My Journey to Life: authority

Showing posts with label authority. Show all posts

Monday, May 12, 2014

Knowing When To Let Go and Knowing When to Push - Day 412

A point came up within work that I would like to open up and clear within myself in terms of how I will live the correction and also to get some understanding into why I go into such a reaction as I do, and the point is becoming overly zealous within a point I want to direct at work, but within my position in the business I do not have the authority to do so. So the consequences this creates is me becoming angry and annoyed within myself and towards other’s within the business where I am not able to be here in reality, but am within my head reacting. I see that what I go into that creates this drive to take control and direct things is that I am imagining myself as the point that is needed to create change, and so enforce it and push it when in reality I don’t have that authority or position and cause consequences that are not beneficial for myself or others.

So the point I am realizing and have been supported to see is that within the world system and business especially, there are times to act and there are times to step back. There are times to push a point and there are times where pushing is not supportive, so it’s discerning these actions within the context of what it is I am doing and who/what I am working with, to then decide and give the proper direction to myself to support the end result of what is best for all.

I have the tendency to want to always push and not accept that I can’t do something or am limited within a certain aspect of my life, such as the authority structure at my job, so this is a point I would like to walk in self forgiveness to clear it and be able to see reality for what it is and make the decision of self direction that will support what is best for all. Whether that be speaking up or pushing a point or stepping back and finding other means to walk a point or even simply letting it go for the time being where I see my actions will not support a result that is best for all.

So I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize, see, and understand that within life situations that are occurring in my world I am not always in a position to step forth and direct situations in the way that I see will support and change what is occurring as others may not be ready or I may simply not have the authority to do so.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that within myself I always have to push and take action within scenarios in my world where I see change is necessary and needed and so I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand that within the world system as it is currently there are times where I will have to step away and let go of a point due to who and where I am within the structure in the system/business.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist standing down and becoming limited within my position where I will push and push until I am heard even when I realize, see, and understand it’s causing adverse consequences to myself and others within the point I am walking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the belief that I am right in situations and not see, realize, nor understand that the reality of what is here is what I have to work with and direct in real time, and so I let go of my desires within my mind to win/be right and walk what is necessary in the physical to support what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe to be more qualified to make and direct others based on me being self investigatory and walking the process of self change not realizing, seeing, and understanding that within this action of separation within believing I am more/better I am catering to my ego in my mind dimensions and not walking/supporting the solution in what is best for all in physical reality.

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to consider the all of who and how I am effecting others within my actions, words, and thoughts, and so only cater to my self interest in gaining energy through creating the scenarios where I will receive praise/attention within gaining a presence at work, not realizing, seeing, and understanding that I am not walking a supportive process with the people at work or within the business world because I am not considering everyone just my desires and fulfillment of these desires to gain a feeling I am addicted to.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to only desire to get what I want fulfilled not walking or living the realizations I see in the moment of how I am acting in self interest, and so continue to act in a way that is not supportive to all and what is best because it feels good and I feel justified in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my behavior of pushing and creating consequences of abusing others and myself, when I see, realize, and understand the solution that is here to walk to support myself and others in physical reality to do what is best for all, this within walking and living self honesty and common sense in real time living assessments and through writing/planning what is best and will be best.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act and so live within a point of energy and feeling rather than breathing, being in reality, assessing the situation in self honesty, and walking a self directed decision that is best for all in common sense.

When and as I see I am going into my mind and only considering what I want and desire to happen and so push this regardless of what reality is showing me, I stop and breath, and realize that this action is not stable and will cause consequences that I can see are not going to benefit me or others within the environment I am working within. I realize I have to ensure I take all I can see and understand into consideration and so walk a process that is reality based and make decision within these lines in common sense.

I commit myself to walk the reality of what is here by breathing and writing out the point where I list pros and cons, and assess what is my standing and ability in the moment to direct myself to solutions that are best for all within the structure I am living within such as within my job/business world.

I commit myself to not give up and push what I see is best for all but I also commit to ensure I am walking in a way that is the most supportive for all and bringing a point of solution to all.

I commit myself to stand as an example for others and so within this I commit myself to live self discipline and integrity within myself to walk what is best for all in real time assessments by putting myself in others shoes and walking what makes sense.

I commit to stop my desires/self interest through stopping my feelings/emotions from directing me, and write the point out to see what the solution is and then live it in real time until I have proven to myself that the solution of what is best is who I am.

