The Decision – Day 330

Within this process being walked of self honesty to correct one’s living to become equal and one with all life, one will face decisions, and at a certain point an absolute decision to either stand as and for life here in the physical or continue within the mind as a programmed response organic robot. This decision is quite a process to walk because all we have ever been is these programmed robots being automated based on feelings, emotions, thoughts, memories, but we are more then just these automated responses. I have found when looking at this decision, to live or stay a robot, the choice is clear because obviously I want to be life and live, the problem being is that I not only have to make the decision to live, but I have to actually do it as well, I have to live, I have to be life for real, and life is here living simplistically in the physical with no mind, no thoughts, no feelings, no emotions, the trees are a living example of life, so it’s like to be like a tree so to speak, here, breathing, living, and supporting in equality. So this process that has to be walked, making the decision not only here now, but in each breath to come and to stick to reality, live what is best, live from practical common sense, and stop the mind from directing oneself into compromise is some of the components to get this done.  

I am seeing what is helping with my decision as I have started to dedicate myself to this point is to slow down within what I am doing, I am practicing being in my movements, in my physical body, feeling my feet on the ground, my fingers typing each letter on the keyboard, and staying focused on what is real, my physical body as much as possible. The mind always wants to creep in and take over, but as I have been practicing this technique I am seeing that I am becoming more aware of the mind and me as the mind movements. I have not gotten to the point where I am able to remain stable here within the body for long periods of time, staying within the movements each moment or each breath, but it is becoming more and more stable as I practice.

Also, another point I am finding supportive within making this decision to live and stop my mind, which was described in detail tonight with the Metaphysical Secrets of imagination – part 25 I had the opportunity to sit in on live, is that to be here one have to let go of the past moment, not bring these past happenings or expectations to the moment here and allow them to influence this new moment that is now happening because this separates you from the reality that is here and puts you into your mind where you will start the creation process of illusion through memories and thoughts, and these will accumulate to make it more difficult to be here in your physical body until they are cleared with self forgiveness and self change. So it’s a process to walk as been said before, but through consistent application and will it can be done. Space and time will tell of course, so I must not waste these breaths I am given to make sure I live the best I am able to and walk what has to be walked to ensure life is brought back to natural order where all are equal and one starting within my very internal world.

So the decision is a foundational stability point I have found based on realizing that there is only the option of equality and oneness of life and stopping the mind as ourselves in abuse and so this grounds me into an understanding of what I am doing, how I can move forward, and gives me a starting point to always work from and sustain myself as. And so I can bring it back to the physical in common sense living when I see I get lost into my mind for a moment, and realize instantly ok, the decision, I am walking to life, to the physical, to me here equal and one with what is real. I can always bring the decision here when getting overwhelmed with points coming up within the mind or feel low or in a mind state, to ‘remember’ who I am and what I am doing here. I realize I am the decision, my life will be proof of who I am as the decision and what I have made of this life I was gifted. I realize within my beingness what I am to do, how I am to be, and the gift that awaits all who walk this decision to be life and restore equality and oneness to who we are as life in all ways until it is done is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and to all others.


Recommended Links to Check Out:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki
Basic Income Guarantee
Equal Money System Website
Equal Life Foundation

Photo Source

Day 192 – ‘Taking Things Personal’ Personality– Fear Dimension – No Conflict!

Here continuing to look at the taking things personal personality within the dimension of fear, and how this personality was energized and sustained through this fear of being in conflict that I had when I was confronted about being late. I found when I was confronted, I went into a fear of having to confront her because I was in the ‘wrong’ and knew I had no defense, so I went into the thoughts of justifications as I wrote in last blog to take the easy way out and make it about her within myself. This was in my own self interest based on negating the direct conflict and also being the winner in myself because I used the thoughts as ‘she’s is wrong’ and ‘can she just chill’ through seeing me as the victim and so, I created that within myself and thus was rude and brushed her off. Not actually facing her and speaking to her directly in her eyes, and admitting to my inconsideration’s and saying I was sorry, but avoiding her and blaming her for the way I was feeling within myself which was uncomfortable.

So the fear of not having to face her and get into a conflict drove me into having this belief that I have to defend myself and based on the belief that I have to defend myself because of this idea that conflict will make me vulnerable to attack, I suppressed myself in not saying anything much to her and calling her out in my head in blame for making this fear activate of conflict and thus blaming her for making me feel vulnerable, and this was lived physical in my behavior when I didn’t turn to say good bye to her when she said bye to us. Spitefulness and blame go hand and hand within not taking responsibility and being completely possessed within my own thoughts and emotions of blame towards her for this fear emotion I was feeling of being exposed and thus open to vulnerability within her confronting me about being late, and so made the whole activity within myself about her, distracting myself from facing myself and taking responsibility for who I was being within that moment of activation of the 'taking it personal' personality.

