My Journey to Life: screamed at

Showing posts with label screamed at. Show all posts

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Day 280 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At – Suppression Self Correction to Live

Check out these blogs for reference to this post:
Day 276 – Intro to the 'F*ck Authority' Character
Day 277 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At
Day 278 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Yelling at Me -The Shock of a Voice
Day 279 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At - Suppression

When and as I see that I am going into a tension and fear due to a loud voice being expressed by another, I stop and breath realizing that the voice has no effect on me physically such as harming me physical, and thus I can let go of the fear by seeing that it is simply another going into reaction and thus I can remain stable and breath.

I commit myself to stop and do not participate in any reaction of another when I hear loud voices.

I commit myself to focus on who I am as stable in breath and self directed, and move myself into breath and using common sense to direct myself within the situation.

When and as I see myself react into submission when I hear a loud voice, I stop and breath, and realize that this submission is an indication of me going and being directed by fear, where I realize that it is separation and will lead to my self compromise in what I am doing.

I commit myself to flag this point of submission and find what triggered this submission of myself and correct through writing and stopping the trigger from directing me in the physical.

I commit myself to breath and find my stability within myself, embrace myself within this standing, and realize I am able to direct myself and I don’t have to accept this point of loudness as creating fear, it’s simply tone in sound or ask the other to speak softer if possible. I commit to if I react walk away until clear.

When and as I see myself go into a point of self compromise through submitting to fear and allowing others to control me through a sound of voice and accept myself as inferior to them when they are yelling loud at me or around me, I stop and breath, and realize that this is my own creation, I realize I am not fear and it is not something that I physically need to live, I can by moving though fear realizing that I am still here and thus I realize I must stop the fear and submitting to inferiority to thus stand equal with others and find solutions with others that are best.

I commit myself to stop all points of fear and thus stop all submission of inferiority through moving my physical when I see I am going into this point, and push myself to direct the point through making a decision, either facing the other or waiting due to unnecessary consequence possibly being created.

I commit myself to write and direct the point when I see I go into fear or inferiority towards another, and correct this point in my living until I am stable with all walks of life and able to direct myself when ever I face any point that within tonalities of voices.

When and as I see I am going into a memory of my dad yelling with his loud voice and smacking me on my bum because I was in trouble, I stop and breath, and realize this happened in the past and does not define me here, I am not under threat and thus cane make myself use common sense if these points come up of fear of harm through accepting the other and avoiding conflict if possible through removing myself from any point where aggression is a point that might be used.

I commit myself to stop accepting this memory of my dad in fear and tension when I hear a loud male voice, and move to find out what is the cause of the voice and understand it so I can direct myself in what will be best in common sense.

I commit to let go of my desire to be the best or have the last word with others in being loud myself and thus move myself to remove myself from the situation so further conflict and thus consequence can be avoided until I am clear and able to self direct myself in my tone of voice to be in equality not polarity.

When and as I see I am going into a point of defense in myself from a loud voice of a female and connect it to fighting with my mom, I stop and breath, and realize I am here and not in the past, I can move myself and thus direct to stop the memories because I don’t need to fight with anyone but can self direct myself to make decisions in common sense and what will be best for the situation.

I commit myself to stop directing myself in fear and thus going into a defense when I hear a women’s voice in yelling by realizing that is the past and I am here in my breathing, I commit to find my breathing and stop mymind from directing me into defense and protection when I hear a loud women’s voice as it’s simply a being voicing herself loudly.

I commit to walk with others and see why they are yelling and thus find solutions instead of seeing it as an attack.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Day 279 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At - Suppression

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into my mind when I hear a load voice yelling and fear I will get into trouble.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be directed into submission as fear when I hear a load voice and thus become docile and forgiving towards that other person regardless of what they are doing to me or to others for them to stop being mad at me or yell at me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a compromised position within myself towards others who are yelling as docile and forgiving without understanding or realizing what is the purpose of the yelling and if I can direct it into a best for all solution, but based on fear coward and stop my interactions of expression towards this other and suppress myself to not have to face them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become docile and suppress my expression around others when I hear yelling based on a memory of my dad yelling at me and him making me go to my room with a smack on my rear, and thus tense up and go into a fright when I hear a load voice based on fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a point of defense and protection of myself when I hear a load voice of a women based on a memory of my mom yelling at me and creating a point of defense of her vs me, and thus when I hear a voice similar I automatically go into this battle mentality and become tense and anxious for this meeting.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have a rush of anxiety run through my body when I hear a load voice based on seeing that I am less then this person with the loud voice and that I have to submit to them or go into conflict to be able to deal with this person who is yelling at me and get out of this situation which I didn’t care to be in in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed polarities as submit or fight to direct me when another is yelling instead of realizing what I can do in self direction to calm the position of the other down through understanding the other in equal consideration to myself regardless of the tone of there voice and thus direct in common sense for what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist being with people with load voices or whospeak allot due to this fear of being overtaken and having to submit to them and thus feel inferior to them as I am allowing myself to feel this way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel inferior to those who are loud because I believe that I can’t compete and thus coward to their aggressiveness and not direct the point regardless of my fear or feelings.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed feelings and fear to direct me around another with a load voice instead of assessing the situation in common sense and seeing what direction is necessary to take in what is best and directing any conflict into a solution in equal consideration of all involved.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Day 278 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Yelling at Me -The Shock of a Voice

Check out these blogs for reference to this post:

