Showing posts with label insecurity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label insecurity. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

How to Know Yourself Intimately and the Desteni I Process - Day 529





How has the desteni i process supported me with knowing myself in a more intimate way where I can trust myself and walk a path beyond my fears and limitations. My purpose is walking this process is to become a steward of the earth and create a world that is best for all, the children to come, and stand as the solution within a self integrity that I trust within myself because I have walked each step of the way in forming self trust and self change that I am proud of. For more listen to the audio so you to can support yourself to live your highest potential.

More links to support:

Soul - School of Ultimate Living - Create yourself through Words!

Self Supportive Material - 

Desteni-I-Process Lite Beginner course - 

Forum support: 

Desteni Wiki: 

Eqafe Facebook Page: 

7 year journey to life Facebook group: 

DIP Lite on Facebook: 

Thursday, December 26, 2013

My Experience with Confidence In Appearance - Part 5 - Day 365



Visit more cool art here: Desteni Artists
Featured Artist: Matti Freeman


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to define myself within the experience of myself as confident when I see when looking in the mirror I get a positive energy kick as I see that within my idea of the picture in my mind has been satisfied and I am feeling confident to go out in public and face others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to base my feeling of who I am through an experience of positive feelings when I see myself in the mirror and am satisfied with what I see and that have the thought that ‘now I can go and feel confident in myself’.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a picture in my mind that I have to fufill and satisfy before I will go out with others and if I don’t satisfy this picture the feeling of confidence ends and I become insecure proving that this confidence is not in fact real because it depends on other factors rather then a living of it within myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define my confidence level based on the picture I see in the mirror and feel anxiety and fear when in public if I don’t have a picture that I am satisfied with when I look in the mirror.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself worth and confidence within myself based on my picture in the mirror rather then the who I am as a person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow the mind when I have the thought ‘now I can go and feel confident in myself’ and so go into public and feel better about myself due to this conclusion that I look my best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to follow the energy of positive feelings as excitement and a comfortableness if I am satisfied with the picture I see in the mirror and then become more comfortable in public situations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to when looking in the mirror and I am not satisfied with the way I look and accept the thought of ‘man, I look ugly  right now’ and so go into public feeling less comfortable and more anxious around other people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to backchat and judge others based on what they look like and compare there look with mine, and so feel confident or not based on the way I compare to others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to feel better about myself through accepting the positive energy as excitement or comfortableness when I see myself as more then others and so get a sense of confidence within myself and become more comfortable with being in public with people.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel better about myself within myself if I am more then others within my mind through judgment of others around me and base my experience of myself on this judgment I have made in feeling more or less then others.

When and as I see I am going into my mind and comparing myself to a mirror image of myself or with another and judging it as good/bad, I stop and breath, and realize this is being enslaved within a polarity of positive and negative that will continue as I separate myself from others and my own living through judgment. I realize I will only be able to live in equality and so true self confidence if I build it through my actions and words based on the actual reality of what is here including and accepting all as myself.

I commit to stop judging and sizing myself up and others in my mind.

I commit to let go of the energy of feeling good or bad about myself and accepting myself in that moment absolutely.

I commit to stop the backchat thoughts of polarity of ugly/beautiful.

I commit myself to build confidence in myself through the way I build myself over time through self responsibility and living in a principled way and following through.

I commit myself to stop judging others.

I commit myself to stop judging myself.


I commit myself to accept myself and push with all people by become comfortable with myself.


Eqafe Interview Support that I Recommend:

Insecurity: Introduction - Atlanteans - Part 148
Insecurity: Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans - Part 149
Insecurity: Insecurity-Confidence Polarity - Atlanteans - Part 150
Confidence: Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans - Part 151
Confidence: Practical Support - Atlanteans - Part 152
Confidence: The End - Atlanteans - Part 153


Join Us:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site
Living Income Guaranteed Proposal - Site
Equal Money System - Site

Monday, December 23, 2013

Horses and People – Before/After Starting Process with Animals and Nature – Part 3 - Day 363



So I am at the farm and now have committed with Cerise to three months of daily responsibility to work with horses, I was quite excited about this, but also nervous because I didn’t know what to expect.  Cerise first showed me how to take care of Fat, how to clean his hooves, how to clean the poo and the pee hay, how to look for ticks, how to move him and communicate with him through touch, but I most enjoyed the walking with him to the camps where the horses grazed and spent there day. I walked with Cerise the first couple days, and then she would give me the reigns and I would get to walk with Fat on my own. This at first took a bit of getting use to, but again there were communication methods to allow him to know when to stop, or move faster, or slow down, so there was a constant point of hereness within the horse and myself when we were together to ensure safety. Well, I was not always here with Fat because a lot of the time I was in my mind. When cleaning the stables or walking the horses, it is actually very quiet, well there is people speaking around you, but you are alone in the stable and you just do the job that is here to do mostly on your own, so I observed myself often in these moments due to this quietness that naturally emerged in these times.

I found when I was physically moving and doing the daily responsibility directly with the horse, like cleaning his hooves or checking for ticks, I was more at ease and more natural within my expression, I didn’t feel fear or unsafe in anyway, I did use caution, but I was not in such a state as how I was when I began the care with him, I was more comfortable. I remember the most interesting point was when I would look into the Fat’s eyes, I would see him staring back at me and within myself I knew that he was here with me, he could see me as I could see him, it was more in depth though then looking into a humans eyes like looking into my dogs eye like he could see beyond my mind and beyond the thinking, and it felt like he looked within the core of myself. I always felt like I had to look away, like I was being exposed and felt silly in ways for looking so directly into the horses eyes and his direct look back, but I realized this reaction within me was was a reflection of myself, Fat was showing me to me, that I am embarrassed and afraid to look within the core of who I am, the in depth person that I have become, and the acceptances and allowances I have created within myself and left hidden and suppressed for so many years. It’s like all that opened up and got exposed in that moment where we looked into each other’s eyes.

The reflection he showed me of myself was based on the construct of the mind within the confident and insecure polarity play out I have existed as for many years.  The confidence I very much tried and portrayed in those moments I was with the others at the farm, ensuring I was being seen as strong, cool, and had my self together, but within me this creating the opposite as an insecurity because I did not live up to those ways I desired to be because they weren’t real, they were just thought up in my mind and how I desired for myself to be, but in reality this is not how I lived, I was anxious, reserved, and quite judgmental of myself and cared a lot about how I was seen, and so created a lot of self sabotage and insecurity that effected everything about my day to day living. Fat the horse just within looking in my eyes, opened up a whole mind construct that I have allowed for some time and did not want to face, and now I will open and support myself and change to stand with Fat and all beings and look into there eyes and be equal and one here, no movement, but expression of self.


More to come in the next blog. Thanks for reading.

Interview Support I Recommend from Eqafe:

Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 1
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 2
Birthing a new Life through the Eyes of a Horse - Part 3

Join Us:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site
Living Income Guaranteed Proposal - Site
Equal Money System - Site