I have embarked on an agreement process with my partner where we are now living together for the first time, and we are walking through some structural foundational points to start as a base for our living and working together. This is supportive to start and walk such a point especially among partners or in a group so that there is a clear and open understanding that is known by all involved and all get the ability to discuss and come to an agreement on whatever comes up that needs direction. This agreement process is not only within creating a base foundation for work and living together, but also for many smaller even seemingly insignificant points that may come up. What I have found is that what is constantly occupying us is our patterns of behavior we have become accustomed to and always accepted to direct us, and so when an outside point comes in, the point of agreement is important to realign with the group or your partner. If undirected the habitual pattern of behavior may not be best for all or benefiting yourself or others, and so forms of backchat will occur or judgment of another or self has been made, and so this creates a point of discord and potential for misunderstanding and conflict within the group or in the partnership.
The cool thing within the agreement that my partner and I are walking is that we are basing it on principles that each of us have committed and dedicated ourselves to walk for ourselves and so as support for each other, and these principles are self honesty, self writing, self introspection, self forgiveness, and self correction in writing and then in our living. So these are not only principles but tools to help us walk from our mind patterned programs running automatically into the practical reality of our lives with each other and find ways to stop the misunderstandings and create understanding. This happens through communication.
Communication I have found has been one of the key factors to walk through points of conflict or reactions one of us had toward the other, and within the partnership agree to the point of unconditionally opening up the point and discussing it self honestly to find a solution to the conflict, and implement the solution into our lives together. This also sorts out misunderstandings, such as a point that I saw in my partner and assumed a specific thing which created a point of reaction in me towards him, and then once he saw the reaction in me as it was becoming obvious as I was with him, he asked what was up, and then in the moment we discussed the point, aligned it to what in fact is the reality of the situation through understanding each one’s point of view, and then coming to an agreement with how we are going to live it in our lives together or individually depending on the specifics of the point.
So it’s been extremely supportive I have found to not only have the principles of supporting each other as an equal to self, but communicating about all points that come up that cause any kind of reaction meaning assumption, judgment, emotion or feeling within self, and discussing it with the other so it does not accumulate to something bigger then it indeed has to be. It is essentially a point of prevention and efficiency in one’s living to prevent points from brewing out of control in the mind realms, which has been the way in human interactions, but changing to be aligned into physical living where both agree and discuss to a solution, and so enjoy the time we do have together rather then creating assumptions and animosity towards each other. I personally have had enough of the secret mind activity and blame/judgment towards another when that is really unacceptable, where I can take responsibility for myself, investigate the point within writing or with my partner in communication, and find solutions to whatever it is that I/we are facing. Communicating clears the air so to speak and makes life more enjoyable for all once solutions have been made through agreements of everyone involved; using the principle of what is best for all ensures an agreement will indeed be made and so all will benefit equally. If you are interested in more on agreements or the tools of self support, please check out the links below. Thanks for reading.
Agreement Course - Desteni I Process - Relationship Support
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site
Living Income Guaranteed Proposal - Site