Day 156 – What is in a Name? Part 2 – ‘Garb’ age

Now my name is Garbrielle, and within my friends and what name stuck was this name of Garb, I didn't ever really consider this name being anything then just a nickname until it was used in a not so pleasant way. When I first heard my nickname used in a diminishing way or what I found to be diminishing way is when I was called ‘Garbage’ as obviously garbage is rotten, old foul leftovers of human waste, and thus is generally resisted and frowned upon due to the unpleasant smells and appearance of what this look like. So I did not take to kindly in hearing others call me this name, either in a friendly joking way or in a way to diminish me. So everytime I hear the word garbage I recluse into myself as I know that within this point I am vulnerable to attack and abuse, and being attacked and abused was not a point I desired due to me wanting the ‘good’ life of basic self interest.

But within this, is this who I am and how I define myself, someone defined by a word and thus only thinking about myself and my own happineness in life. For a long time, yes, this was me, but this never brought me any form of happiness or satisfaction within a wholeness of myself, but constant inner conflict and swayed by the tides of others. I have learned throughout the years thought that this way of living I don’t want to continue living in this way. I realize that within the word ‘garbage’ I hold a negative charge as I described above and thus within being called this reacted in negativity towards myself and thus created an instability within me based on this judgment. But within the word garbage it is just a word, there is no chain coming out of the word latching me by my feet and enslaving me to it, I am the one doing it to myself by allowing this word to have power over me by judging the word as negative.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge the word garbage within a picture in my head as gross rotting waste and thus within this point take it personally when another called me this because my name has the likes of this word within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to charge this word as negative and thus define myself in a negative way as a worthless person based on others calling me this because of the deliberate nature of the word to be seen as something that is not wanted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to thus define myself by being called this name in a way that created an inner conflict based on seeing that people where calling me this on purpose because I am this way worthless and unwanted, but not considering the point of it being a joke or just done in a similarity type of way not personally, and thus just see the dark and negative connotations to the word and the correlation of me within this as being this word as the idea I have placed on it as worthless and unwanted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define the word garbage as a disgrace and an attack and thus within this saw myself less then others and so went into self diminishment based on defining myself by the idea I had placed on the word ‘garbage’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take being called garbage as a personal attack and thus go into a reclusion within myself towards the other in a giving up way to show that I have defined myself by this word as negative and thus see myself as less then that who called me in such a way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a give up character when I am called garbage as if I am defined and determined by my idea of this word as worthless and unwanted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself in my world as worthless and unwanted and thus take this word as garbage personally as I am already defining myself in such a way and thus further manipulating myself into self sabotage by using this word to define me as what I think about myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself based on holding onto the idea of a word as being who I am based on being called it in a way that I deemed demeaning, and thus live into this as self suppression.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself by how others treated me and thus go into self suppression within my physical interaction with others in a suppression and tightness within the body when this word is spoken.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow my physical to restrict based on defining myself by this word as garbage, I realize that the word is a word and it doesn’t define me as it simple describing a point of physical processing and has no relevance to me or my name.

Will continue in the next blog.


Artwork By Fellow Destonian:
Damian Ledesma -

Check Him out here:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/damianldsm?fref=ts
Blog: http://damianspanish.wordpress.com/


best names, birth, bullies, bullying, desteni, eqafe, equality, name, naming, parents, say my name, self forgiveness, garbage, being picked on, name called,

Day 155- What's in a name? Part 1 – Self Commitment Statements

I suggest if you are interested in walking the self forgiveness, reference Day 154: What is in a name? Part 1 - Self Forgiveness blog. 

I commit myself to when I hear my name being said not correctly and I find the backchat becomes activated within me, I stop and breath, and state ‘no, I don’t accept myself to go into this backchat’ and not participate. I walk the correction after stabilizing myself to tell them my correct name if it’s relevant and move on.

I commit myself to walk the correction of stopping existing in memories of seeing myself superior to others and seeing them as annoyances because I had to stop and correct them with my name, so thus stop the point of annoyance as I realize this is just showing that I am in self interest and not considering the other as myself, so consider the other as me and treat them as equals.

I commit myself to stop the point of desire to get a high feeling and thus I commit myself to stop desire for energy as feelings.

I commit myself to stop the point of superiority and thus stop the thoughts as seeing others as stupid and assuming that they are not hearing me deliberately in spitefulness because I was accepting impatience and not breathing, so thus I correct this by considering that others might not have heard it correctly or simply couldn’t say it properly, stopping assumption and impatiences, and thus I breath, and say to them my name correctly without any energy movement.