Day 276 – Intro to the 'F*ck Authority' Character
Day 277 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get a fright when I hear a high pitched voice in the manner of forceful speaking towards another or myself, and thus within myself go into a restriction and suppression in fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to attach the thought of “I am going to be in trouble” when I hear a high pitched voice or scream from another, and thus go into a defense mechanism as tension.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being in trouble by another and thus resist this yelling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a defense mechanism when I hear my named spoken in a high pitched voice and immediately allow the fear and tension to possess me with a nauseas feeling within my solar plexus area and want to escape the person yelling.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go to the person screaming at me or another in apprehension in a point of defense of being harmed and then immediately look in my thoughts to how I cancompete with this person to be able to do battle.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react and thus go into defense in a point of seeingthis person yelling as a threat to me in separation rather then seeing this person as me in a state of reaction themselves, and realize the point of my own self correction necessary to resolve the conflict within the other as I have realized for myself which is to see that the conflict is not a solution but walking together in a point of understanding and agreement is, and thus show the other if rather then go against.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into my mind as blame and believe that this person is wrong and yelling at me for an unfair reason, and thus immediately resist what is being said to me and not direct the point, but go into reaction towards this person.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get a sense of relief when I see that I am not the one who is being yelled at and thus feel positive within myself because I avoided point of conflict andpotential harm.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use this positive feeling to make myself feel better about myself and not consider the other whom is being yelled at and not go and find a point of support for this person, but rather avoid them because of fear and it not wanting to be me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid situations where high voices are being used because of this fear of shock I experienced as a kid when I was yelled at by adults.

When and as I see that I am going into a point of resistance when I hear yelling, I stop and breath, and realize that the yelling of another is not in anyway able or can effect me unless I allow it to.

When and as I see that I am going into fear of the yelling and going into reaction of suppression and defense, I stop and breath, and I realize that the fear is not real it’s only my mind creating this point of fear of harm and the defense of myself is no solution as this cause conflict with myself and the other, I realize I am here and able to direct the situation into a point of solution for myself and others through realizing the other is me and walking what I would want for myself with the other in a point of understanding and support.

I commit myself to let go of the fear and resistance when the yelling is going on through breathing, and continue to breath as the yelling is going focusing on the point that I do not have to be effected by this. I use my common sense and only approach the other if they are calm and can hear what I am saying, always within a point of equality and support for what is best to solve the conflict or tension.

I commit to not approach another in conflict and instigation, but walk in a point of harmony and understanding through my words and demeanor as being non aggressive through not reacting and care.

I commit myself to push non-reaction by using my breath, and focusing on the point of solution and what the issue is within the reason for the yelling in the first place.

I commit myself to continue to direct the situations where I am able to with conflict and find the solutions that will support stability within the group and my self in what will be best for all.

Photo Source

Day 277 – “F*ck Authority” Character – Being Yelled At

Check out this blog for reference to this post:

Day 276 – Intro to the 'F*ck Authority' Character

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry when another triggers being yelled at, which created a point of inferiority within me in where I saw I needed to regain my standing through using anger to become the strong one again and thus use force through my words or body to get my position of authority back.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to thus resist authority but within myself desire it, and thus create an internal conflict of desire and resistance to the point of authority where I cycle back and forth and never am able to remain here and thus am unable to direct to a point of what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be in an authorative position and thus will use what I don’t like done unto me as yelling onto another because I see that this is really the only way to get authority back, but realizing this is not real authority but enslavement through force. Real authority I realize is through controlling self and directing self to be able to manage one’s own authority as self-direction to do what is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed to take what others say or do to me as an attack on my authority and thus seek revenge based on me taking the other’s yelling at me personal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to seek to become stronger then others to have more power and control over others and so will easily become angered and takes words personally as I have created a certain idea and image of myself as an authoritive person and thus when someone takes this image and doesn’t see the same, I take this personal and seek to use competition to win back my position.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be seen as more then others and thus desire the feelings of superiority and control and power over others, where I am not realizing, seeing, or understanding that taking from another what is already here within both as self direction as our own authrotive will is creating a diminishment within me because I am separating the life that is here as me with the other.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame this disharmony on the one yelling at me when I realize when I bring this blame back to myself I am the one accepting the yelling as a personal attack, when I realize I can breath, let it go, and direct the situation when it is able to be directed or walk away if there is no sign of solution able to be accessed at that time, I am the one taking it personal thus it is my responsibility to stop this and not go into blame as blame is an outflow of self abdication of facing self responsibility and change.

When and as I go into a point of taking another’s yelling towards me personal, I stop and breath, and realize I do not need to go into reaction but can direct myself through breathing, letting go of the point of taking the yelling personal through taking responsibility for my reactions by stopping them, and direct the point into solution that is best for all.

When and as I go into a point of reacting in anger or blame towards another, I stop and breath, and realize that this is a point of outflow of taking the mind as a personal attack and thus wanting to abdicate my responsibility within my creation of creating the point of blame and anger within myself, as I realize I created it through my own permission, so I realize I can simply let it go as this is an outflow of reaction within the other as yelling, and direct myself as the situation through taking responsibility of myself and directing the point into a resolution that will calm the situation down and create harmony through understanding as equals if this is possible.

I commit myself to stop and breath when I see point of reaction come up within me when someone yell at me, see what is being said in awareness of the equality within us and through taking self responsibility, and direct the point if there is a stable situation to do so for an outcome that will benefit both.

I commit myself to see when I go into an anger or blame reaction, to stop, and write out the point of what I am blaming or becoming angry at if I don’t see it in that moment to immediately correct, if I am able to I push to stop reacting and bring the point to correction through immediate action, or flag it and open it up in writing when I am able to to be understood through self forgiveness and self commitments.

For Further Support, Please check out Links:
Free Desteni I Process Lite Course for All Ages
Journey to Life Group
Creation's Journey to Life
Earth's Journey to Life
Heaven's Journey to Life
Eqafe Life Products - Self Help
Desteni Site
Desteni Wiki