“Here looking at how I go into my mind and express my anger towards another when within my living I had perceived that someone has offended me”
Please reference these blogs for further context:
Day 253 – Yelling/Beating Someone Up in My Mind
Day 254 - "Being Taken Advantage of" to Justify My Abuse
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and thus understand that when I take another’s actions towards me personal, as a personal attack or a deliberate action of offense towards me, I will simultaneously activate and trigger the anger emotional energy within me of desiring revenge against this person and further causing abusive consequences to others and myself because within my mind I assumed that the perception of how I took reality is the way in reality it really was, when this is not possible to definitively know because I am not considering reality for real, but just my mind in my own self interest to be right or get something out of whatever situation I am taking offense from.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that when I take offense of another’s actions or words towards me immediately I go into this anger emotion and then my view is distorted laced with intense emotions that overcome me and I will usually become irrational and just seek to create a release onto that which created this intense emotion within me or rather that trigger this emotional outburst within me as energy.
And thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take these energy emotional reactions that I have created within me back to myself as the creator of this in the first place, and see where and how I went into this reaction and why, and realign these points in the physical reality to reassess if this is truly what is real and what is best for all. Obviously, I realize reacting in anger towards another is not best for all as this cause further abuse to myself as the other, and only conflict is created because I am not considering the other as an equal, but separating me from the other as the wronged and me the righteous.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as righteous whenever I react to another and thus define my actions as justified and the other as inconsiderate when to me, when in reality I made no effort to communicate this and find out the why this person did what they did towards me that triggered this emotional reaction, and thus for me to take it back to myself and see where and why I am still reacting as reaction in anger shows that I am not taking responsibility for my actions and my behavior in finding considering the other as myself and finding what is the origin of the actions taken that were not something that I appreciated.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to the release of the anger emotion and really enjoy this play out of reacting and releasing my anger and vengeance onto another based on the superior feelings I get over the other in making me feel strong and more powerful and the other seen as small and weak.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand my effects on others when I allow anger to direct me and control me to outburst on others as an immediate restriction and resistance from me, and the process it will take to get back to a stable point within the relationship and communication to again have the opportunity for clarity and change to occur so the solution is reached in a point of equalagreement and understanding of the situations that occurred that created the conflict point in the first place.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take others actions towards me personal and use anger to seek my revenge on them because I felt weak and inferior to them in that moment, and believed they were doing this deliberately to make me look stupid and small.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to then seek revenge and fuel this revenge on the other with anger emotion because I blamed the other for this anger I was feeling that I created within me due to feelings of inadequacy they activated of them offending me due to me feeling less then them and them deliberately making me feel less when it was me holding onto memories of being felt less then others when I took what others did to me personal as well such as close the door on me without considering that I also need to come through the door to get into the building.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to access anger emotion due to this feeling of inadequacy within myself of feeling left out and that others don’t like me and reject me and thus they deliberately didn’t leave the door open for me because they think of me this way as not worthy and wanted me to look like a fool.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to assume that the other who did not hold the door open for me did this on purpose because within my mind I immediately had a memory of others in school closing the door on me because I was seen as not cool and thus the others wanted to be mean and make me feel left out.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to this person in anger and blame because I allowed a memory of rejection I took personally direct me in this moment, and thus go into an anger reaction towards them immediately without seeing, understand, or communicating with the other to understand the facts of what really happen and sort out the point to stop the point of blame and emotion.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another for memories that are occurring within me and thus I am allowing to direct me into the physical as a point of seeing the other to blame.
For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help