I commit myself to stop judging others in anyway and understand from a perspective of give as I would like to receive, to treat others as equal as no one is more then any other being thus i correct myself by living this through stopping the thoughts and emotions as impatience in superiority to others.

I commit myself to stop the point of justification within me based on accepting this point of superiority that they should know and listen more carefully to my name and they won't mess it up, so stopping the point of taking it personally and going into blame, and thus take responsibility for who I am by stopping the reactions when my name is mis-spoke through breathing and walking the physical correction of speaking my name again with no inner movement.

I commit myself to stop the point of blame as it being their fault and simply if my name is not said right, breath, and tell them the correction if it is relevant stopping any movements within me to go into blame.

I commit myself to breath when resistances come up to work or speak with others when I find someone continuing to speak my name incorrectly, and continue to interact when I am stable to stop this point of separation as it’s simply energy and thus I realize it will run out, so walk until I am clear and can speak in equilibrium with all to continue to correct my name or let it be as it is irrelevant.

Artwork By Fellow Destonian:
Marlen Vargas Del Razo -

Check Her out here:

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/marlen.delrazo
Youtube:
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http://www.youtube.com/user/MarlenVargasDelRazo
Blogs: http://marlenvargasdelrazo.wordpress.com/

Day 154- What is in a name? Part 1 - Self Forgiveness

Here looking at the existence within my name, my name I was given at birth was Garbrielle, but when anyone first meets me and a few times after that they miss the first r and say Gabrielle. So I began to grow a resistance to my name and saying my name to others, because I know I was going to have to repeat myself and correct them, and they still were not going to get it right. I find that within this of meeting new people and finding that I was going to have to say my name again, and this ended up happening, I would say within myself ‘Can’t you just hear what I am saying to you, it’s not Gabrielle, it’s Garbrielle!” And react in annoyance based on this idea that people should know how to say my name. But realizing that the way my name is spelled is not easy to here the r so it’s to stop the reaction of others saying my name wrong and correct it if it’s relevant.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed backchat thoughts of ‘why can’t people say my name right’ when I hear another person say my name without the r in it as I have imprinted within me from memory moments where I would have to correct my name spelling more times then not, and thus allowed the emotion of annoyance to direct me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live from memories of me within separation of others where I would create this superiority to them, where I was too busy to stop and say my name to them again correctly, so I could continue on my search to find a positive experience and thus treat the people in my world as a nuisance because I wasn’t getting that high as feeling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the point of believing myself to be superior to others based on not getting the result I wanted and thus seeing them as stupid and not listening, where I had to inconvenience my life to tell them the correct spelling of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others as stupid and not listening to me based on me being impatient and believing my time and activities are more important then others, and so act annoyed with them based on this belief of myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see that within this belief that I am more important then others I am deliberately allowing spitefulness and nastiness towards others based on this imposed position I have created for myself with those who in this case, say my name wrong and then use this as a justification to be spiteful and nasty to them because I was put out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed justification within my world of being more important then others and thus react within points of someone not understanding what I am saying or seeing something differently then what I intended, in spitefulness and annoyance and thus be quick and unfriendly with them based on this point of separation I am accepting within me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see those that say my name incorrectly within a point of superiority and thus justify my acts within this separation, and treat others less then who I believe myself to be as more important and that they are burdening me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into superiority with others that don’t say my name right and thus immediately go into irritation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in irritation when my name is spoken wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto this belief that I am more important then others and thus they are holding me back with not hearing my name and how to say it properly and making me repeat myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to my name being said wrong in a resistance and thus blame the person who said my name wrong as the cause of this resistance I am feeling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to thus allow blame onto another person for the emotions as resistance and irritation I am accepting within myself based on judging someone and holding onto judgment of someone for saying my name wrong.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge another person in any way what so ever.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame others for my own reactions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto resistances towards others for points that I am accepting and thus causing the resistance to occur.

More to follow in next blog.

Day 153- Good Person Character – Self Corrective Statements

I commit myself to when I see the thought of ‘I am not being accepted by others’, I stop and breath, and realize that when I don’t allow this thought to direct me, I am not creating things out of thin air, instead I walk the physical dimension and continue to interact with the physical world not allowing this thought to direct me. When I find I go into the point of reclusion and tightness of the stomach, I realize I have accepted the thought and thus have to become more diligent in my application of stopping allowing the thoughts to influence me, and remain here as the breath.