Cool Support to Help Walk the Business World:
Creating the Business Mind - The Soul of Money
Building Your Business - The Soul of Money
Building Your Business (Part 2) - The Soul of Money
Business Resolve - The Soul of Money
Time = Money - The Soul of Money
Taking Your Emotions out of Your Business - The Soul of Money
Moving Your Staff and Your Business Forward - The Soul of Money

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Monday, March 4, 2013

Day 241 – Leadership and the Mean Character – Self Correction to Live

Please reference this blog for understanding and context to this post, thanks.

When and as I see I am going into a point of ego when I am given responsibility within a leadership role, I stop and breath, and realize that within this belief and idea that I am chosen or special due to this appointment of leadership over others I am engaging in my ego and thus allowing and accepting the abuse and competitionbetween me and those I am with which is not necessary. I realize I can walk within equality within this leadership role, and thus lead within practical and logistic points, and stop the mind experience of being more because I realize I am not, we are equal.

I commit myself to become aware of my physical body when I am given a leadership position or responsibility, and do not accept any form of mind experience, breathing through it and writing down what in fact I am looking to do and walk within this newly appointed set of responsibilities or leadership position.

I commit myself to stop the desire when it arises of being seen as more special or believing myself to be more special because I was chosen to be a leader.

I commit myself to when I see I am engaging in this belief of being and desiring to be seen as more special, I breath, and walk the point of realizing that we are equal, I am not special this is a mind delusion I have created to make me lose focus and not stay in the physical.

I commit myself to stop the anger and resentment of energy emotions when they arise when I don’t receive the leadership position and another does.

When and as I see myself go into a point of judgment of superior/inferior based on who I see as the leader within my reality and those who are not, I stop and breath, and realize that this is really sabotaging my own self standing with others and not allowing myself to be able to really see or hear others and what they are saying or living within their world, which I realize create more conflict and confusion when I am herestanding as an example to live equal.

I commit myself to stop this point of judgment of others and walk an equal process of physically moving myself to walk with them in what it is that I can support with as well as here support from others.

I commit myself to stop my definition of myself from outside sources by embracing me in these moments and realizing what I am able to accept of myself and walk in correction to thus stand stable and equal with life rather then be in comparison with it.

I commit to accept myself and walk the process of becoming self perfected in my life where there is no gauge by external forces but that which I live and assess in self honesty due to my own self awareness in how I live.

I commit myself to stop and investigate all points in my mind when I go into a comparison and stop the participation to others and walk the solution by treating others as I would want to be treated.

I commit to walk a process of humbleness by standing as an equal with another and walking the point of unconditional support regardless of who or what they are, I walk in equality.

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Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
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Sunday, March 3, 2013

Day 240 – Leadership and the Mean Character

For further reference on the mean character, please read these following blogs:

Day 237 – Walking with Others – Why People see me ...
Day 238 – Mean Character – Militant Biatch
Day 239 - Mean Character - Self Commitments

I find within this point of responsibility I put myself in of leadership, I will become very rigid and strict inseeing that things get to a point where we will be able to accomplish our goals, I find within observing myself within this scenario of being responsible for others and the goal set us for us to do, is that I will go into fearand anxiety that I will fail and in turn be seen as not able to lead by those I deem as higher in authority to me, and thus not able to handle my responsibilities and be seen as someone who is not capable in what once wasthought that I could do.

I have a very hard time with this being demoted essentially as this kills my ego in my sense of self as the one that can handle all things, that can do it all, and that can become the leader that I am seen to be able to be. I will then become this mean person where I will direct others and not be self honest within the way and how I am conducting myself to get the goals met, this by force on others through words rather then being equal with others and allowing them to lead themselves essentially with the support and tools that I put in place to make it work for all.

I will be doing self forgiveness on this fear of being seen incapable when I am put in a leadership position and thus won’t allow myself to fail or others, and become mean when this is this case.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself within the idea that I must be capable and follow through in all responsibilities I take on especially those given to me by others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as special or chosen within this point of another giving my leadership or responsibility within a project or point that we are working on, and thus allow this to go to my head and think then that I am better then others rather then see it as a point where I have potential for making the project work strictly within what it is that was assigned to me or simply because I am the best person with the right skill set for the job.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare myself to others within those who are in leadership positions and me as well, and see and gauge where it is that I am seen among the group or am placed to thus define myself within this perceived ranking I have made up in my mind and then thus define myself by this and treat others in a superior/inferior stance in relation to how I have defined myself.

