Monday, January 20, 2014

The Starting Point of My Day Will Be the Starting Point of My Way – Day 387

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Today I had a listen to the Personality Systems - Journeys into the Afterlife - Part 56 and one of the points they spoke about was waking up in the morning and checking yourself in awareness, finding where it is that your mind will try and direct you either through a positive or a negative energy experience or thoughts. For me this morning, I was feeling stressed when I woke up, I have had work become busy so I am in my mind thinking about everything that is going on there. There is one point that stood out today as I looked back on my day, and I saw that I started my work day off within a point of blame towards another.

I am existing within this blame towards this other and treating him where I am trying to inferiorize him to others very subtly and very passively. This I find it’s been within my quantum physical, where I will shrug my shoulders at something I am asked about this specific being resonating a disgust type attitude towards the situation I am looking at in the moment, and I found this was to ensure I am seen in a way I prefer because I have in my mind thought of myself as more because I have been doing more work. So I am using this point of belief that I am more then this other person due to my physical movement, and so have the starting point of trying to sabotage him so I appear more in the right by others I am around.

There is an experience I am following within these moments that I see I go into this blame behavior towards my environment and in these specific moments in relation to this person, and it’s based on a point of my desire for others to pity me and get recognition for the work I feel I am not being recognized for and so I am basically throwing a quantum physical temper tantrum with my physical actions and physical words in moments of my day that are unacceptable. This because I realize I am not only effecting my life, my existence, my environment, but I am also influencing others life, existence, and environment, and directing others either directly in words or actions or indirectly in subtle movements of the quantum physical, but still there is a message I am sending towards others and it’s in it’s starting point within the desire to abuse and make others become lower then myself, so I am the winner and I am the one that benefits.

But this is not benefiting anyone and this is not winning because I am directing others within who I am in each moment in a way of separation and survival, on an unconscious level agree with this separation and survival mentally and behavior we humans exist in as trying to cut people down to get to the top, and through who I am being this is who I am here. A person that abuses others and only looks out for myself and my interest, this is not the way to oneness and equality in my living, this is not the way to taking care of my neighbor as I would myself, this is not the way to be the who I committed myself to be, so I will support myself and walk the self forgiveness and self correction in relation to my starting point and take responsibility for the living I have created in separation written in this blog to change myself to be best for all. Thanks for reading.

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