This character I go into quite often when I am with people,
I have created a relationship with people of fear and hostility based on the
belief that they are out to harm me and abuse me. Though through walking my
process and self investigating myself I realized that I am actually thinking
this up in my mind and so creating it in my reality because I am the creator of
myself and thus my reality. We are powerful beings, though we are not in
control of this power as of yet due to how I accepted and allowed myself to
abdicate my responsibility of myself and of my life to stand equal and one with
what is here and live what is best for all. So here walking the correction
process to change pattern by pattern, point by point.
What is creating this character of “don’t fuck with me” is a
strong desire of self importance believing to be some sort of advanced being
and within the people around me and whom I interact with on a daily basis are
beings who are so harsh and troublesome thus not as advanced. What I have
abdicated myself to not see, realize, and thus change is the way in which I am
thinking and creating my reality as I am equal and one to the outflows of what
I am experiencing within myself and thus my world. I am not becoming
disciplined enough within my breath by breath awareness to change myself when
these patterns come up with the thoughts of how ‘bad’ others are, how
‘ignorant’, how ‘disrespectful’, and within this creating this world and
reality coming from my mind projection and superimposing it into the reality I
am living within. This creating the character personality of “don’t fuck with
me” as a defense mechanism, so I don’t have to look at myself, my own mind
thoughts, my own behavior, and change within these moments to stand within what
is best for all.
Here living words I will be continue to support myself with
and expand within it’s understanding and expression as I progress, so I can go
into a form of self expression that is here, present, and not consisting of
energy or thoughts, but living words as expressions that are supportive of
life.
So some self forgiveness on this pattern of “don’t fuck with
me”:
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
go into a form of self exultation of myself in relation to those around me
believing I am more advanced and more sophisticated.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
not see, realize, and understand how my thoughts go to judging others as less
then me and how within this I am diminishing the other in my mind to become
more then and so become the winner in my own mind, not seeing, realizing, or
understanding that this is only diminishing myself as I go into a form of
suppression of who I am being and thus become limited within my reality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my thoughts
as judgments direct me in my reality in relation to others not seeing,
realizing, and understanding that I am only defining myself and thus within
this opportunity I can change and create myself within living words that are
supportive of others and of life in general.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
become hostile to others in my environment based on creating a scenario where
they are being harmful and judgmental towards me not seeing, realizing, and understanding
that within my backchat I am judging them and thinking about them lacking, and
thus I am resonating and thus creating the hostility I am experiencing as this
is who I am in thought, word, and deed.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
create a personality suit of the “don’t fuck with me” character, so I don’t
have to face the truth of myself, which is someone who is causing harm and
separation within myself and thus causing harm and separation within my reality
as what is within self is equally being created in the without.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
judge myself within my expression as not good enough or not strong enough to
face reality here and so go into a defense mechanism of “don’t fuck with me”
character to not have to face my reality and who I have created to be in fear
of people and not see, realize, and understand that I am creating this fear
that it in fact is not real as it’s energy and it moves away once dissipated.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
become suppressed within myself in not wanting to face or change the hidden
parts of myself that I don’t like and want to push away such as the lack I feel
within my expression, not seeing, realizing, and understanding that pushing
this lack emotion away I am pushing the opportunity to face it, understand it,
and change it for myself so I can realize my strengths and strengthen my
weaknesses.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
not face my mind real time and allow it to fester and sit while I continue to
suppress the reality of myself as separating myself from my responsibility to
change myself and stand within the face of my self in my reality to support
with solutions and create them for myself and others.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
want to abdicate responsibility to others in my reality and blame them for the
way I am experiencing myself within turmoil, not seeing, realizing, and
understanding that I can change myself and so change the outcome of myself
within my living.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
judge others and so judge myself and thus separate myself from life here in
oneness and equality.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to
feel so overwhelmed within myself about what is here and what I have to change,
not seeing, realizing, and understanding that this is an experience I can change
and live moment to moment, direct myself into specificity and efficiency, and
taking it point by point.
When and as I see myself going into the “don’t fuck with me”
character, I stop and breath, and change myself self into taking self
responsibility for my mind and my thoughts, stopping them through breath, and
living words that’ll support with stability. I realize I am creating harm and
separation in my reality when in this personality suit where I could be
creating stability and solutions that are best for all.
I commit myself to live the word care where I care for
myself within stopping the judgment of myself. Stopping the thoughts of being
hard on myself. Stop the attacks of myself and others in my mind as less then
or not living correctly.
I commit myself to stand within a gentleness where I move
slow and softly within my physical body, like a flow or breeze moving within
the rhythm of my breath as I move out of the energy and into my physical
stability as my body.
I commit myself to let go of the thoughts by focusing on my
physical movements and moving myself in my body, grounding the energy through
my breath into my feet and into the earth.
I commit myself to live the words equality and oneness as
physical reality were all are physical manifestations and we are all equal within
this, where no two are separate but expressing in our own expressions.
I commit myself to create
my expression within and as physical activities such as art or music and walk
self forgiveness and self correction to the thoughts that come up until I am
clear.
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