A Lady's Journey to Life: Opening Up the Mind Construct of Impatience

One thing I am noticing recently about myself is the lack of patience I have which I have written about before, though it is still here. I am mostly noticing this within my day to day living such as becoming annoyed at someone driving slow in front of me, my dog barking at a neighbor, my dog sniffing a spot for too much time, the birds chirping outside my window, my pillows not being positioned in a way I am most comfortable, my room being too small, and the list could go on if I include my irritation toward the people in my world at times, I mean I go into annoyance often enough where I am now writing a blog about it and correcting it once and for all. Obviously walking my process from consciousness to self awareness, I am investigating all things and keeping that which is good, and the fact that I am creating a source of conflict within myself toward the my external reality through living out the act of impatience by shouting or speaking fast or becoming rude or not considering another equal to myself is showing that there is a point of self interest I am accessing, and so not adhering to the principle of prevention is the best cure as well as accepting all here as self, which is in fact what is real as all life is equal and one.

Now, this is a point I am writing about because I am still showing that I am being dictated by irritation and this steaming from my lack of patience’s with my world and so this external impatience mirroring the internal impatience I have with myself. I see in a way where these impatience actions outflowing into irritation is steaming from ideas/beliefs/desires/fears that I have created within my mind and projected it onto reality, so within this I am living from the alternate reality through my mind as my fears/desires/ideas/beliefs instead of moving with the pace of breath, here.

I have an example, which I can better explain what here as breath means, I take henri my dog on walks, and we go down paths with big trees, henri likes to run ahead and sniff around and explore the woods around us. I had the idea to hide behind a tree to see what henri would do, and I found I could not stand behind the tree for more then 15 seconds because I went into the emotion of feeling guilty based on his reaction of alertness and wonderment of where I was. I assumed within him he is going into fear, so I pop out behind the tree and he sees me and turns around and continues to do the exact same thing he was doing before he noticed I had disappeared. So here is an example of ‘being here’, Henri was living within the present (here) moment, where we are walking and he is sniffing, he looks back and sees I am not there and based on the reality of his situation, I am no where to be seen, he goes into an alertness where his ears perk out and he goes stiff to be able to listen intently. He does not do what I did in that moment, which is react in emotion, he goes into his physical body and uses his resources to solve the problem, making for much more efficiency in his resources within himself and not creating extra ‘baggage’ so to speak with going into the alternate dimensions of for example thoughts such as “she left me, does she not love me anymore?” “oh god, I am going to die out here, I don’t know where to go?” “what a bitch, where did she go?” (Henri hypothetical thoughts).

And when I pop out, he is not thinking “you are so mean, don’t do that again”, or goes into any physical indication of emotions like crying or aggression, he simply turns around and continues on with what he is doing, there was no reaction only stability. He was showing he was moving within what is here, he took in information in each moment, assessed, and moved within a common sense path using his physical body as support, he remained stable and continued to be stable for the entire duration of the exercise.

So a cool example for me to see what this moment of ‘being here’ looks like, it’s one where emotions/feelings are not visible or accessed but a physical presence of stability is shown, I obviously realize through walking this process that emotions and feelings are created through thinking, so when I access the thoughts as I used for example with Henri’s hypothetical, you can see how much more baggage and more taxing our bodies go through due to all this participation in thoughts and energy as emotions and feelings we go into. I was more tired after that ordeal within me because of the spike of guilty emotion laced in fear due to my thoughts that he was going to suffer in some way if I didn’t show myself. Dogs have a different purpose then humans do on this planet, and I suggest to check out the links below to find out more information of dogs history as well as many other animals, but for my process here I am looking at what thoughts, emotions, and feelings I am accessing and continuing to fuel through participating and living out the personality of ‘irritation’ and ‘impatience’ and the many dimensions that this includes.

I will continue in my next blog, thanks for reading.

Interview Support on Animals' Perspectives:
Animals on Eqafe

Dog Series:
Pets and Owners Relationship Review - Part 1
Pets and Owners Relationship Review - Part 2
Pets and Owners Relationship Review - Part 3

Pet and Owners Relationship Review - Part 4
Pets and Owners Relationship Review - Part 5