All of this being activated and walked through within a split second and thus once this was activated, the taking it personal personality, this whole chain event occurred of not taking responsibility for my actions, but using thoughts and fears to protect myself and shut her out of my life, so I could not be hurt by her. Conflict being a huge point within my life and my suppression as well as reactions of abuse and anger towards others has been creating great instability within myself and instability within my world and relationships. I realize that I have created this within and throughout my own mind and thus my own actions, and so I must take responsibility for this and correct it. This so I can stop the abuse of others and become stable within myself to take the correct course of action in supporting others and myself, and doing what is best for all.

More to come in next blog.



For Further Support, Please check out Links:

Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

Day 191 – 'Taking things Personal' Personality – Thought Dimension - “She is Wrong”

So looking at this thought that came up within my last post of when I was confronted by another within being late for work, and found myself immediately taking it personally with the thought that activated and thus generated the personality of ‘taking things personal’ were I went into a defense mode with anger and attacked her within my physical demeanor, so I am grateful that this occurred and her calling me out as I can now see what I am doing within this personality activation, and so I can then correct it and align it with equality and oneness of all life.

So the thought was that “she is wrong” and within myself I went immediately into anger, and wanted to prove her wrong based on taking her calling me out personally and seeing as if it is an attack on who I am. I physically acted this ‘taking it personally’ personality out in that moment within trying to figure out what the actual time was, so I could prove that she was wrong and use the time as evidence that I am right, I went and looked for the right time, and found I was late. I did not stop the energy accumulation though, because then I went then into a point of attack based on seeing myself being attacked, so in my mind I called her ‘a bitch’ ‘why can’t she just chill out’, making me the victim and her the cause of my reactions. I realize obviously that this whole taking it personally personality is a dishonest action within me based on me not wanting to accept the fact that I created abuse towards her by not taking the time into consideration and being on time, and then going into abuse towards her because I didn’t want to take responsibility for this consequence based on believing that I am better then her.

Within this I see I am basing my actions purely on assumption alone, and thus then using the physical to prove my own personality play outs that come within taking this point personally, that I am right and she is treating me unfailrly, so ‘taking it personally’ personality active and I played out two other personalities as the self victimization personality and the self righteousness personality. So interesting activations happening here, using the thoughts as ‘she is wrong’ and ‘she is a bitch and why can’t she just settle down’, taking the responsibility and consequence I have created off myself and placing it on the other, where I don’t have to do any correction and essentially take the easy way out….many points here as misaligned and unacceptable, so will walk this post in the next blogs to come to correct this and align back to life as the physical as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when I was called out within being late and thus took it personally accepted and allowed the thoughts that ‘she is wrong’ direct me into a point of superiority and seeing myself as better and more worthy then the person calling me out because of my belief that I am deserving of breaking the rules because I allow others to do this, realizing that this is only a point of self interest and negating the fact that I am not considering the other person at all based on my own self interest of having this go my way and be easy, and this being inconsiderate to the others effected by my actions and not how I would want to be treated. I see, understand, and realize that the ‘taking it personally’ personality is actually only my own self justification and self interest to not have to consider her and come in on time because I want to go at my own speed and do what I want.

I commit myself to when and as I go into a point of thoughts of how another is at fault with the thought ‘she is wrong’, immediately I stop and breath, and remove myself from the situation physically by excusing myself and going to another room, this until I am stable and not moved by thoughts and stable incommunication with others with no reactions as I realize they are not me and thus make it a point to be on time to all my responsibilities.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see the thoughts as ‘she is wrong’ as a point of justification for myself to be rude and nasty towards her because I allowed this thought to direct me intothinking that I was right, but lying to myself as I realized and knew that I was at fault because I knew that I was late, and thus being dishonest because I wanted to be right and not be in the wrong. I realize and understand that when I allow and accept the justification to be fueled by accepting this thought as real that ‘she is wrong’ without considering all the facts here in the physical and only basing myself on the mind as assumptions, I will be unstable and will not be able to trust myself because I am not being honesty within myself and thus lead to abuse of others as well as compromising my own self integrity.

I commit myself to when and as I allow the justification to activate as the thought of ‘she is wrong’ based only on assumption and fueled by the ‘taking it personally’ personality, I stop and do not go any further into these thoughts and personality activations, breathing myself into a stable point within myself by focusing on my breathing and removing myself from the situation until I am stable and can direct the point in clarity. I also commit to let go of these thoughts when they arise as I realize they are not based in truth, and thus find what is self honest within the moment as the physical time of being late, and face the consequences to thus be able to forgive myself and making the correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the thought of ‘she is a bitch’ and go into seeing myself as right when I was rude towards the worker, and thus cause conflict in the relationship because my ego was bruised. I realize and see that when I go into a point of believing myself to be right and accept the thought of name calling based on the fueling of my emotional reaction within me through the ‘taking it personally’ personality, I will be possessed with this point and go into more abuse and conflict with this person because I am in defense mode seeing myself as the victim and her as the attacker, which is I realize based on my own self interest and energy activations as anger and irritation within the living into the personality of seeing it as a personal attack on who I am.