I commit myself to stop the point of self victimization within this point of accepting the thought that I am being rejected, and thus stop the point of polarity that I am not as good as the other because they are rejecting me, realizing that these are all mind illusions and self sabotage manipulation to stay within this point of self diminishment. SO thus I stop the point of seeing others in a polarity and see others as physical beings one and equal to me, and walk the application of correction of stopping the separation with others and physical walking the equality of us through living it.

I commit myself to stop the point of comparison with another in so I can stop the point of polarity as by stopping participating in the thought of ‘I am being rejected’ and so walk the approach of having no expectation with others and being comfortable with self, so thus I will not have any motivation with others, but to hang out in equality and be with the person in comfortablity.

I commit myself to stop judging others movements and mannerism within who they are with me and thus be here as myself in whatever happens, practice the point of being here as what is here in full acceptance, and thus directing the point in practical solutions that make sense, stopping the mind dimensions of judgment and self sabotage.

I commit myself to stop assuming how others are thinking, and thus be here no matter what the point is within the other, so thus I am stable and able to support others in stability and clarity, ending the point of dependency on their reactions towards me.

I commit myself to stop the point of self sabotage through not allowing the good person character to become me through this point of not accepting myself and assuming that others are rejecting me, and thus be real here and not be dependent on personality to determine who I will be, but be able to be here in stability as self in my own skin.

I commit myself to stop the point of using characters to be seen as nice/good/liked, and thus walk the point of being real and thus birthing my own self expression in who I really am.

I commit myself to stop the manipulating others through fake faces, and become real here so we as life can be real here and stop existing within the mind as separate faces for separate occasions, be here stable as one face as our real face as equal with the face and body of equality, which is the physical.

I commit myself to walk who I am as real as changing myself in the physical, so thus I stop the point of using fake faces to make it easier for myself, and thus face all of who I am and start to walk the change to equality here in myself. 

Art By: Scott Cook

Check him out here:

https://www.facebook.com/scott.cook.56

http://scottalancook.blogspot.com/

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Day 152- “Good Person” Character – Physical Reactions – Self Forgiveness

Here looking at the physical reactions I experience that activate the ‘good person’ character, and so where I will submit to and thus accept myself to align with a certain specific way of being instead of here breathing as myself.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I am being seen within my mind as not accepted by others in my reality through a thought such as ‘I am being seen as unapproachable based on the way that person addressed me being cold’ I will physically react within my body as a tightness in my stomach and thus recluse myself, and from there in our interactions will see this person as the dominant one.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when my body reacts within a tightness due to an assumed rejection from another as being cold, I will then see this person as more dominant then me and thus fall into a submissive role with them in interactions.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a reaction of tightness within my stomach when I have assumed that another has rejected me due to how one approached me as not acceptable in my eyes and thus I follow the thought that ‘I am being seen as unapproachable based on the way that person addressed me as being cold’ and thus activate a polarity of comparison as than go into being inferior based on the assumption that I am not being accepted by this person.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to another based on how I perceived the other within how they approached me as cold, and thus immediately went into the inferior stance as seeing myself as being rejected and thus less then.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as being rejected by another based on an assumption of their physical body movement and approach in a moment towards me as being cold when in fact I didn't know why they moved in such a way.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to thus through this assumption of being rejected and then the reaction of physical tightness in my body as a suppression, immediately go into the activation of the ‘good person’ character as this is the approach I will have on those that I see are not accepting me right away to thus win their acceptance as being good and/or likable.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the ‘good person’ character when I find that I am not being accepted and use this character to have more of a chance of being accepted and seen as likable.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manipulate others within this character of being a ‘good person’ so I can be accepted as within myself I have not accepted myself and thus will use this point to gain good feelings if I win the other over with this character activation as the ‘good person’ I will feel better about myself.




I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compete with others to make myself feel better when I win in this exchange and thus be subject and enslaved to this point of how others will see me and react to me being a person I am not such as this ‘good person’ character.




Self Commitment Statements to follow.



