The Starting Point of My Day Will Be the Starting Point of My Way – Day 387

Visit more cool art here: Desteni Artists

Today I had a listen to the Personality Systems - Journeys into the Afterlife - Part 56 and one of the points they spoke about was waking up in the morning and checking yourself in awareness, finding where it is that your mind will try and direct you either through a positive or a negative energy experience or thoughts. For me this morning, I was feeling stressed when I woke up, I have had work become busy so I am in my mind thinking about everything that is going on there. There is one point that stood out today as I looked back on my day, and I saw that I started my work day off within a point of blame towards another.

I am existing within this blame towards this other and treating him where I am trying to inferiorize him to others very subtly and very passively. This I find it’s been within my quantum physical, where I will shrug my shoulders at something I am asked about this specific being resonating a disgust type attitude towards the situation I am looking at in the moment, and I found this was to ensure I am seen in a way I prefer because I have in my mind thought of myself as more because I have been doing more work. So I am using this point of belief that I am more then this other person due to my physical movement, and so have the starting point of trying to sabotage him so I appear more in the right by others I am around.

There is an experience I am following within these moments that I see I go into this blame behavior towards my environment and in these specific moments in relation to this person, and it’s based on a point of my desire for others to pity me and get recognition for the work I feel I am not being recognized for and so I am basically throwing a quantum physical temper tantrum with my physical actions and physical words in moments of my day that are unacceptable. This because I realize I am not only effecting my life, my existence, my environment, but I am also influencing others life, existence, and environment, and directing others either directly in words or actions or indirectly in subtle movements of the quantum physical, but still there is a message I am sending towards others and it’s in it’s starting point within the desire to abuse and make others become lower then myself, so I am the winner and I am the one that benefits.

But this is not benefiting anyone and this is not winning because I am directing others within who I am in each moment in a way of separation and survival, on an unconscious level agree with this separation and survival mentally and behavior we humans exist in as trying to cut people down to get to the top, and through who I am being this is who I am here. A person that abuses others and only looks out for myself and my interest, this is not the way to oneness and equality in my living, this is not the way to taking care of my neighbor as I would myself, this is not the way to be the who I committed myself to be, so I will support myself and walk the self forgiveness and self correction in relation to my starting point and take responsibility for the living I have created in separation written in this blog to change myself to be best for all. Thanks for reading.

Join Us:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site
Living Income Guaranteed Proposal - Site

Day 85- 'I am the Victim' Character

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into the victim character to not have to face my actions/consequences to who I have become in the moment where the victim character was activated, thus when this is activated I realize that this is a point to take note of and change as this is an excuse to not have to face myself and walk the change that is necessary to be walked to take responsibility and honor life as myself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use the victim character to deflect the responsibility and consequence off of me and onto another by believing the lie within myself that it is not my fault and I had nothing to do with it as I realize within myself I am only looking out for my own interest and actually in fear of being caught and confronted so thus I use the victim character to hide essentially from myself and pin the blame on another.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to become the victim character because I fear facing the consequences that I have created thus realizing that this cycle will continue were I will cause abuse and thus create consequence of conflict in my world based on me not considering others and within this will always cycle back and forth because I am missing the key point that this consequence of cycling from conflict to victim is showing me, which is me within in it not taking responsibility for myself and who I am being within the conflict situations thus I will not be able to change myself if I don't see me as the cause and continue to stay as the victim character.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to hide from myself within using this victim character to essentially become like a fake face where I can go into blame and confuse the point to a 'he said - she said' and thus accept and allow the point to continue and allow the consequences for myself and another as abuse to continue when I realize now within the moment I see I start to move into the victim character to stop and breath, and find the point of responsibility I need to stand within and as and walk the solution that is necessary to be walked to create equilibrium with the other honoring ourselves as life in each one and doing what is best for all.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to within myself believe that I am not in the wrong and it is always the other persons wrong doing because within myself I want an easy time at life and not have to push myself to walk the change because I see this as difficult and taking a lot of effort and consistency to do and thus I see that using and going into the victim character is an easy way out. Within this I realize that it may be easy for a moment, but it is the cause to my own self enslavement where I am resisting and limiting myself to an 'easy feeling', where I could walk through the feeling, take responsibility and stop abusing the life that I am and live equal and one. I realize the equality and oneness of life here is through taking responsibility and standing within this point in all facets of our life to thus establish oneness and equality with all, which is the freedom of life here for real and who we are as the substance that create all life here and is within all that exist.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into polarities within this victim character where I will create up dishonest points within the other as they are 'wrong' and I am 'right' and thus create this idea that this is so and this is fact when only I am being considered and in fact I am not walking the shoes of another so no point of absolution such as I am 'right' and another is 'wrong' can be claimed as I am the other and thus I realize that this polarity play-out of absolution as I claim is not in fact real because I am not considering the other who I realize is me and I am just using it to create myself more into a state of victimization so I can gain sympathy from others and get my actions validated.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into false statements within a polarity play-out of I am right and they are wrong within the 'hope' that others will validate me and thus I can gain a sort of energy boost within myself were I will become elated because I got attention and others are 'agreeing' with me. But within this agreement I realize and see that this is based on the dishonesties of ourselves as another is walking in separation as well going into an agreement with one who is in seperation and they themselves are equally trying to gain validation for their dishonest actions and thus it becomes a game of 'losers' where we are losing the chance at real life by taking responsibility for self and all as self and changing to consider the other equal to yourself and correct that within yourself that is not best for all, which would be to stop playing victim and stop abusing life in self interest.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to live into energy as good feelings by abusing others based on my desire to not have to face who I have become here.

