Monday, May 4, 2020

Shame - Part 2 - Living this as A Gateway to our Best Self - Day 595

Through the experience of shame, this shame is when one do something in one's life that creates an outflow in one's behavior that cause harm and abuse in some way, and is in one's face, eventually when we do not in fact take self responsibility for our actions, these points of self compromise and regrettable actions will be lived out. We don't often consider or become aware of our shameful acts, I know before I was walking the desteni i process, I would not very much take note of the times where I did something to cause harm to another. And when I did, all i wanted to do was escape the event or the people and move onto something that made me feel good inside myself, though the shameful occurrence is a truth now and did in fact happen, this fact can't be denied forever. 

So it's not going to go away, it can be suppressed and buried within, but doesn't ever go away and thus will in turn happen again through time because I did not learn from the last event and I didn't do anything to change the outcome to be something different. Thus in this terrible game I play with myself, i not only weaken and harm my own self integrity and self core as a Living being among all other life and life forms that reside among me, I harm and weaken others around, which creates rippled outflows from beings they will touch and integrate with, and thus exponential abuse is created by my one single action to abdicate responsibility and live out my self irresponsibility to change who I am to be able to stand the outflow of what is best for all, thus why not just face the shame and change myself to be a better human being here now, what better opportunity then the one's life gifts to us as our self experiences day in and day out, breathe by breathe. 

At last, until I finally realized the power of self forgiveness and self will in the corrections of myself that is best for all in my self commitments statements, I did not realize the full and total impact my actions not only have on my mental, spiritual, and physical well being, but every other living thing I touch, which in fact is everything, cause self is one and equal to the physical and thus life itself within to the without. Shame I have found to see my false face and find the grace I was equally given by life itself, to give it another chance to see a better way and for me to take that opportunity and create something more and better for myself and so every being I will touch from that moment forward. So we have extraordinary impact in this life, for better or worse, this always defined and refined by self, and I highly suggest the desteni i process tools to work through who we are as shame and the outflows this creates. 

This the kind of commitment I found was required to walk through my shameful acts and really self investigate who I am within myself to in fact give myself the ability to change in the next moments it could occur again. A never giving up on self's ability to learn and change and a point of self willingness to push into unknown territory and suffering in ways, this when one finally face the shame of self and build up the self empowerment of proven living change to do better for oneself and others, you become a being who is not moved, can move self and direct self into eternal life by living and creating for oneself life to others as how you would want it best for yourself.

Also, a willingness to push oneself always beyond what one thought possible, this I found doesn't have to be an extreme type experience, but to in the moments that open up in your day to day life when you face a challenge, to walk through the fear and face the challenge....and build on this each and every day, to each and every moment it opens up in your world. I am not saying this is all you do all day long, no, just be aware of yourself in your day to day moments and start learning how you operate, the mechanics of self. So working with the moments that bring me shame and I started to become aware of these moments by actively taking self responsibility, I found the point of building oneself up over time, slow but sure, with consistency is the most efficient and effective way to just get it done. It's a slow process, but highly interactive and fascinating, and this i found the gift in living the word shame. 

Shame I have redefined as being ashamed - a- sham (false) - e (expression), so it's a false face I am putting on within myself to mask the real evil (= live in reverse) of who I am being and how I am living in moments with myself and so into moments with others in my actual physical everyday moments. Most of the abuse is in specific personality types I have accepted and allowed to live out, such as self inferiority, self righteousness, ego patterns, and much more, though it was patterned and over time I learned my self abusive patterns through the tools and practice daily of listening to, applying self forgiveness in writing and out loud, and commitment statements for myself through learning from writing each forgiveness statements I made. This so the next time I face this shame and stopping the compounding of abuse, I had a directive in my awareness that I spoke or wrote and was able to redirect my living into a way forward that is best for myself and so best for all I meet. So the shift happens in awareness from the mind disturbances to what and how can I change my physical living to be more efficient in my living mechanics of myself, the way I operate, and how my thoughts, words, and actions has a rippled exponential effect for better or worse. 

And I repeated this over and over until I was satisfied with my self honesty within myself in the process point I was practicing changing. I followed my gut and now recognize this as my self core, self honesty, inner voice, sanctuary that I have created within myself. This inner guide and self honesty support with how to move in my reality, what is best to do, how best can I support live, and where can i make a difference to be a better me, more efficient, more impactful is key to self creation i have found in a way that benefit all. 

The sky of life is the limit as far as I am concerned, and within the limits of life principle in what is best for all, certainly heaven on earth can be created by correcting the inner mechanics of self into the outer by common sense self sustainability in taking self responsibility for one's actions. Being ashamed is difficult yes, but I see it as a gift to my highest potential as motivation to move from what I know to be not who I really am into the being that I know i can be, the best of myself as I give myself to others the best I am able to and living this until its proven in the physical. 

Thanks for reading and please feel free to leave any comment or questions if you see fit.

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