need to impress others by living into the judgment that I must look presentable when in front of others because I fear being judged and thus not being liked.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away to the fear of being judged by others and not liked based on my projection that I will be ugly and unable to be looked at because others will be repulsed by the way I look.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to actually live and exist within the self judgment that I repulse people based on the way I look and thus I desire all the time to make sure that I am perfected within my look and thus go out of my way to be seen as acceptable for my self, so I will be stable enough to be in front of others because if I accept my picture then others will.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to live out this point of weakness within myself based on defining myself by the way I look because I see that to be seen as ugly is to be weak and thus I will always go into a point of weakness when I have defined myself by this picture of ugliness I hold in my head and become inferior in that moment with others and thus lose my power within self willed action to the mind and lose my power to walk the correction as I have separated myself from myself by judging myself as less then.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to judge myself as less then because of the way I look and thus go the extra step to correct this point so I can be acceptable for others as I project they I will be dismissed and rejected if I am not perfect within my picture.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to project my own fears and self judgments onto others and thus walk into situation with others in competition and comparison as my starting point to define who I am within the situation as I am only exist within the mind as a picture missing myself here as life equal and one with all thus losing my power to live one and equal with all as I have given my power away to competition and comparison due to fear and self judgment.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to have this idea in place that I have to look a certain way to be accepted and liked by others based on my own self judgment and comparison with others where I judge and like/dislike others based on my initial reaction to their picture.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to exist within and as self judgment and comparison with life here where I diminish them within myself where I am really only diminishing myself by giving my power away to the mind and thus losing my ability to exist as life as who I really am one and equal with the other but in diminishment as attack and abuse to be seen as more and thus to be the winner.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away to ego as desire to be the winner and thus allow and accept competition within myself as all life here and only cause the diminishment as myself because I realize I am competing against me, I am attack myself based on the delusion as an idea that I have to be better and be the winner.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to define myself and allow a reaction to a being based on an idea of perfection I am having of that being in my head and thus reject them if they don't suit my desire.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hold a desire as an idea of perfection that I am using as a definer of life within if I will live with or reject accepting and allowing myself completely to separate myself form others and my own self power by not seeing life for who we are and causing abuse to others as well as myself because I desire to be perfect and to win.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hold onto the idea that i have to win to survive and thus got addicted to this winning based on the good feelings thus I abused life to feel good because i am addicted to energy and thus only existed within getting this energy as good feelings because I separated myself from myself as life thus lost the power of what it mean to live self perfected with all as self one and equal as this physical existence in harmony.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hold onto this idea of perfection within my head that I must look perfect for others to like me or I will not gain the attention I desire and not be given the praise and good feelings as energies I am addicted to from others within how I have manipulated the relationships to be seen that I am more then who I think I am as I don't think very highly of myself based on seeing myself less then this perfection idea I hold onto.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to desire attention from others as praise and good feelings because I am not giving this to my self as I am hard on myself where I see myself never good enough, never pretty enough, never smart enough, never satisfied with what I am and who I am so thus in a constant point of self sabotage because I have separated myself into an idea of perfection that can never be fulfilled because the energy I am desiring and looking for runs out and continually has to be generated and re generated which takes much effort.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away to the thought that 'I am not good enough' based on this idea that I have to be perfect in everything I do because I am only defining myself by how others respond to me never accepting and allowing myself and my own self assessment in self honest as self criticism or self love but done within the mind as a point of absolute perfection where I need to be the best at all times or I am nothing and thus the only way that I see myself as the best is if others see this of me as well.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to only exist within the point as a projection of myself onto others as an idea or facade I am existing as as a perfect picture and that what I do is always going to be top notch, and thus judging myself as not worthy when my world does not respond in this way as I can not be top notch within what I am doing as this is impossible and to live for others judgments of me to define how I am is always going to end up in self sabotage as I never will be satisfied with myself I will never know and live who I really am because I am always in a constant state of self separation as self judgement trying to live for others because I am living as separation for good feelings by how others treat me based in this idea that for them to give me what i need as self praise I have to look perfect thus creating a constant state of instability and misery because I am never satisfied.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to abdicate my responsibility to myself to live self empowerment through facing myself and stopping these patterns of self sabotage by stopping existing within these ideas of self perfection, and live within and as the moment as self living in self perfection. Walking myself within and as the process of who I realize I am as life one and equal to stop the separation and walk here in breath through giving myself care and love by living and accepting myself as who I am and stopping the addiction to energy through others and becoming humble within and as myself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear facing myself because I fear facing my past.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear facing the past as their is a lot of points I can not see and do not know how to deal with in this moment, but realize to walk the points as they come is what will assist me to get through it and walk the points within self honesty and stopping fear and self judgement.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow fear to direct me.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away based on a picture and an idea that is not real and thus is not what define me as it's made up in my mind and thus I have the power to stop it and walk what I realize is self stability and self support here as my breath in each moment breath by breath and walk fearless in what is to come as I realize I have created what is here and thus I will do what it takes to walk myself to equalize myself with my creation and correct what I have lived faulty.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away to the mind missing me here as breath as life.

When and as this point comes to judge myself based on thoughts, ideas, and self judgment due to the desire to please others through this idea that I have to look and be perfect for others approval thus I live this out in seperation to myself by giving my power away to the mind in desires and self interest missing life here within and as me as one and equal to all. I stop, breath, and walk the correction by stopping all participation in the mind as thoughts, desires, ideas, and stop separating myself with others by stop looking for acceptance and accept myself. Through breath I stabilize myself and continue to stop all the points I see were I am separating myself and not here within and as what I am doing. I give my power back to me by walking the physical breath by breath and walking equal and one with my physical reality as the physical body. I push myself to stop my mind and walk here as the physical and give myself my power back by accepting myself in who I am in all aspects and walking the correction that is here to be walked, stopping separating myself into energy attainment through the mind which is not who I am.

I commit to walk myself out of the mind by stopping self judgment, ideas, competition, thoughts, and the quest to gain acceptance from others and walk the acceptance of myself within common sense and humbleness.

I commit myself to stop comparing myself and living within an idea of the mind but live here within the physical body by stabilizing myself with breath and physical action.

I commit to walk as equal and one with all I come into contact with and stop my mind from direct me into self sabotage by letting the thoughts, ideas, pictures go, and continue to stay stable and walk with one and equal.



giving my power away I am powerful, am I powerful?, what is life, are we powerful beings, self power, getting my power back, equality, oneness, eqafe, journey to life, desteni, 2012