Day 104 – Making Father Proud

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire, from since I can remember, to want to make my father proud of me because I looked up to him for what he did within work and how he always was there for me and took care of us to the best of his ability within the matrix in terms of working and keeping us surviving.

­­I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself as a child to desire for my father to think I was the ‘best’ within all my sisters and thus I would find ways such as working around the house or excelling in what I was doing such as sports to give reason for my dad to like me over my other sisters.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in competition with my sisters because I compared myself to them and thus saw myself within a polarity play out as positive/negative, and thus used points such as athletics which I knew my dad thought was important and thus competed with my sisters to show my dad that I am the best in any point that was brought up that I could compete.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into jealousy towards my sisters due to comparison and thus compete with them to show off to my father that I am the best daughter based on what I can do physically and which grew into intellectually as I started to go to school and such, realizing that I could use my intellect in competition with my sisters as I saw that I was able to become the best in this field as well amongst my sisters.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get an energy boost of positive/good feelings when my dad would say ‘you are the smartest kid we have’ and thus become superior within my stance and behavior towards my sisters because I got this confirmation from my dad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become energized and thus go into a superior stance towards my sisters when I am told that ‘I am the smartest’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that in terms of who I am with my sisters, that we are equals, within our expressions we are different and thus I realize that to go within an energy as being superior to them is ego and thus the mind as a character to suit myself interest and make me feel more then others because within myself I feel inferior to people, so thus I can make myself feel better by making others feel less then me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into the ego character as being superior to my sisters and thus make sure they know that I was found to be more intellectual then them by my dad, and thus make myself feel better.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into ego towards my sisters when I was told I was the smartest, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the comment as a form of self interest for my own self to feel better, instead of correcting the point with my dad in telling him that that statement is a form of separation as we are all here as equals and thus only walk in practicality with others in what has to be done and who will be the best fit to do it and stop the ego.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my sisters and go into ego where in I play that I am more when in fact I am feeling less then them as I have judged and compared myself to them, and thus use this point that my dad said of ‘I am the smartest’ and thus go into superiority because I feel less then.

I commit myself to stop this point of going into this point of desiring to make my dad proud of me in a point of trying to be better then my sister, and thus I commit to create an environment where ever I am where I walk as an equal and contribute to the whole in the best ways I can in consideration and acceptance of all equal to myself.

I commit myself to stop comparison and judgment towards my sisters and thus stop the point of competition that I create with them to be the best and thus I stop the point of getting my dad to see me as perfect as well.

I commit myself to stop this point of desire to be the best with others in my world thus I realize I must stop the comparison and judgment thoughts, words, and deeds that I participate in.

I commit myself to walk the process of letting go of the ego character and thus start the process of re-walking my living with others in equality and oneness through physical practical living.

I commit myself to walk the point of humbleness by putting myself always in the shoes of another and stop the point of being a bully.

I commit myself to accept myself through equalizing myself with the physical so thus I can stand equal and accept all as myself here as who we are as life. 

For Further Support, Please check out Links:

Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki



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