I forgive myself that I will then within this perceived rank I have created for myself as either more or less then others will go and treat those I perceive as less then me within a strictness and forcefulness to get the work done correctly, and those I perceive as superior to me in a way that is kind and honoring them for them to see me in a high regard.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise my self and how I live towards others based on my mind and an idea that I am some how more or less based on a point of position I was asked to do or not do, and thus see myself within this view of better or worse related to others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself based on others seeing me capable or not and thus define myself based on the actions of others who are in leadership positions for me to see where I stand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise my own self integrity to the ego of myself in desiring to be more and seen as more from those who are seen within high status in my circles or where I am at, and thus desire their approval so then I can be satisfied with myself because I have the approval who those who are at the top.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compromise my own self integrity to those who are not in a leadership position and thus become this person who is more then them by being demanding and mean within my behavior and words for them to do something that I expect them to do in perfection, where in I do not do this to myself and expect the same for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deceive myself within my actions due to this desire to be seen as special by those I see as more then me and thus abuse those within those I see as less then me based solely on the fact that I am defining who I am by others, and thus am determined and living from theacceptance of those around me and becoming a demon in the making because I am not seeing what I am doing as the meanness that I am living towards others, but jst seeing my desire to be seen by those that I want to impress as more and good at what I do, when in reality I am not good as in treating all as good and working towards a solution, but being good by forcing the results through strictness within my words.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use force in words toward others to make them do what I want instead of walking the process of correction within what it is in the process with another that is not working, walking patience’s and gentleness as how I would want for myself.

Self commitments to follow.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Day 239 - Mean Character - Self Commitments

When and as I go into a point of passive aggressiveness towards others in my words or mannerism, I breath and stop, and realize that within this way of living towards others I will create consequence of abuse and conflict as I am not considering others as equal but really in self interest to have it my way rather then coming to a solution that is best for the group.

I commit myself to when I see I go into this point of being passively aggressive towards another I breath, and do not speak or get some space and investigate the point of my reaction and correct it before I engage in the point again.

I commit myself to move through the desire to have it my way or no way, by implementing and pushing solutions that will work for all and have clear direction and consequence so all points are understood.

When and as I see I am going to backchat about the patterns of thought of blame from another, I stop and breath, as I realize this is not acceptable or real as it’s a point that I am using within my mind to make me right and the other wrong within only terms that benefit me and are based on my own perception not fact.

I commit myself to stop my backchat and internal conversations whenever they come up by realizing that this is not based on fact and thus realize it is only a point to serve myself, I use the physical to help stabilize myself in what is real, and not allow this to accumulate within me.

I commit myself to move the energy of anger and irritation through me by grounding it into the earth through my body, and not allow it to direct me through breathing and investigate why it is occurring and correct it through self forgiveness and self commitments.

I commit myself to stop all forms of aggression towards other and practice putting myself in their shoes and becoming humble to walk the solution that is equal and ends my self interest as ego.

I commit myself to clearly state the expectations of a project and clearly state and give time to integrate and ask questions and adapt to procedure before consequences is put in place, and thus I commit to walk the consequence within a understood term in what is known and not base it off my emotion and experiences in moments of energy bursts.

I commit myself to stop assumptions and stop walking within and as my mind, and move to the physical, walk fact, and walk what it is that is here and can be developed within all through collaboration and cross referencing.

I commit myself to accept others as myself and become a support for betterment of others in self honest assessment in what will be best for the group.

J commit myself to go the pace of the group and the physical and breath through the desire to move fast.

Friday, March 1, 2013

Day 238 – Mean Character – Militant Biatch

“I become very militant within where I see that a point needs to be corrected I have found, and have a hard time putting myself in the shoes of others in these types of scenarios to see how to direct people without causing a reaction within them as well as being self honest within what reactions are going on within me.”