I forgive myself myself for allowing and accepting myself to give my power away to ego and fear and thus accept abuse as me and separate me from who I am here as life diminishing myself and abusing life.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow fear to direct me into self diminishment and thus instead accept and allow self interest as survival instead of the survival of all in care for all through living the principles of oneness and equality with all life. I realize and see within and as me that I must stop the fear, stop the self interest, stop my ego from trying to gain over others, and walk the responsibility of my consequences that I have created. Walk the writing and self forgiveness and thus change myself in my living to honor life and myself by living and creating a world that is best for all life through and within my own self living towards myself as all life. This is who we are life not abuse, so I must stop the abuse of others and myself here by stopping my fear and hiding in playing the victim character.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to go into my mind and validate this victim character by participating in the thoughts and accept them that I am right and others are to blame when I realize and see that I am not in consideration of the other but only attempting to validate my own self interest by using my thoughts as justification for the actions I am taking as victim when I realize thoughts are not to be trusted and are a point of enslavement of the human as the mind consciousness system is designed as. Thus I realize I must stop the thoughts of justification and validation of the victim character, and walk the physical process to be physical and not be directed by my mind.

I commit myself to take responsibility for my actions within and as a point where I desire to go into a victim character scenario, but stop and walk the change. I stop, breath, and do not accept and allow myself to use the victim point to point fingers and for a moment get out of facing my responsibility.

I commit to stop the backchat thoughts and diminishment of others within my mind and stand in equality and oneness here with all others in physical reality as breath and slow myself down and do not participate in the mind in self interest, but walk the correction by considering all as myself in physical common sense practical living.

I commit myself to stop my ego and self interest in only considering myself and my own feelings and thus I must stop living for feelings over the best for all life.

I commit to stop abusing life by only considering myself and walk the correction to consider and walk the consideration of all I come into contact with especially when I see that I am about to go into the victim character.
I commit myself to let go of the desire to have others like me and validate me by agreeing with me when I go into this victim character as this is an easy way to make 'friends' as I realize this is self diminishment and not real, only based on characters and self interest to be 'validated' as I am not accepting myself.

I commit myself to accept myself and all life here and walk the correction of acceptance of all and self responsibility for all as myself and walk the walk to a new world where all are honored and all characters cease to exist except the character of life that is here as physical as a breath that I am one and equal with all that exist.


victim, I am a victim, head games, blame game, characters, actors in life, life is a stage, he did it, equality, equal life, eqafe, desteni, 2012, journey to life, garbrielle gabrielle goodrow

Day 53- Not Seeing Myself within the Other

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to deny myself within the other due to desires to compete and take my energies out on other life in blame and self victimization because I don't want to face that part that I see is painful, difficult, or challenging to face as it will take much effort and I fear being exposed.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to desire not to put effort in to who I am as life in correction and thus fully accept the mind as a slave and die a slave to energy and face consequences there of not standing up for life and allowing abuse to proliferate and continue in this world.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear facing myself because I fear being exposed and having others know who I am and thus I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to fear facing myself because I fear who i really am and what I have to walk.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to allow fear to exist within and as me as I realize it is not real and only is created through self to abdicate responsibility to walk the correction in common sense.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to believe that I can hide and escape myself within and as conflict and resistance to others in an attempt to make others responsible for how I am feeling within myself, but within myself I realize that it's me who is creating this feeling, I am the one resisting my own self change due to the addiction to going for the easy way out.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to to deny what I am seeing within myself as abuse and ego and desire to only see it in another based on the fact that I don't want to change and walk the correction which is difficult at times.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to deny the abuse and self irresponsibility that I am existing as and throw it onto another so I can divert the attention away from myself and thus have another point of self escapism to not have to face who I am being within myself.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to not desire to see myself within the other and not see my true nature within who I am being to thus not have to push myself and stop all the points that are needed to be stopped.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to miss me in the other in equality and the gift that this is to self in expression and joy as what can be created.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to miss the other within and as who they are and only see them as a means to an end to get my needs met.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting myself to use others for my own self interest.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to miss myself here within others and who we are as life one and equal.

I commit to stop separating myself from others in an attempt to get my own self interest needs met.

I commit to stand with others by facing myself in all aspects and correct that which I am separating myself from others by so thus I can stand for real in equality and have no movement of ego to abuse for my own gain.

