Opening Up Confidence within the Mind – Money – Part 6 – Day 366

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This is a Series, here are the others for reference:
My Experience Before and After Beginning Process with Animals and Nature – Part 1- Day 361
Horses and People– Before/After Starting Process with Animals and Nature Part 2 – Day 362
Horses and People – Before/After Starting Process with Animals and Nature – Part 3 - Day 363
Opening Up Confidence In the Mind – Before/After Starting to Walk Process – Part 4 – Day 364

My Experience with Confidence In Appearance - Part 5 - Day 365

Money has been a steady point within my life where I have gained confidence within myself from, if I have money then I am more able to do what I want and so get what I want. I also find I have gained a sort of arrogance that I disguise as confidence within my ability to make money and get money in my pockets if need be. I have been fortunate in this life to have connections where I am able to get a job and work, and I have found by using principles within my work environment such as loyalty, hard work, giving my best effort, considering others has helped me ensure an income and ensure I keep a job because I perform at a level that people like. So some cool points as well as points I have to work on because I use my ego to gain respect from others and demanding it as well through pushing my abilities and my know-how of the job to get myself heard or seen and so create rifts within areas in my life that are unacceptable and are not a way I would like to continue living.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to gain confidence through working and demanding others recognize my skill through the confidence I present in a way that is arrogant at times.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become arrogant with others and within myself towards others because within myself I have judged them as less then me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am better then others in the work place because I am able to move projects ahead and so believe that others are not working hard enough.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have the right to be confident in the justification as a belief that I work harder then others and so see others as a point of not doing enough where I believe I am doing more then them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others as not working hard enough and so become confident and so arrogant within myself towards them instead of ensuring I am doing my best and so be able to support others to do this as well.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge others for there work ethic and make myself more in my own mind to gain this experience of confidence I desire within myself. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge others as a problem in the work environment without pushing myself to stand equal to them and see where it is that I myself am not working at my best and so turn around to face myself and ensure my work is optimal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe because I have the ability to make money and have money that I am more worthy then others who are not able to do this, and so gain confidence within the fact that I can make money where I see others can’t.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am more then others because of my ability to make money where this is not the true worthiness or measure of a man. I realize it is what one do with what one has and how they live and care for the life with what they have that is one and equal to how self would want to be treated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed the belief that money measures a persons worth and created an idea that this makes them more if they are able to make more money.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to create an idea that if one makes more money then they are worth more and so create an energetic response within myself as being more then others and so feeling more important, inflating my ego.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed an energetic response as feeling more then another based on money worth to satisfy my desire to be important in life and so create a separation with others based on this desire of being more worthy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be more then others because within myself I feel less then many people I meet.

-I will continue with the insecurity points later in this series.

When and as I see I go into a point of confidence based on an idea that money makes me more worthy or more important then another, I stop and breath, and realize that this only separates me from physical reality with others and the solutions we can come up with to ensure all are equally cared for and supported, and end the point in my mind of the polarity that an experience needs to take place, I am here like all others and that is who we are, here in this physical reality all of us together and so we must ensure all are consider as this is what demands of this physical reality to function in balance which is what makes sense always.

I commit myself to let go of the idea that money makes another more worthy then someone who doesn’t have it or can’t make enough.

I commit myself to let go of the belief that I am important because I can make money and become confident within myself towards others based on this belief.

I commit to let go of the experience of confidence based on an idea and desire to be more.

I commit to walk as myself in facing who I am within myself when I go and judge another and see within my life I am doing the same thing and change myself.

I commit to change my living from the mind to the physical and support solution that will support everyone to have money and a life of decency in the best way possible.

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Day 298 – Self Judgment – Is Comparison the root of all Evil?

What I have realized through excellent support within the series on eqafe, The Metaphysical Secrets of Imagination – specifically in regards to walking through the dimensions of self judgment, and how in essence it is based on a point of bullying, punishing, and sabotage oneself through one’s own hand so to speak as thoughts, backchat, imaginations, pictures, and memories one participate in based on comparisons one has made and continues to exist within through out ones days and eventually one’s life. And so, I as self judgment through comparison define myself constantly and continuously through my external world through polarities based on my own self interest desires of wanting to be perfect for others, and so I stay trapped within the mind in abuse as there is no end to this because it’s impossible to fulfill as it is not real, it’s in my mind, and the mind and reality never match up.

Comparison is not a single event that one does and then just leaves from that moment to the next, it stays with you over time and through time, and you define and continue to redefine yourself from this external view of the mind as a comparison over and over and over again, seeming that it is a new scenario cause it is a new environment, but it’s the same pattern repeating in the mind.

Comparison is the root of all evil of self I found based on the nature of who one is within it, this for me has always been me against myself, not being satisfied with who I am in some parts and thus desiring to make these parts better through seeing what it look like and trying to change it to be that. But what is not realized within this on the surface is the amount of self judgment, anger, jealousy, and resentment is built because within the physical aspect I do not like for instance, I can never change, I mean I can’t reconstitute my physical body to be different shaped, different look, different position, it’s impossible, so I am fighting the impossible basically not realizing that this fight is and will continue to go no where. But I continue because there is that time where I am more, I do have a comparison where I am better, so then I feel good again about myself. It’s like an unconscious sleep walking cycle I have been living in, seeing myself powerless to stop this based on not realizing that there was another way, that is where desteni has stepped in and stepped up to show me how to correct these points and stay committed to do this.

