Self Forgiveness (Day 7): Irrational Fears - Fear of Microwave, Cellphones, Machines, Lightning - Day 585

Art By: Andrew Gable

Find his Blog here: https://anartistsjourneytolife.wordpress.com

I am going to do a few blogs on things that seem irrational, but in my mind have a lot of subtle and sometimes overt power over me in day to day life, it stems a lot of the time from childhood memories, so I am also pushing self forgiveness on these childhood memories that I still am triggered by in my day to day life. This one is about machines and mechanics we use in everyday life like lights, microwave, and lights for instance.

So a fear I have had for a long time and react to still subtle within myself is the fear that I am going to get sick from cell phones cause I have memories of being told that things mechanical are harmful, such as when my mom told me not to stand in front of the microwave or how aspartame will cause cancer. I have always been afraid of this world and the life within it irrationally due to just reacting to the picture or the sounds of the machine on a resonate physical level than actually understanding how the machine works. I will start walking self forgiveness on my childhood memories that are coming up with this pattern.

I was standing in front of the microwave in our old kitchen, I was looking into the microwave on my knees on the counter, and my mom came around the corner and yelled ‘Garbrielle! Get off the counter, the microwave can cause cancer!’ So I Jumped off and thought to myself ‘holy shit, I don’t want that’, so there was a belief that was created in that moment that I needed to be fearful of the microwave, reacting in like a shock experience when one starts to run.

So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into a huge intense fright when my mom walked in while I was intently focused on the food going around in the microwave, how it spun, and just focused on learning from it, and went into a shock when she yelled at me, allowing me to lose focus and imprint the fear of cancer is caused by machines, tools we use, things that exist in the outer world.

Self Forgiveness:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lose focus in that moment due to hearing a loud noise and going into a shock experience where I reacted in anger and blame toward my mom for scaring me like that, and so went into anger and blame emotion in that moment rather than breathing and moving into my physical body as breath to slow down and find what makes sense to live next that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to in that moment of yelling at my mom in my backchat, I lost focus and so awareness of my reality, where I allowed a belief of my mothers be passed on to me as I accepted and allowed it and so didn’t follow up in any real time investigation and so solutions that I could live to support me to understand my reality and how it works with more clarity and common sense.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be shown the answers in life, to not want to have to do the actual physical labor it takes to understand how something works in all ways, and so within that walk the necessary correction processes it’ll take to perfect the point within me and so within reality eventually.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire answers from my reality, showing me who I am and what works best for me because underneath that desire was a fear of dying and things being over and done with, so gaining knowledge as a way to combat death when in reality this is a belief and non sensical due to the fact that it’s not about death but how this reality works that I must learn and fear is not needed in these living applications.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the death of myself because I have not yet realized and lived the fact that life can not die, that it is eternal, and that when I am in fear it is my own self limitations I am currently accepting and allowing in my world and so the world at large.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear death and so waste my time on memories and reacting to that in repetition every time I see a microwave or eat food or hear machines running, I as see realize and understand, I can understand what these machines due with more specificity and find solutions to the points I am uncertain about such as the actual facts of harm on microwave pulses and what radiation is for instance, how is it created, and what causes its effect, what are there as solutions if any are required, and be open to creating the reality in equality and oneness with what I am interacting with rather then fear and separation and thus blame/self dishonesty.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to fight for my self-limitations because I fear without those comforts in my life I will not find comfort on the other side of that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe within myself that I am not able to handle taking full self-responsibility of myself in this life, and so then create a fear of regret at the end of my life because I didn’t push harder. Instead of myself, working with the day to day life and taking my responsibility to work with what is here breath by breath, making it simple and direct, and so doing my best to handle what is here with self honesty and self responsibility when it comes up such as facing fears and being patient to find the solution through understanding.

Self Commitments to Live Change that is Best for all:

I commit myself to learn about where I react on physical levels within or subtle levels or even conscious levels within me to machines, microwaves, cell phones, fluorescent lights, unnatural lights in buildings, food additives, and within this take each one, learning about the physical facts of these points, also get the extra perspective from eqafe and open myself up to solutions that is best for all and so will be best for me to diffuse the fear and live with it in the best way possible or find ways to transmute it so it can be something of value for all here.

I commit myself to stand in self-responsibility in my day to day, breath to breath moments where I see I am able to walk a point of change within myself, and so stand within courage to face self, change, and stand within the responsibility I see I can stand as and do what is best for all life in common sense.

I commit myself to honor myself in this venture by recognizing specifically my triumphs when I do succeed building the self empire of life as who and how I would like to live and so be able to substantiate myself in reality with ‘memories’ of direct living and change that I myself walked, took responsibility for, and lived for myself in honor of all as self.