I commit to see myself to stop fear of facing myself and walk the correction.



seeing self in the other, empathy, brotherhood, community living, sisterhood, blame game, im not responsible, equality, equal life, equal money, eqafe, desteni, journey to life, 2012

Day 5- Resentful Based on Blaming Life

I find I am resentful when I do not accept myself fully here and take responsibility for all the points that need to be looked after and kept up, when I fall behind and allow tasks to pile up, I will go into blame towards any point within my world, and then be resentful to those that are on the ball or rather smoothly walking through their day. Missing myself within this point of equality  with others, and thus going into a tantrum because I am not having an easy time and want my life to be easy and enjoyable all the time, and when I don't get this I blame and resent that I see have this and thus justify the abuse of myself like a little kid throwing a tantrum when I dont get what I want and kicking and screaming because I wanted to have it my way.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to react to the responsibilities I have within my life as a choir and as something that is a drag everyday where I would be rather having an enjoyable time and not have so much stuff to do. I see and realize that within myself I am walking at a reasonable pace, I allow myself to fall behind due to laziness and procrastination so I see and realize that this is not due to any fault of being over loading me, but that I am not managing my time well and stalling when I could be walking effectively through pushing through all resistances.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to go into blame towards others in my world due to the belief that they are the cause to whatever it is that I am reacting to at the moment, and thus going into ego as mind to relieve energy that has been built up of frustration and irritation by myself for not being able to be relaxed and have an easy time during my day. I see and realize that within this I am in complete abdication within my responsibility to myself and all life to walk diligence and specificity to thus be able to get all my tasks done and use the tools available to me like budging time and others to help with the work load so that I can get all done and all is well.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to go into thoughts of blame towards others because I do not want to face myself and the obviousness that I am being lazy and procrastinating because I do not want to push myself thru the resistances which is not an easy thing but well worth it and get the work done that has to be done to keep myself going and life flowing. I realize and see that within this point of blame towards another it gives me a momentary way out of facing myself but this will always come back around where I will go into the same behaviors that created this outflow in the first place and lose the opportunity to change by stopping these patterns of laziness and procrastination and directing myself effectively to be effective and get my tasks done as I know I am capable to get done.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting laziness and procrastination to direct me within and as my world when I face resistances to get the manual labor done or get projects done that take effort, and thus go into these mind energies that sabotage my opportunity to change and expand within my living here. I see and realize that allowing these mind energies of procrastinating and laziness only limits me and diminishes me as this is what I am existing as limitation and self diminishment as I am not expanding myself be retracting into myself. I understand and see that I am more then my mind resistances and limitations and thus I push myself to walk through all resistances and mind reactions to thus walk in stability and do whatever it is that needs to be done to get life here one and equal as myself. 

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to react in resentfulness towards other I am blaming due to my desire to take out my anger, irritation, and anxious energies on to others so I don't have to face them and deal with the responsibilities that I have abdicated to know because its has accumulated to such an extent I can't blame any longer as it's obvious the issue is me. I realize and see that resentfulness is a form of spitefulness due to my own lack of self movement and consideration for others and just abusing others because I will not control myself and face myself within what I have created and change to correct this.

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to abdicate myself responsibility to life here and abuse it to gain my own self high through energy build up and release and accepting myself to be spiteful and abusive towards others that are innocent within these situations because I do not want to face myself and push myself, sabotaging myself to live among others in peace and create myself as life here. 

I forgive myself for allowing and accepting to spite life and really I see spiting myself within blaming and resentfulness as I am abdicating my chance to really live as I will not give this to another, but abuse and hurt others because I accept and allow energy to direct me as I have accepted my ego as polarity to play out in my world. I realize and see that allowing energies as mind to direct me through existing within polarity play outs of happy times/hard times, I am creating myself into a vacuum of cycles that only cause abuse to others as I act on this without any self direction and I then diminis myself as I separate myself from life.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My Self Correction:

When and as I go into points of laziness and procrastination, I breath and push through the task I am doing to thus show to myself I don't limit myself nor bound to the energies of the mind. I stop these energies as resistances from directing me and thus I realize I will stop the blame and resentfulness towards others in my world as an outflow of this procrastination and laziness behavior. When and as I stop accepting myself to live into resistances I will build my self will and self trust and thus be able to walk through all my responsibilities and manage my time effective to be the most effective being I can be. Here I breath and allow these energies to pass as I stop myself from reacting and direct myself in oneness and equality with all life as me in what ever comes my way, I stand and walk in common sense for what is best for all.

I commit myself to stop blame and resentfulness towards others in my life as I will take responsibility for myself, and push myself to become effective in my living and do what I can do to help bring equality here.

I commit myself to push through all resistances as they arise always within the direction and discipline of my own self equality and oneness with life as I see and realize what is real is who I am as a living being walking and breathing with and as the equality and oneness of all life.

I commit myself to always consider the other within any point that comes up as blame or resentfulness as I stop these points of self abdication onto another, and I walk the re-alignment with myself with all life to thus be able to solve issues in stability and self responsibility rather then go into the mind and create separation unnecessarily as I realize and see all here is me. 

blaming, resentful, tantrum, life's a drag, lazy people, blame game, labor, mind, energies, reactions, desteni, journey to life, 2012