Day 13 - Restart - self discipline

I have been very unmotivated and feeling in a depressed state, I have fallen a lot these last few years really badly at times and it's been quite difficult to get back on my feet. The falls and the digging deep into regret and unknown circumstances created by not standing in what is best at the opportunities that are here that life give, when I miss those it's like getting back up from harden cement, painful, difficult, and makes one want to give up. Giving up seems quite cool as a solution in this state for a moment, like the mcdonalds of things, taste good in the moment, but after digestion and the body having to deal and face with the consequences, self feel it, the pain, hardship and the difficulty, so it's a matter of how much do one want to bear. For me, I am not wanting to bear any form of suffering or pain and definitely don't want to inflict it on others as well, though the understanding of falls does bear consequences and in this what requires action is in the physical, here as the breathe of life is gifting me the life tools of with self forgiveness, self corrective writing/sounding, and living the change. Making the forgiveness of self actionable and livable here in my life and so in this can then correct the outcomes to come and stop the consequences of harm/abuse and falling to be that which is best for all and best for self. 

This starts with self discipline, moving beyond limitations and self beliefs/ideas, I am going to start with daily blogging and in this living my self forgiveness as i blog/write and exist in my world. Self discipline the action of self that is required to do these actions and keep going, not giving up, especially in the times when it's difficult and one do want to give up/give in. No judgment but breathing and living here. 

Discipline definition - 

" is the self-control that is gained by requiring that rules or orders be obeyed, and the ability to keep working at something that is difficult.[1] Disciplinarians believe that such self-control is of the utmost importance and enforce a set of rules that aim to develop such behavior. Such enforcement is sometimes based on punishment, although there is a clear difference between the two. One way to convey such differences is through the root meaning of each word: discipline means “to teach”, while punishment means “to correct or cause pain”. While punishment might extinguish unwanted behavior in the moment, it is greatly effective long-term due to consequences being understood and societal retribution to wrongs committed , while discipline usually is the process of training self control.[2]" from wikpedia.

Self Forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become complacent within my daily actions of bettering myself and my environment based on becoming too much wrapped in my thoughts and self judgment and so lack the discipline of doing what i understand requires to be done to get myself moving and expanding beyond my limitations.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to go into my mind and think about the past and in this become unmotivated based on self judgment and in this lose my desire and perseverance to move and remain discipline to my principles and goals i set out for myself. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i don't have to be disciplined anymore due to my fall and that i have no hope to become life and stand in a way of honor of life. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i have no reason to be discipline due to a fall and in this believe i can just float.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thoughts that i can float when i see, realize, and understand there is consequences within this and that it is much more advantageous to stand up and get back to self discipline and the principles of life that i stand as and for as what is best for all life. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe being self discipline is too hard instead of just doing it. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to move into a form of self harm where i believe i am not worth it or have value and so i don't need to be disciplined because it won't matter anyway.

i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to accept the self deprecating thoughts of i am not worth it and so no need to remain disciplined with myself in actions that support myself and life as a whole.

i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not worthy and connect that to be lazy and giving up.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i am lazy and can give up, when i see, realize, and understand that this is not real and that life is always here to align with and stand as as this i understand is what is real and who i am for real.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i am unworthy and so allow the emotions of giving up where i go into a tiredness in my body and numbness and in this believe i can't do it.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to give into the energy that i can't do it instead of staying within and as the act of self discipline where i continue to move beyond my limitations and expand to what is here within life measure and what is possible.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed tiredness and heaviness come over me as a point of wanting to give up instead of breathing through these moments in the moment and continue to walk the steps of self change as self action through self discipline. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to hold onto the past and my misstakes and int his continue to let go of the past and change myself here through self discipline and living action plans aligned with principles. 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i can't do it instead of just doing it step by step.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to think rather then acting in the moment. 

I commit myself to move into self discipline within my day to day actions where i see the thoughts of giving up or feeling unworthy and in this i use the living word self discipline to move through and beyond these thoughts and into physical action where real change of myself can happen and i can help myself and so help others. 

I commit myself to let go of the tiredness and heaviness emotions by breathing through the energy and doing what it is physical i am avoiding. 

I commit myself to use the living word discipline to stand and walk physical through the resistance to get the point step by step in motion as physical action.

I commit myself to make goals for myself to achieve and support my daily habits to be that of self discipline where i control my actions as outcomes to be best for me and so best for all.

I commit myself to do daily habits as my daily routine that practice discipline.

I commit myself to stop judging myself in the moment and breathe, and continue to live in the physical and become real by physically acting on my principles and commitments to make them real and best. 

I commit myself to let go of the thoughts as they come as my past and continue to move physical releasing the thoughts through breathe and self forgiveness as sound. 

www.desteni.org

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www.creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com

Self Help course to start the journey to life:

lite.desteniiprocess.com

Best for all life until it's done.