I commit myself as life to walk the process of learning from my mistakes, being open to all possible outcomes and understandings first before I stand and direct myself to what is best for all within a moment of decision, so working with living the word purposeful patience’s as I walk a process of changing myself in understanding and realizing the resolve to stand as it as I created it within and as myself.

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http://www.earthhaven.org

Will We Change Our Ways Before Our Ways Change Us? - Day 378

I have been reading many disturbing articles about the state of the oceans filtering into the animals on land because of the fukushima accident in 2011. Radiation is leaking into the ocean since this happened and has not only killed off many of the ocean life around that area and across the ocean to the north American continent, but the animals on land and ourselves as well. So I am now reading that it has gotten into the food chain and eventually is going to effect many people. Radiation does not leave the body, but only accumulates. This all due to man made influences and the profit driven consumerism market we are existing within, even down to those who are cleaning the area, they are not experts as you may think, but the poor workers and criminals who have no other choice but to work to survive as no one wants to be poisoned through working in such close proximity.

The interesting thing is that no one hardly even knows about what is actually happening based on the media keeping it quite hushed and people not really being aware of the acceptance and allowances we are allowing due to our implicitness to what our media says and not questioning anything out of the ordinary. Why don’t people care about this issue or even seem to know about it, I would say it is due to the desires for hope, things to be good, things to work out, and so we as the population stand by as our world is being destroyed by those trying to make the most money. If we continue in this way the problems such as the leaking of radiation into our food supplies is going to continue and become worse. It’s not that people don’t know or understand this, but they believe there is nothing that can be done, there is no solution because it seems quite huge.

The solution is in the first step of seeing reality for what it is and moving towards understanding it and stopping the ignorance towards it so a solution can in fact be found. Why we are existing in the scenario of it having to get to a point of no return is due to this fact that we are not here, we are only existing in our minds and so will only see what the mind shows us, the desire for happy times when in reality this is not real, it’s not happening in such a way, and so is not at all relevant. What is relevant and matters is what is happening in reality and what we are doing about it.

The point I would suggest for all who is willing to move themselves is stop the complacency and move towards a solution that will support everyone, there is the equal life proposal of a living income guarantee which will change the way in which we govern ourselves on this planet and allow unity to be developed and implemented into the way we exist in our system of functional living. It’s in the way we live that the solution is, the change that is necessary to continue existing on this planet, and the responsibilities of ourselves to walk the change that needs to be done to ensure that there is a respect for life with all who exist here. We don’t have to come to this scenario again where we are on the brink of self destruction, but can enjoy each other and this world as it was supposed to be lived, in equality and what is best for all. Support the equal life foundation and the living income guarantee proposal.

Presenting the Fundamental Human Rights 

by Equal Life Foundation

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Day 205 - More on Fears

I have had this fear for a while and it’s fear of getting sick, I have been getting this sharp pain in my side and checked it out with a few sources, and its this fear of death I am facing and looking at that is creating such pain. I am the one creating what is here within myself, so I have to walk the correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create this fear within me of getting cancer from all the electronic things I use such as phones and computers based on hearing and reading studies of how these electromagnetic forces will cause cancer and is everywhere. Also within foods we eat, like there is no way around it. I realize though that fear in itself is just an energy of the mind and thus not real as it’s created within moments in my mind and will end as soon as it come. I understand that this fear is and will have no bearing on whether or not I get an illness or not, and thus there is no common sense within staying in this fear and allowing it to effect my life within wasting time in my head worrying about it.

I commit myself to when and as I see that I am going into thoughts of fearing having cancer or fearing dying, I stop and breath, and do not accept myself to go into this thought pattern. I align with the physical in my breath and commit myself to walk the steps to lessen my usage of these gadgets and electronics, and find solutions such as food that are substance for the body or ways to not be so exposed to these forces. Also, I commit myself to work for a solution to this system of profit driven self interest with a system that honor life equal to money and thus put in place all things that honor life equally as well.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having my life to live, not having my home to live in, not having my car to drive in, not have work to go to, and not having money to live on. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear anything happening to henri because I have grown attached to him and fear not having his comfort and presence in my presence which I absolutely enjoy, but this done in self interest based on the fact that I fear living without him because he gives me comfort that I don’t get anywhere else. So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to really fear losing this feeling of comfort I get from henri rather than seeing henri as an equal and allowing freedom within our relationship as equals, no dependence and thus emotions, but here as equals in the understanding that I can’t be lost and nor can he because we are always here within life, we are one and equal and thus to be dependent and addicted to feelings is not giving what I would want to Henri which is a freedom within expression.

I commit myself to when and as I go into this point of fear towards losing henri, I stop and breath, and push myself to let go of the feelings of comfort I have attached to him by focusing on the physical by becoming aware of our physical interaction and communication in the principles of equality and do what I like done to me. I see I have a choice and thus I chose life in equality and stop my mind as energy in separation of a need or a want cause this is not real and not true freedom of Henri and thus life in general.

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