Monday, December 22, 2014

Stubbornness: How am I creating this within myself? – Day 440

I listened to the first interview in the Atlantean’s series on the construct of stubbornness that I have placed on the bottom of this blog, it was on the understanding of how stubbornness is created within us, and how it effects our lives within ourselves and with other people. Some insightful take aways that I realized is that to go into stubbornness is a form of serving the mind because I am allowing the experience of ‘I can do things alone’ for instance hinder my opportunity to gain assistance and support from other people in my world. I often go into this experience where I don’t want to be helped or supported by another and use stubbornness to not have to engage with others so I can protect my mind, my fears, and my self belief that I have things under control.

Realizing that within this fear and belief of myself I am compromising my self development as well as potentially harming my physical body by not considering if I really do need help or not, but just become driven by fear and the desire to have things my way. The fear being that I will come to a point with another where I will be challenged, and through that challenge I could potentially fall or fail and so be vulnerable by others to judge me or attack me. I fear this based on the fact that within myself I have judged and attacked others for falling or failing in some way or another. So because I do that within my backchat towards others, I will hold back and shy away from allowing other people into my world to support me and thus expand myself into situations where I will be challenged and tested on who I am, thus stunting and compromising myself.

Stubbornness is the experience within myself I use to continue to exist within this pattern, I have seen it many times come up in my current relationship with my partner, where I do not want to face the fact that I am in fear and so rather then taking responsibility, will attack and go into a form of stubbornness in not having to face myself in the request of my partner to do something I am uncomfortable with.

So this is a cool point to understand for myself and show that when I start to see this point of wanting to be alone, resisting getting support from others, and not walking the tools that are here on a consistent basis to move myself through points that are consequential, I then can move and implement the changes I construct to stop this pattern from taking over and serve myself as life and walk the process to align with life here in the physical as I move myself here in the self correction process.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see that who I am within and as stubbornness is creating a form of servancy to the mind as the enslavement of life by compromising my potential to expand and grow with other’s support through resisting it and wanting to do things on my own.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see that who I am being within myself in these moments where I go into the stubbornness of not wanting to hear or receive support from other’s is someone who is pushing against the grain, pushing and resisting other people and their words, and creating consequence that is harmful and destructive to the opportunity that is here to build relationships with others as a point of living and implementing oneness and equality in who I am here.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within this experience of stubbornness go into hiding the fact from myself that I am in fear of facing challenges that I will surely face with others where I don’t know what will come and so what I will need to do or have in place to get through it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into sturbbornness and essentially dilude my abilities here to change who I am to become more skilled, learn more, engage more, and so expand more with others because of this fear of failing or being judged by others for messing up.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to let go of the fear of being judged or failing at something as I realize, see, and understand within falling or failing in something you are given a gift of seeing who you are and how you can change through the miss-take to perfect that point in the trys ahead and so slowly become more specified in my application and push myself beyond my limits and expand.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to engage in judgment and making fun and rejecting others who have fallen or messed up or failed in something to then make myself feel more important, though realizing this just creates the entrapment within the cycle of fear of movement as I myself will then fear what I have created with others, continuing the cycle of harm and abuse.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to abuse others when they have taken a miss-take and used there hardship for my gain in self interest to feel good or positive about myself cause I wasn’t the one who failed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use another being for my personal gain instead of standing equal to another and realizing they are me in another pair of shoes.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the form of stubbornness to not have to face myself in real time with challenges and can escape into myself and the comfort of my own habits by myself only answering to myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear taking responsibility for myself and so for others when I have to face challenges in my life and so use stubbornness to not have to move myself beyond my fears and limitations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing me here in reality and so I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, and understand I have created the now manifesting consequences in the physical, and so I have to walk through and face these consequences once and for all and so stop postponing my process of change and so the process of changing life into a world that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use the experience of stubbornness to postpone the inevitable of facing myself here in reality and changing to be a being of correction of self integrity and creating solutions that is best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to continue waiting and postponing for myself and so use stubbornness to hide within and escape for a time period that will end.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste time and not move beyond my limitations as stubbornness and expand myself in the potential that I see is possible.

When and as I see I am going into a form of postponement or stubbornness within the act of avoiding facing myself, I stop and breath, and realize this will only prolong the inevitable of having to change myself here or in the hereafter, I will face myself, I realize I have all the tools and the will and the ability to walk it here on earth where it counts.

I commit myself to breath when I see the experience of stubbornness comes up to not move myself and physically move myself to go into the physical opportunity that is here to face myself and change.

I commit myself to face my fears and move myself in physical reality beyond my limitations and boundaries through breath.

I commit myself to use the tools as much as I am able to to ensure I walk all the points necessary and continue to move forward in my process of self creation.

I commit myself to stop allowing abdication of my responsibility through hiding in stubbornness by taking on more projects with others and becoming more social.

I commit myself to push my communication with others and push through the experience to do things on my own and go into my comfort zone.

I commit myself to stop escaping reality into my mind as comfort zones and always push myself into the uncomfortableness of reality as myself as I realize this is where change is for the best.

Interview Support on the topic of Stubbornness:
Stubbornness: Introduction - Atlanteans - Part 154
Stubbornness: Overcoming - Atlanteans - Part 155
Stubbornness: Practical Application - Atlanteans - Part 156
Stubbornness: Self Forgiveness - Atlanteans - Part 157
Stubbornness: Redesigning - Atlanteans - Part 158
Physical Sound - Atlanteans - Part 159
The Consequences of Speaking - Atlanteans - Part 160
Stubbornness: Independence, Dependence, Interdependence - Atlanteans - Part 161

Check Out these Awesome and Life Supporting sites:
Desteni I Process Lite - Free Course to Start your Journey to Life
Journey to Life Group - On Facebook
Desteni Wiki - For All Things Desteni Related
Desteni Forum - Share your Self with Other Destonians
Destonian Social Network
Eqafe - Self Perfection Support
Equal Life Foundation - Site

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