Within the mind of the human, we like to create that which isn’t actually there in reality, but more often then not I define myself and determine who I am based on this conclusion of the results of my mind imaginations, and thus based on desires and not common sense, I search for this impossibility as perfection within the ideal picture I have created in my mind of this. Now I realize that the physical can and will never match up with my mind because the mind doesn’t and can not take physical reality into consideration. The mind is creating itself from memories as thoughts that are stored within the physical body, and uses this database of memories to define self to it’s own optimum outcome not in consideration of me as the self in equality, but in the interest of itself as an energy generator. The mind is after energy, and me as self judgment within the constant dueling of this judgment through comparison through jealousy, superiority, inferiority, and a whole host of other emotions and feelings that are activated within these scenarios in my world are fueling the mind continuously  And so the mind is gaining a lot of energy for it’s own generation of itself within and as the physical body, and all the while I as the life force within the physical body am living in misery and instability.

I realize I am doing this to myself, I am the being within the mind and within my body accepting and allowingto be directed by energy and desires, and thus seeing what I am doing to myself as the abuse to my body mentally and physically, and the abuse to others as anger outburst, jealousy, and arrogance. I am here to take responsibility for this pattern once and for all of comparison and self judgment, and thus use the tool of comparison for what is best for all in practical physical considerations, stopping making it about me, and use it for what it’s purpose is, compare what is here and find what is best.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

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Day 229 – Control Freak Character – Arrogance and Deception

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe myself to be better and more able to handle work loads then others because within myself I have believed myself to be more in tune and able to handle the demands of my work then others, and also that I can’t depend on others to get it done the work done like I can, so I’ve created an air of arrogance towards others based on a resentment that I have created because I believe I am doing more work and I am not being recognized for this.

When and as I go into a point of belief that I am more equipped and able to handle the demands of the work over others and then become arrogant in a belief that I am not being recognized, I stop and breath, and realize that this arrogance is based on me seeing myself within a if this, then that scenario, where I see me as the only point that will do the work sufficiently and so then I should get all the benefit and praise. When I am not getting this I will get angry with others and act rude because I believe I am justified in doing so because I deserve more then them. I realize within this that I am not justified as I have created this belief in my mind and have not considered all the components seen and unseen in self honesty of what others do and have done, and thus am only considering my side of the story in my desire for praise.

I commit myself to let go of this point of belief that I am more equipped and able to do the work over others better, and work on my work and stop the point of desire for praise and to be more then others.

I commit myself to when I go into this pattern of arrogance towards others, stop and go back to my physical work until I have sorted this point out within writing and walked the point to an understanding within myself as solution that is equal for both and no abuse exist any longer.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become arrogant because I believe myself to be more dependable then others and that I can always be trusted to do the best job. I realize that within this dependability, I have fallen on this point and not been able to complete what it is I set in front of me to do, but then blame others for the same points I do myself.

When and as I go into this point of blame and arrogance at others and not even fulfill this within myself in what I am blaming of another for, I stop and breath, and do not accept myself to go there, as I realize that this is not fair and not self honest as I am causing blame and abuse, but being deceptive within myself because I am doing the same thing.

I commit myself to not allow myself to go into a point of blame and arrogance towards another and investigate immediately what is it that I am not facing within myself and stop the lying and deception of myself and to others.

I commit to stop the blame of others, and start walking my own process of self doing and living, letting others walk there process, assist if I can, and support myself to stand equal with others in actually living what I speakand stop my hiding in blame and arrogance when I have no right to or foot to stand on.

I commit to stop my deception within lying to others within the blame towards them and manipulating to be seen as more then them so I can be seen as special..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be manipulative in trying to down size others and make myself look better because within me I am not confident and thus use arrogance to hide this fact that I am really self insecure. I realize and see that these points are showing the lack of care I have towards others, but only looking to make myself more so I can get ahead. This causing others to be seen by myself not in what is real and in equal value, I realize this is not life and is not who I want to be towards others.

When and as I go into a point of reacting in arrogance towards another to hide my own self insecurities and thus try and seem more then others to get attention, I stop and breath and do not accept this, as I realize that it is not what is really happening within me as I am manipulating others to make myself seem more then I am, and this is not who I want to be and stand as, as I wouldn’t want another to do this to me.

I commit myself to not accept myself to go into this point of manipulating others to get what I want, by saying ‘no I don’t accept myself to walk in this way of gaining over others and using rudeness and deception to get ahead.’

I commit myself to let go of this insecurity and walk the process to be self-sufficient and do the work to the best of my ability in what it is that I am to do in self honesty and equal consideration of all involved to the best of my ability.

I commit to stop the competition with others and stop the arrogance, because I am equal and one to all other life that is here, I am not more special, I commit myself to stop participating in this desire to be more then others, and walk the physical actions of showing my support of equality towards others as we are all life and this is what life is equal in value among all.


For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site