Art Above by: Matti Freeman


Check him out here;




http://matterfreeman.com/


https://www.facebook.com/MattiFreeman







For Further Support, Please check out Links:

Journey to Life Group

Creation's Journey to Life

Earth's Journey to Life

Heaven's Journey to LIfe

Eqafe Life Products - Self Help

Desteni Site

Desteni Wiki







change the world, character, desteni, eqafe, equal money, I am a good person, illusion, lie, mind, not real, personality, phyiscal reality, process, self forgiveness, fear, being liked, needing attention, special backchat, physical reaction

Day 150 – ‘I am a good person’ Fear Dimension

What I fear when becoming this character as the good person character is that I will not be liked and thus move into this character for others to have reason to like me, this not being genuine because it’s done out of fear of being alone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the good person character to have others see me as an easy going nice person, so I can be liked.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being seen as a good person as I within this will have to face who I am as my backchat and the points that I have kept hidden and secret because I don’t want others as well as myself to really see and understand who I am within it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing the hidden points within me because I see these as difficult points and I desire to have an easy and enjoyable time, and within manipulating others with the good person character, I will be much more likely to experience this.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing the hidden part of myself and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use a false front as the good person character to not have to do what is necessary to be done which is face the shit within me and deal with it, and change to support all life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the good person character to have people like me but within this not know who I am in stability because I am basing myself on others and thus will be moved by others reactions towards me.

I forgive my that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire others to like me so I always have a stable point to be at and be entertained with so thus using the good person character to win friends and be entertained, but within this I loss my self stability as I am compromising myself for my mind as good feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be unconditional within who I am with others and have a secret agenda to just fit in so I don’t have to feel negative feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have agendas when being with other to have them like me and so use the good person character to get them to like me and thus then I won’t have to feel bad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear negative feelings and thus become addicted to the good feelings within the mind as is generated when my good person character is accepted and liked.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself with the good person character in being in self interest to have my own desires met of feeling good and being entertained, while the world is going to hell and many are suffering, this is created based on the mind I am participating in through the feelings I am creating as real and living into them as if this is who I am, based in my own self happiness while others are suffering.

I commit myself to stop participating in the good character persona for others acceptance and approval so I can be able to walk as a point of stability here in real reality.

I commit myself to stop the fear of being alone and face what is here in whatever point is here, it is not relevant whether I am alone or not as I am never alone as there is countless beings always here, so I stop this point of seeing myself alone and embrace others as myself.

I commit myself to let go of the desire to be entertained with good feelings by letting go of this fake persona, as being a good person, and be real here and direct myself so I can be trusted with others and with myself as I am walking what I am talking.

I commit myself to stop self interest in wanting to be liked and seen as special by others by letting go of the desire to get attention and be more then others, through breathing, stopping the thoughts, and stopping each time the participation in these energy movements arise within.

I commit myself to push the point of being unconditional with myself and with others and stop the self judgment of myself so I can be here for real and accept what is here as it is, changing all points that don’t support life through and as myself first.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

change the world, character, desteni, eqafe, equal money, I am a good person, illusion, lie, mind, not real, personality, phyiscal reality, process, self forgiveness, fear, being liked, needing attention, special

Day 149- ‘I am a good person’ Character Self forgiveness - Intro

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in the thought that I am a good person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be a good person so I will not get in trouble from elders and thus be seen in a good way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen as a good person to have others like me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen as a person that will always do the right thing so in others mind I will be seen as someone who can be relied on and will be in good standings with them in the future, having them as my ally.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen as a good person but in my thoughts have backchat about others and dishonorable thoughts.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the good person persona as a way to manipulate others to do things for me, instead of standing equal to others and supporting, as I would like to be supported.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen by others as good because I desire to have friends and be seen by others as someone who is nice and easy to be around.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to liked and seen as a nice and easy going person and so use the good person pesona to have others see me in the positive side as a good, nice and easy going person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself to have people like me and see me as nice by playing into this fake persona as the nice and good person, while within myself I allow backchat of judgments of the other beings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise myself and be deceptive towards others due to my desire to be liked and seen as acceptable by others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be like and accepted by others because I see myself as only acceptable if others see me as this and accept me, and so will change myself to thus fit into this point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to change myself based on trying to fit in and be liked by others, and thus living in separation from my own self direction and understanding.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from myself due to desire.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed desire to direct me.

I commit myself to stop this persona as the ‘good person’ personality, and walk the who I am here as my living direction through my self-application and understanding to stand equal with others.

I commit myself to breath through the desire to go into the good character to want to be liked and thus continue to walk my own self-acceptance, by speaking the point within myself and stopping the compromise for others.

I commit myself to stop all points of backchat and investigate and self forgive the points so thus I am not compromised due to my own acceptance but am clear and here with others as equals.

I commit myself to stop the desire to be seen as someone other then who I am and