I commit myself to when and as I go into a point of name calling in my mind towards another person because I took something personally that was said to me and allowing the anger and irritation to activate and direct me into abuse towards the other, I breath and stop the thoughts immediately by breathing and focusing my attention on something physical and moving my physical body such as my hands and fingers, to get out of the energy rush that was activated with this personality. I commit to thus walk the self forgiveness on the point and walk the correction to treat the other as myself, and walk as an equal in physical considerations stopping my mind as personalities from directing me.

More to come in the next posts, thanks.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:

Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

Day 101 - Fear of Abuse - Part 2 - Submission

Artwork By: Matthew Reed - "The Pursuer"

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to submit to fear within a point of trusting feelings of unworthiness where in I believe that I am not in control and thus automatically go into the feeling as diminishment where in I become less then the feeling and allow the fear to direct me to retract into myself and thus suppress my expression in life as I allowed the fear to take over.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to submit to fear and thus allow it to take over and direct me into submission as I accepted a belief that the feeling of being less then and thus unable to move through the fear, I become ‘fearful’ and thus will not stand up.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to trust feelings such as unworthiness as if they are who I am, but I realize that feelings are generated within the mind as they are not here direct as physical reality thus not substantial and thus I understand they are not to be trusted but investigated and let go of so thus I am not influenced by any point other then my own self directive will.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the abuse of others based on this belief that the feeling of unworthiness and less then is who I am and thus based on memories of giving my power away through comparison and self judgment I have accepted and allowed myself to become a submissive being who allows others to push me around based on the belief that I am not as good as them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe this feeling of unworthiness because when I was a child I decided based on being made fun of and named called, and thus didn’t have it in me to fight back and stand up for myself, I accepted myself to be less then and thus submitted to others and allowed others to abuse me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand up in the face of obvious abuse by others because I learned within childhood that it is easier just to take it and suppress the pain then face the person and stand up to them as I feared conflict and thus the abuse that would come of that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make the decision to compare myself with others and thus judge myself as less then those who were not being picked on and named called and thus I defined myself within a polarity play out with the others in a comparison of judgment based on looks as the name calling was based on the way I looked and acted.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the memories of me being picked on and named called and thus go through life within a polarity play out of less then or greater then within the idea that I am more or less then another based on the way we look and thus constantly compare myself with others due to holding onto this memory as a child that I am less then those who don’t get picked on and thus equated the being picked on to my looks thus fearing those who were ‘better’ looking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge those as ‘better’ looking as more then me because I equated them to those who where the abusers based on holding onto this memory of the abusers within a context of pictures, and thus feared those who are ‘better’ looking thus more then me because I believed that to be so and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear those who are ‘better’ looking because I feared being abused by them because I saw myself automatically less then them as I have equated myself through pictures and thus self judged myself based on the pictures I saw instead of realizing who I am as life and that pictures is not real as it is ideas generated in the mind, who we are as physical is equal and thus I realize I am the only one who can stop these ideas and thus walk the physical as life as who I am to stop being directed and controlled by this fear of abuse.

I commit myself to let go of feelings and stop participating in them by using my physical breath as a stability point and living withinequality with all my environment until I am not moved by the feeling of unworthiness any longer.

I commit myself to stop submitting to fear of abuse by others by stopping the feelings directing me and facing the fear when it arises in my environment and thus moving my physical to just live and stop reacting to feelings and emotions.

I commit myself to stop trusting feelings by stopping the belief that I am less then others.

I commit myself to stop the memories through walking a mind construct of the fear of others and the childhood memories of being made fun of and called names. (for more information on Mind Constructs see this link- this is a more specific and detailed process of self  forgiveness and self correction)

I commit myself to walk through all points of comparison and self judgment that arises within and as me and thus walk the self forgiveness and self correction to thus stop them from having power over me and stop the abuse to others based on these separation points I am accepting and allowing.

I commit myself to stop the fear of conflict and abuse and stand up for myself as life and what has to be done within bringing this world to a world that support and cares for all.

I commit myself to stop the point of submission and hiding as a form of easement as I realize this is self diminishment and thus I will stay a slave, thus I walk the resistances to stand up and push myself to face my fear and this world as abuse starting within and as myself as I stop the abuse of myself.

I commit myself to stop the judgment and comparison point based on pictures as I realize this is obvious separation and that I am here as self within and as all as all is life.

I commit myself to stop submitting to fear and take my power back through building self trust by facing my fears and walking self honesty, self forgiveness, and self correction through writing and my living.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:

Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

submitting, submit to abuse, fear reigns, fear overtaking me, i am so afraid, afraid to live, worthless, I am unworthy, lifeless, equality, equal life, desteni, 2012, organic robot, eqafe, journey to life,