For reference of the above post, please see this blog.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that becoming militant with others will create an atmosphere of tension and resistances as I am using words and my physical mannerism with passive force and aggression to get my point across.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to realize that when I am passively forceful with others and aggressive within my manners and words this will create a reaction of equal force and resistance due to the nature of the words being sounded within conflict rather then equality of understanding of who we are as equals.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an atmosphere of conflict based on allowing the anger and irritation within me accumulate through my body in the backchat that is activating this anger and irritation of others in my world who don’t support what I expect to be done.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto an expectation of how something should be done based on the backchat in my head that is saying I am the only one who is trying to solve theses issues.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I let my backchat continue within my mind of thoughts of separation, I will eventually live them out as this emotions and feelings and reactions are the outlets for these built up and accumulated energies being created through the continued perception within the backchat.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in anger and irritation towards another in blame with out clearly stating my expectations and what it is that the other is causing me to be in such a reaction, and rather outburst on them with no context as to why and with no understanding of what is expected of them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a point of miscommunication and thus abuse within my actions and words towards others as mean and superior based on this belief that I am right and justified to act the way I do, when in reality I was not self honest and clear within my actions towards other in giving equal opportunity for understanding and discussions for solutions we all agree on.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow assumption within my head without allowing others the decency to realize the points that are being created by my actions towards them, and giving them the chance to integrate it and implement it in the pace and ability they are able to.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become intolerable towards others based on my desire for things to move fast and be done instantly, and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the real harm and abuse I am causing towards others who are not able to communicate with me these issues due to fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become intolerable to others pace of work and speed of them doing things, and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and thus live that all move at their own speed and pace, and in self honesty I must give all a chance to learn through support as I would want for myself and in project that I don’t have an understanding for.

Thursday, February 28, 2013

Day 237 – Walking with Others – Why People see me as Mean?

I had someone tell me today that I am mean, for context, I was directing points that were misaligned and needed to be corrected, within the setting I am in, I am not the top authority in terms of hierarchy, and so people resist me telling them what to do and how to do things. I don’t see it like this in that I am telling people what to do or how to do things, but making sure what I am seeing as not working doesn’t continue in the way it does to cause further consequence. I don’t look at it within personal terms, but more business terms, in what our as the objectives are the priorities we are setting ourselves to complete, so our job is complete, I more look at walking principles within all I do of equality and oneness with all, but here obviously I was not walking this. I become very militant within where I see that a point needs to be corrected I have found, and have a hard time putting myself in the shoes of others in these types of scenarios to see how to direct people without causing a reaction within them as well as being self honest within what reactions are going on within me.

I find it’s very easy for others if they are not motivated or don’t want to do something, in terms of ‘annoying’ task that are not enjoyable but necessary, can easily fall off the wagon so to speak, and not complete what is necessary to be completed if someone is not over them and showing them that there will be consequence if it’s not done. Consequence is the motivator, but if there is none in terms of direct in your face consequence, people easily ignore and will go more towards the easy way or self-interest. I myself realize this because I do it as well, but I also have realized within the position I held, how important it is to be on top of things and make sure that my responsibilities are upheld because if this falls it effect every other part of the chain of responsibilities needed to create the end result that is needed for our livelihood in this case. So it's a balance of being direct and getting things done and accomplished, and also doing what is best for all, considering others, and walking with rather then forcing others to get the results that is needed.

Back to my interactions with others, I am seeing how I am easily going into backchat and irritation of others based on the belief that they are not doing what they are suppose to, they are not living to their fullest potential, and I am. I find I easily will dog another but give the luxury to myself to be more gentle, I find I have this tendency to justify this behavior of harshness with others is based on the fact that within myself I have a sense of being able to get everything I need done as well as doing it to achieve others expectation in that which I am ‘good’ at. I become energized by this ‘skill’ of mine and thus use it against others as a big egotistical person, and use anger and irritation to direct me through discussions at times and disagreements. I always in my mind have this desire to prove I am right, because of course I am right, I am still not hearing others, and see myself as more skilled and better able to do most things over other human beings.

My problem is that I am not humble and I am not slowing myself down, I am moving within the speed of the mind, thus showing that I am living within my mind not the physical within my breathing awareness, and thus I react and follow my thoughts and feelings/emotions within the life situations I am in rather then being my own directive principles and standing as an equal with others, actually hearing them and treated them with the respect that I treat myself with, and allowing others to learn and come to their own conclusions, not be theboss or have the answers, but help others to learn to be the boss of themselves and their own living and find their way to the answers that will serve all. Being a support for life not a detriment as an abusive rigid egotistical person that people don’t want to be around, hardly the person that is standing for life in oneness and equality and living the message of Jesus. I would like to be here among life with others as a support in symbiosis rather then corrosion, so I will walk self forgiveness on points I see I am still missing, and live the correction.

Thanks.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to LIfe
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
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