Tonight I did an osho card reading, and the overall point I took from it was that at this time I have the potential to transcend my sorrow from my past, the suffering I have created in my life, and in this here moment expand my creation process through principles into something not only better for myself, but better for the whole of this world. I obviously see the correlation as within Desteni this is our primary focus, changing ourselves from within to what is best for all to then be able to change the outer in the best way possible as we have proven to ourselves through actually living it. I often times think about how much of my life is a struggle and how much of what I struggle with feels overwhelming and out of my reach to handle. But within this I am not in fact actually facing the real problem or pushing myself enough in each moment to do what is necessary to stop the struggle and overwhelmingness because as I realize I am creating this myself and so I have to then create the solution through my own will, there is nothing or no one else that can do this for me, I have realized this, if I don't move, my process does not move and so becomes stagnant.
A lot of the times, I am not so stable within my application because I am still accepting and allowing my back chat which is the nasty speaking of myself in the back of my mind to control and have power over me, and so diminish my effectiveness in who I can really be in this life. I can easily brush aside my need for particpation and become distracted with a whole area of things that we have created to distract ourselves with in this reality. But within dismissing and distracting myself from these backchat dimensions, I am missing the opportunity within this life to create myself new, to change myself, and let go of that which is not supporting me. To substantiate myself and so my life I have to create this for myself, there is no one else but me within this physical body and I as all have equally the ability to change our patterns that are not working for what is best for all and create solutions to then so create life.
I am focusing currently on one point and this is whenever within my mind I am hearing or seeing an experience come up of judging myself in any way, I immediately breath and stop it in awareness deliberately, and move myself within the physical in full participation meaning completely aware of directing myself to stop. I am pushing this until I am satisfied that I have proven to myself that I can stop in a moment through my own directive will. I have accepted and allowed myself to get discouraged or get overwhelmed and fall into energy in the past, and so stop my active participation in my process to really substantiate myself in the decision I have made to stop my self judgment character and become aware of my actions in the physical. Theses are cyclical points that I see I am falling into at the critical moments, so I am dedicating myself here to continue walking this process of stopping and changing in the here moment, and creating myself to be self directive by walking this process creation of myself step by step and breath by breath until it is done.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up in the difficult moments within walking a point of stopping my mind participation such as stopping my backchat and so I realize that substantiating myself in the decision I live that is aligned with life and living this decision into the physical is how to get this done.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the mind in what it is bringing up about me such as that I am less then others or greater then, and so give up in the moments where the energy becomes intense and I am feeling overwhelmed, I realize that this is the critical creation point of myself in moving beyond the mind limitation and self enslavement.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not move through the resistances to continue and push myself in this process, and so I see that within this not pushing I have diminished my potential that is here in each moment, and I realize to re-substantiate this again I have to stand and push myself when I want to give up or give in, otherwise i will continue to exist as the mind cause i am not changing myself in this critical moments.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I don’t have what it takes to move beyond my limitations and it’s just too much, when I realize, see, and understand that this process is able to be walked within a breath by breath living, no past no future, just here directing in the moment and moving myself in a process of substantiations through my living participation and building self awareness.
When and as I see I am going into a point of wanting to fall or give in to the experiences within myself, I stop and breath, and realize that these moments of extreme experiences are the crucial moments to move through and substantiate myself within because I realize I am reaching the limits to my mind consciousness system and to move beyond that will be a push because I have to create it and it's also unknown, but moving beyond limitation and the unknown resistances is who I decide to be.
I commit myself to stop my backchat in each moment I see it come up within myself through breath and physical self awareness participation of stopping.
I commit myself to stop judging myself for who I have become and what I have created, let that go, and create from a point of awareness here within an expression of equality and oneness that life is here and we only have to create it within ourselves in who we are to live it.
I commit myself to live the correction within the moments that are here to be walked by moving through resistances and facing and transcending my fears by living them and changing myself within them to understand the point and so create a new reality in self direction.
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